When There's No Trust
by OncomingBadWolf
Summary: Rose has detached herself from the Doctor and he can't understand why. How will he bare it when he learns her trust in him has vanished? They’re slipping further apart, but the nightmare is far from over... - A Tenth, Rose & Mickey story, Post GitF. WIP -
1. Realisation

**When There's No Trust **

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Doctor Who in any way, shape or form. This is for fun; no profit given. Well... except some wonderful, constructive reviews of course -hint,hint-

**Pairing(s):** 10Rose, MickeyRose

**Chapter Rating:** K+

**Genre(s):** Angst/ Hurt/Comfort/ Romance/ sci-fi... (I know - a lot)

**Summary:** Rose has detached herself from the Doctor when he needs to understand. Has he already left it too late? How will he bear it when he learns her trust in him has vanished? They're slipping further apart, but the nightmare is far from over...

Set about a week after 'The Girl in the Fireplace', so spoilers for that and anything before.

**A.N:** Okay, this is an AU Doctor Who fic from GitF onwards. It explores the Doctor's, Rose's, and Mickey's relationship on the Tardis, and the pain that they, Rose in particular, face when the Doctor abandons her and Mickey on the space station. **However** it's important to remember that this story strictly deals (at least at the start) with how they feel after being **left behind** , not because he fell for Reneitte. There is not one bad word about Reneiette. In fact, she is hardly mentioned. In this story, Rose bears no grudge against _her_ ... but as for one against the _Doctor..._ well that's the story I'm telling, right now...

Edited Slightly for grammar, re-wording and spelling mistakes - 27/09/08

* * *

**Chapter I - Realisation **

The Doctor didn't look up when Mickey entered.

He was sat on the sofa in the console room; his legs crossed, a book sat in his hand and eyes were fixed down upon it, looking through his dark rimmed spectacles that were propped carefully on the end of his nose. He licked the end of his finger before he turned the page, thoughtful features in place. His brow was crinkled in concentration as he read on, and he looked in no way like he wanted to be disturbed.

Not that that was going to stop Mickey, of course. "Doctor," he said carefully and abruptly, crossing his arms and standing next to the sofa, by the Timelord.

For a moment, Mickey wondered if the Doctor had not heard him. He didn't look up at him. His eyes vibrated down the page for several more moments, still with the same expression. Then he sighed, slotting a rectangular piece of card inside the book at his page as a bookmark, and closed it carefully. He placed it next to him on the sofa, and then, finally, turned his gaze to Mickey.

"Mickey-the-idiot?" the Doctor said, with the air of only just noticing he was there. His eyebrows rose. "Fancy seeing you here," he exclaimed, as if Mickey hadn't been travelling with the Timelord for over a week – Tardis time.

Mickey rolled his eyes, then his gaze fell upon the book lying on the sofa, "I thought you could read somethin' in, like, a few seconds? You're not even half way through that."

"Who told you that?" the Doctor asked, leaning back and crossing his arms in the same manner as Mickey, eye brows raised. The boy in front of him shrugged, and the Doctor waved a hand dismissively. "Never hurts to be thorough." Then he smirked, "Not that you'd know, when was the last time you read a book?"

"I read!" Mickey exclaimed in outrage.

"Really? What was the last thing you read?" The Doctor's brows shot higher, in danger of disappearing into his wild brown hair.

"I was readin' this mornin'!" he insisted, and the Doctor looked at him pointedly. He shrugged, "Well… football magazine… I was still readin' though. An' I bet it was more interesting than whatever that is," he waved his hand to the Doctor's book.

The Doctor scoffed, "As if." He went over to the control panel, "So? You're in here - you want something. Does that mean you're ready to go somewhere else? Into some other unknown?" He grinned, and looked toward the corridor, "Where's Rose? Can't have her missing out. We could go back to the nineteen-fifties… meet Elvis! Ooh, or World war two… only, not in France, the actual war isn't pleasant… We could meet Winston Churchill! Good man; Winston Churchill!"

Mickey simply stared at the Doctor as he enthused through his babble; arms still crossed tightly, an unpleasant glare in place.

"There's ten-sixty-six, we could meet William the Conqueror, eh? Or we could… We could…" he stopped, his enthusiasm draining as he eyed Mickey uneasily, "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"How long have we been in the Tardis now, since the space station?" Mickey asked, with the threatening glare still blazing at the Doctor.

"I don't know," the Doctor frowned thoughtfully. "A bit under a week… or a bit more…" he shrugged. "Why? Feel cooped up? I just said we can go anywhere you like right now… wherever you like… God, I'm even letting you choose..." He shook his head in wonder.

"I wasn't talkin' about that."

The Doctor frowned. "I'm sorry I must have gained the wrong impression when you asked me about it." he muttered sarcastically. He shook his head. "You've lost me…"

"How long since you talked to Rose?"

"What are you dithering on about? I talked to just the other… last… I mean just the other…" He frowned. The other what? said a voice in his head suddenly. Hour? Day? Week? "Well, I spoke to her just this morning," he announced, remembering.

"You said good morning, she didn't reply, and you've said nothing to her since," Mickey said tightly.

"They were words, weren't they!" he exclaimed. Then he stopped, and his face fell. When had it gotten this bad? He looked at Mickey, "Is she okay?"

Mickey shrugged. "Difficult to tell," he admitted honestly.

"Well, what's wrong with her?" the Doctor said with evident concern.

Mickey shook his head, "If you don't know, I ain't gonna tell you." The Timelord's shoulders slumped and he looked a little lost for a moment. Mickey took pity on him, "Did you really think she was okay? She's barely said two words to ya this past week, didn't you notice?"

"Well, yes, I just…" He trailed off and stared ahead in thought; yes, he had noticed, of course he'd noticed, how could he not? And his worry had increased the longer it went on, but he hadn't really known what to do about it… he'd simply told himself it was just a phase, or a mood, or maybe something to do with the human female brain this time of the month or something.

"Just what Doctor?"

"I don't know," he exclaimed, finding this conversation with this particular young man more than a little difficult. He glared at Mickey, "Tell me what's wrong with her then?"

"I already said I'm not spellin' out to you," Mickey guffawed. The Doctor ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "Ha-ha!" cried Mickey in triumph. "Don't like it when 'Mickey-the-idiot' knows somethin' you don't, do ya? Feelin' a bit lost, Doctor?"

The Doctor glared at him, and was just about to say something – any degree of wit that would wipe the smirk off of his face would do – when a quiet, familiar, female voice came quietly from the doorway leading to the corridors, "What's all the shouting about?"

The Doctor's head whipped round to see Rose, standing there in her dressing gown; hair unkempt, and eyes a bleary brown. She held her fluffy white dressing gown close to her, and looked through her long eyelashes at the two men by the console, confusion and bewilderment evident on her face. The Doctor couldn't help noticing how much she lacked in her usual spark. Wouldn't she usually be a little annoyed about now, playfully scolding them both for waking her?

Mickey smiled fondly at Rose and walked over to her. "We weren't shouting," he told her, "just talkin'. You look exhausted, you should go back to bed."

Rose looked at Mickey, the corner of her mouth twitching upwards only lightly. "I'm up now, might as well get somethin' to eat," she mumbled. "I'm starvin'." She turned back around, and headed in the direction of the kitchen, not even glancing in the Doctor's direction.

He blinked. "Have I been missing something?" he asked Mickey, once Rose had disappeared.

"You can be a bit blind at times," Mickey affirmed with a nod.

"How long has she been ignoring me?" he asked quietly, slightly wide-eyed and incredulous.

"You haven't noticed at all?" Mickey shook his head.

"Well, yeah, I just assumed it was one of those phases, or moods, it's a big ship and she was always somewhere else, and…" he trailed off; all his reasons sounded a tad pathetic when said out loud. He supposed he just hadn't been paying proper attention. What an idiot.

Mickey's arms – which had untwined themselves when he went over to Rose – were tied back across his chest. "Right…" he drew out.

He turned sharply to the boy, "What's wrong with her?"

"I told you, I'm not –"

"Mickey," the Doctor interjected. "I'm not asking you I'm demanding you. Tell me what's wrong with her!" He took a stride towards him, with a heavy, angry frown. Mickey looked up at him, startled and with an odd look on his face. When the Doctor realised that odd look was fear he fell back slightly, realising he'd been sterner than he meant to. "I mean… just, tell me what you know," he said gently. "Please."

"Why do you care?" Mickey's brow furred, and he tilted his head to the side, slight confusion in his voice.

"Why do I –?" He stared in shock at Mickey for a moment. "_Why do I care?_ _Why **wouldn't** I care?!_ " he exclaimed heatedly. "It's Rose!"

Mickey shrugged, "_I_ care 'bout Rose… a lot actually. Bin with her all the time since I got here. _You_ and her 'ave barely said anythin' to each other for days and days now…"

"And you know the reason for that," the Doctor stated, placing his hand on the control panel.

Mickey nodded. "She told me," he said smugly.

"Well, tell _me!"_

Mickey shook his head, grinning in amusement. "An' I thought you were smart."

"I am smart, I can figure anything out!" he insisted.

"Figure her out then," said Mickey in the same insisting voice. The Doctor turned away from him, walking slowly around the control panel, his finger brushing the levers, and his eyes set on the floor. Mickey sighed, "I guess if you cared about her –"

"Stop saying that," the Doctor interrupted. "I care more than you know."

Mickey let out a snort, "C'mon Doctor. _I _ care, _he_ cared… but you…" He shook his head.

"What do you mean '_he_ '?" the Doctor said, confused. Was there someone else in this picture he was missing?

"Old big ears," Mickey said simply.

The Doctor frowned, "What are you talking about... I am '_old big ears_ '. Just with a new face." He paused for thought, "And new ears actually," He added, "…and new everything else."

"Yeah well," Mickey said. "To me, for one, you're two very different people."

"We're the same person."

"Not to me."

"Who asked you anyway?"

"You did."

The Doctor let out a noise that sounded like a snort. "I asked what's wrong with Rose, and you gave me bugger all in answer." He sighed and gave Mickey a meaningful look, "Please Mickey, if I know, I can start to make it better."

Mickey shuffled his feet uncomfortably for a moment. There was a moment of silence. "I promised," he finally mumbled.

"Ah," the Doctor heard himself say. Now it was staring to come together a little better. "You promised Rose you wouldn't tell me," he stated. "Then what's all this about? These… hints, trying to drive me mad with your gloating looks?"

"No," Mickey was defensive now. "I just hate seein' her mopin' all the time. You need to sort it out."

"I can if you tell me," the Doctor begged quietly.

Mickey shook his head, "Sorry, I promised. She'd kill me if she knew I was sayin' this as it is."

The Doctor shook his head, "Why would she think I don't care?" he muttered, more to himself than to Mickey. Then he turned quickly back to the boy. "I do assume she believes that too, as well as you?" he said sadly.

Mickey nodded in confirmation. He hesitated, before saying tentatively, "Half the things I've said… they came from her mouth Doctor."

The Timelord swallowed; he hadn't liked most the things Mickey had said. He hadn't liked all of it actually…

--Preview--

**Chapter II - Awkwardness **

_Rose shook her head violently. "No," she said firmly._

_It was a moment before the Doctor realised that, not only was she showing the first bit of emotion since he had entered the room, but that the emotion she showed was actually anger at the prospect of visiting Barcelona. Though why, he couldn't understand at all._


	2. Awkwardness

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating: ** K

**A.N:** Here's the second chapter... thank you for all the lovely reviews...

* * *

**Chapter II - Awkwardness **

"Rose?" said the Doctor hesitantly.

At first he thought she hadn't heard him. Then, when he repeated her name again and received no answer, he was sure she must have been ignoring him. It was only when he almost yelled it a forth time that she responded.

Her bed creaked as she turned to him, and he saw with slight relief that she hadn't been ignoring him at all, as she pulled out the two earplugs out of her ears, from the MP3 she had been listening to. She looked at him questioningly but didn't say anything as she waited.

"Um, how are you?" he asked, feeling at a strange loss for anything else to say.

"Okay… and how're you?"

Their words sounded oddly formal, like they had both somehow forgotten how to talk to each other.

"Good… I'm good."

"Good," she repeated, nodding.

There was a long, awkward silence.

Rose sat up on her bed, pulling her knees into her chest and bringing a tightening grip around them with her left hand, while her right hand idly pulled out cotton threads idly from her mattress.

The Doctor cleared his throat, his mind begging him to say _something_ ! Anything would do! They weren't that far gone, surely! "So…" he began. "We've been stuck on the Tardis a while. Where would you like to go next?"

Rose's eyes flickered up to him, "Why've we been stuck on the Tardis this long anyway?"

He didn't really want to answer that, but she was being responsive now, so surely she deserved an answer. How could he though?

Because he'd thought she needed time to break her odd, detached mood? Because he'd wanted a small break? Because he needed time to think about things… like how he lost people all the time?

Those wouldn't do.

"Um, well, I just thought I'd give our legs a rest from all that running we do." He laughed nervously.

"Oh," she whispered simply. For a long moment it looked like she was going to expand on that, but after several more seconds of silence passed the Doctor guessed she had given up on further talk.

"So, where would you liked to go then?" he asked, breaking another silence, and determined not to yet give up. "Jaraga's third moon maybe? Jaraga is an incredible planet, the sea literally _moves_ all across the land, making a full circle around the entire planet! And the third moon gives you a spectacular view of it! Breathtaking, honestly! Or… how about The Planet of the Trixon, 59th century? They do really nice banana milkshakes at that time. Really nice."

Rose just continued to stare at him in stony indifference.

"Or," he went on, still in no way intent on giving up. "Marki of the Plari – very humorous place, you'd love it. Or, hey, how about Barcelona?"

Rose's eyes darted sharply to the Doctor's at that last word. "Barcelona?" she repeated.

"That's the one! I said I'd take you at some point, didn't I?" The Doctor tried out an impish grin, triumph felt that he had finally gotten a response from her. "So, why don't we go now?"

Rose shook her head violently. "No," she said firmly.

It was a moment before the Doctor realised that, not only was she showing the first bit of emotion since he had entered the room, but the emotion she showed was actually anger at the prospect of visiting Barcelona. Though why, he couldn't understand at all.

"Oh," the Doctor's voice fell flat. He swallowed and watched Rose carefully, as her eyes fell back down to the bedcover she was slowly striping of thread. It was then that he decided on a different approach. "Rose…" he began hesitantly. "Are you alright?"

Her head bobbed up and down three times in confirmation, blond hair swaying against her shoulders, but she said nothing more.

"Only… things have seemed a bit…" he frowned and tried to think of the best way to continue. "Well, they've been a bit of a–"

"Finally! There you are!" Mickey walked into Rose's bedroom, and on seeing them, decided to interrupt the Doctor loudly – whether that was purposefully or not, the Timelord had no idea, he supposed not though. "I couldn't find you anywhere, I thought you'd left me alone in the Tardis!"

Rose scoffed, as she stood up and walked over to him, "As if!"

She gave him a huge, beaming smile – the first one the Doctor had seen on her in ages. Did she always smile at Mickey-the-Idiot like that? The Doctor tried hard not to let the infuriating jealousy, wringing around in his stomach, take over him.

"Not about to leave you by yourself, am I?" she said playfully to Mickey. "Who'd keep me company?" she teased, grabbing his hand. "Anyway, apparently we're goin' to some planet or somethin', so lets go to the console room, yeah?"

She headed off out of the room, dragging Mickey by the hand along with her. Mickey's face resembled something of an apologetic look before it disappeared around the door, into the corridor after her.

The Doctor stared after them for a moment; mouth slightly parted in broken wonder. _Who'd keep me company?_ …her words played over and over in his head tauntingly.

Finally, he blinked out of his stupor; right that's it, he decided. He had to find out what was going on in that delicate and complicated human brain of hers. Marching through the Tardis corridor towards the control room he heard the beautiful sound of Rose's laughter… he hadn't heard that laugh in what felt like eons. Or had he just not been listening?

In the console room Rose was leaning heavily against Mickey, her hair falling about his shoulder as she giggled happily at something he'd said. Mickey was laughing too, his arm around Rose's shoulder, eyes crinkled and watching her appreciatory. The Timelord tried hard, very hard, not to give in to the part of his brain telling him to pull Rose away from the boy and hold her tight against him forever.

He coughed lightly; partly to let them know he was there, and partly to cover the sounds of the roaring jealousy screaming in his ears.

"Doctor," Mickey acknowledged, whereas Rose just switched her face back to impassive, leaning her head against Mickey's shoulder. "Where to now then?"

"Um, well," the Doctor flew over to the control panel, grinning in his usual manner as best he could. "How about somewhere long ago, much before your time? The planet Scurgo, Two-hundred-and-twenty-five, Before-Lord?"

"Sounds good to me," said Mickey cheerful enough, though clearly not understanding a word that was just said.

"Okay then!" The Doctor went over to set the coordinates, and as the Tardis bumped into life, Rose clung to Mickey's arm for support. The Doctor held onto the centre column, just letting go when the Time machine finally came to a standstill. "Here we are!" he called, as jovially as he could manage – which wasn't really very much.

He walked quickly toward the Tardis door, Mickey and Rose just behind. Swinging the door open, trying not to think about the fact that the two humans behind him were holding hands, he found himself facing the barrel of a rather large gun.

"Ah," he said softly.

"Who the hell are you?" came a gruff voice from the other end of the weapon.

The Doctor poked his head round the gun, to meet the gaze of a short, dark haired man, dressed in armour. Looking around he noticed about half a dozen others of a similar dress, all pointing large guns at the three of them. "Um, hello!" the Timelord said cheerfully.

The man's eyes narrowed and he clicked off the safety of his gun, "I asked who you are!"

"Yes," said the Doctor, quickly raising his hands. He sensed Rose and Mickey do the same behind him. "Yes, you did!" He took one of his hands to his coat pocket, "Can I just…?" he pointed to his pocket hesitantly, and the man nodded grudgingly. He dug in his hand and pulled out the psychic paper, "Here we are!" He showed it to the man with a bright smile.

Immediately the man's facial features changed, and he lowered his gun. "Oh, beg your pardon. You must forgive us, difficult times. Can't know who to and who not to trust, you understand."

"Of course, of course," the Doctor nodded, putting the paper back in his pocket. "Because the paper said…?" he gave a questioning look, beginning to wish he'd announced who he was before showing the paper, rather than leaving it entirely up to fate.

"That you're the new recruits," said the man, slightly confused.

"Right, right," the Doctor nodded; then a look of confusion took over as he was handed one of the large guns that had moments before been pointed at him. He turned to see Rose and Mickey being handed similar weapons; Mickey looked at his in amazement, feeling his hands around it and gazing incredulously; Rose stared at hers in bewilderment. The Doctor handed his own back to the soldier in front of him. "No thanks."

"No?" the soldier repeated.

"No, thank you," said the Doctor. "I don't carry a gun."

The armed man laughed, "Don't carry a gun, soldier?"

The Doctor stared for a moment, and as he did the sounds outside their conversation caught his ears. They were standing in a large flat area of grassy mud land, with nothing larger than trees and the Tardis by them, but at a not-so-far distance, the sounds of guns firing could be heard, the shouts and screams of hundreds of people, bombing and explosions...

"Soldiers!" the Doctor cried suddenly. He stared wide-eyed at the man. "You think we're soldiers for the war…?" His eyes grew wider. "No! No, no, no, no!" He backed off slightly, his back connecting with someone who could either be Rose or Mickey.

The soldier's eyes narrowed, "No?"

"No, we're not soldiers," the Doctor said quickly.

"Doctor!" He heard an angry hiss from behind him, coming from Rose. Well, at least she was talking to him, he mused.

The guns were pointed towards them again. "Put them guns down!" the man told Rose and Mickey, and they had no choice but to do so quickly. "What's that blue box behind you?" he added to the Doctor.

"Uh…" the Doctor had to raise his hands again, turning toward the Tardis he moved one hand towards his ear and pulled on it lightly. "Look, I think we got off on the wrong foot here, and –"

He was cut short as a soldier grabbed his arm tightly. "Shut up."

The Doctor, Rose and Mickey backed away as the soldiers advanced.

--Preview--

**Chapter III - Truth and Lies **

_"I was trying to protect you!" he yelled, leaping up from the floor, he glared down at her as he stood._

_Rose's head lifted from Mickey's chest, "Oh yeah, and a fine job you did of that! Now we're stuck in here with no way out!" Her stony mask of indifference had gone, her energy fuelled entirely through anger. "You were better off when you didn't bother!"_


	3. Truth and Lies

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K

**_A.N:_ ** Sorry, but... this is just slightly shorter than the other chapters. Thank you for all the reviews very much.

* * *

**Chapter III - Truth and Lies **

"I'm sorry."

The whispered words echoed slightly in such a small confinement. But even repeated throughout the cell, they would earn no answer.

"I didn't think…" he continued. "I was only trying to protect us all. How was I to know we'd end up here?"

The Doctor was on his knees next to Mickey and Rose, where they sat on the damp floor. They were both silent though, and Rose wasn't even looking at him. Mickey on the other hand, was watching the Doctor intently; looking on at him in hard anger and annoyance. They clearly both blamed him. Rose was perched under Mickey's arm as they leaned against the cell wall, her head against his chest, and staring at the ground. Unlike Mickey, she didn't look angry, her face appeared void of all emotion.

"Don't think much, do you?"

It hurt more because it came from Rose, not Mickey, and was in a voice that was flat and dead.

He stared at her impassive face for a moment. "I'm sorry," he said, very quietly, for the twelfth time in ten minutes.

Neither Mickey nor Rose gave any sign that they had heard him, nor did they move. They stayed still where they were, in each other's arms, against the grimy prison cell wall. The dim light from the gas light above their heads set a short glow on the right side of their faces, paling Rose in particular in contrast with the dark brown wall they were leaning against. Their faces were hard and as still as the concrete behind them, like they had been carved, as one, from stone.

It made the Doctor feel lonelier than ever.

"Haven't you got the sonic screwdriver?" Mickey asked, but he wasn't looking in the Doctor's direction anymore, his eyes were fixed on the floor like Rose's, and his lips barely moved. His voice was stiff, and almost as blank as Rose's.

The Doctor hesitated; he had been hoping that question wouldn't come up. He sensed an oportunately here, just the three of them, no way out. And all they could do was talk. He'd already swore to himself he would find out what was wrong with Rose, and here it was... the perfect oportunatey. He wasn't about to let it go to waste. He'd get them out in time, for now though, there were other, seemingly more important things, which were pressed against his mind so hard it made him feel a dim ache brewing there.

"No," he lied quietly. "I think one of the soldiers must have taken it."

Mickey breathed heavily out through his nose, but said nothinng, as Rose's brow furred together just slightly, but she too gave no responce.

The Doctor fell back and sat beside Mickey, though not close enough to touch the boy. His back pressed against the wall, he took back his head so it touched the concrete and stared at the ceiling for a moment. He then closed his eyes slowly to decrease the pain he felt coming along in his head. "I just didn't want us all to end up dying on a battlefield, " he heard himself say, as he stared at the darkness at the back of his own eyelids, the blackness numbing him.

"Better to die in here, is it?" Rose's voice stung his ears.

His eyes shot open in sudden anger.

"I was trying to protect you!" he yelled, leaping up from the floor, he glared down at her as he stood.

Rose's head lifted from Mickey's chest, "Oh yeah, and a fine job you did of that! Now we're stuck in here with no way out!" Her stony mask of indifference had gone, her energy fuelled entirely through anger. "You were better off when you didn't bother!"

"Wha -? Didn't bother -?" the Doctor spluttered. His fists clenched in absolute outrage. "I _always_ bother! I _always_ try to protect you!"

Rose snorted. She turned to an uncomfortable Mickey, whose eyes were on the Doctor's feet. "Look Mickey, more lies."

"Lies?" The Doctor shook his head incredulously, feeling his jaw clench, "Just what the hell is going on inside your head Rose Tyler? Because I have _never_ lied to you!"

"Liar!" she shouted. She untwined herself from Mickey's arms, letting go of their stoney illusion, and stood up to face the Doctor.

"When have I ever lied to you?!" The Doctor waved his hands in anger, his eyes becoming dangerously blacker by the second.

"You don't know?" Rose was laughing disbelievingly.

"No!" he yelled in angry annoyance.

"Don't pay much attention then, do you?" she spat.

"So enlighten me." He stared at her, furious.

"You said you wouldn't _leave _ me!" she shouted.

There was a long silence, as the echo of her shout vibrated around the room.

The only other sound was the dripping of water from some pipes not far from their cell.

Mickey was staring at the Doctor in shock, waiting for his reaction.

Rose was also staring at the Doctor, both shocked at her own outburst, and angry all the more.

The Doctor was staring at Rose. "What?" he whispered. All anger seemed to have disaperated from him, leaving his eyes wide and confused.

Rose swallowed hard, a visible lump falling down her throat. Her lip quivered, and she shook her head, trying to gather her bearings. She took a deep breath and blinked several times.

"I asked you if you were just goin' to leave me behind, like you did to Sarah-Jane," she looked at him, eyes shining with tears she was determined not to let fall, "You said no, Doctor," her voice cracked on the last two words. "_'Not you'._ They're your words." She swallowed the lump in her throat again. A lone tear streaked down her left cheek, black from her heavy eye makeup, but she wiped it quickly without thought, before continuing, "You left us Doctor… less than twenty four hours later. You left us… believin' you'd never be able to come back. You left me behind when you said you wouldn't."

The Doctor face crumpled, as he realised how true what she was saying really was. "I was…" he struggled. "I never meant…" His shoulders slumped; eyes now turned a misty brown. "There was no time," he finally whispered.

Rose took a deep breath. "But it's not just that…" she shook her head, "I don't know you anymore Doctor. I thought I did… in your old self," she swallowed hard, her brow furred. She closed her eyes, and when they pricked back open all evidence of tears behind them had gone, they had hardened under the thoughts on her mind, "I don't though, not anymore."

"Rose…" he whispered.

She shook her head again. "Never mind know you though... I'm not even sure I like you anymore, Doctor. Sometimes, it's so hard to like you when you..." she trailed off, shaking her head and staring at him, begging him to understand.

The Doctor's face was one of shock, and utter desolation as he stared helplessly at her.

"I don't know if…" she breathed in heavily through her nose, jaw gritted together in grim determination. "I don't know if I can do this anymore. I don't know if I can travel with you anymore… everything's just changed so much. Too much."

One of the Doctor's hearts dropped down to his feet, as the other came up and choked his throat. He felt utterly helpess, utterly alone, and so overcome by guilt, so miserable it made his eyes sting.

For several long minutes the Doctor and Rose just stared at one another. Mickey was still sat, forgotten at the base of the wall, eyeing them both with deep regret.

Rose finally broke their tied gaze. Looking away from the Doctor, to something over his shoulder, she stared at a place behind him for a moment. Taking a deep breath, she spoke, her tone suddenly becoming formal, businesslike, and as flat as it was before their argument; "There's a large crack over there, in that wall. I reckon it's a weak point in the buildin'. The building work looks a bit shabby if you ask me. If we hit it hard enough, I think it'll break. Don't you think Mickey?"

Mickey stood up immediately, and went over to the wall Rose was indicating. "She's right," he announced. "If we put enough force here, it should budge, I think." He was bent over by the wall, his fingers tracing the rough building work carefully. "The walls don't look like they've been very well built, do they? We could break this easy and get outa here."

The Doctor barely heard him.

He was still staring at Rose, his mouth open in shock, in disbelief and horror, as she walked around him, out of his eyesight, towards Mickey.

The Doctor stared at the empty spot where she had just been stood, and tried to imagine her always gone.

It was right then, that one by one, he felt his hearts break.

--Preview--

**Chapter IV - A Little Trust **

_He led them deeper, not uttering a word, and simply impatient to find the Tardis. Mickey bit his lip, whereas Rose's face remained straight and resigned. Mickey increased his speed slightly, so he was marching beside the Timelord. "Isn't this a bit dangerous? Walkin' through here?" he asked innocently._

_"Not if you stay close," the Doctor replied, his voice and face not giving off any sign of emotion. "If you can bare that of course."_


	4. A Little Trust

**When There's No Trust **.

**Chapter Rating: **K

**A.N:** Sorry, it's a little later than the others were posted. But it's also a little longer.

* * *

**Chapter IV - A Little Trust **

"Help us Doctor!" yelled Mickey, from over by the wall.

For a long moment the Doctor didn't move. He just continued to stare, with his lips quivering slightly, at the space Rose had vacated. Then he blinked, and came into action.

Mickey was mindlessly shoving his body against the wall to no avail whatsoever.

The Doctor took out his sonic screwdriver from his pocket and waltzed away from Mickey and Rose, to the door.

Rose's eyes widened in shock at the sight of the screwdriver in his hand. "You told us you didn't have the damn sonic screwdriver!" All impassiveness gone, Rose was staring at him in absolute outrage.

The Doctor said nothing, choosing to ignore her for now. Yes, he had told them he didn't have it; simply so he could find a way to get Rose to talk him… and it had worked, with more things said than he wanted to hear.

The Doctor pointed the sonic screwdriver at the door lock, and heard the satisfied click as it opened in seconds. He shoved the sonic back in his pocket and put his hand on the door handle. "Wait a minute," said Mickey, walking over to him quickly with a heavy frown. "Won't there be guards out there?"

The Doctor just shrugged. "Could be," he said shortly, and he swung the door open, out of the jail cell in seconds. Mickey and Rose were out beside him a moment later, staring around at the landscape.

They were outside in a rather bleak field; the heavy clouds overhead indicated rainfall pretty soon; the only building was the small grimy prison building they had just left. As far as they could all tell there was no sign of any guards keeping watch on them.

Trees surrounded the muddy field, enclosing the clearing as a rather ugly meadow. There was a terrible, constant sound vibrating around the area, of raised voices and the heavy cracks of gunshots – the war.

The Doctor's eyes scanned the field for any sign of the Tardis, but he was soon shaking his head, "This isn't the field we landed in." He frowned and tried to think back to their capture, unfortunately though they had all been knocked out unconscious by the soldiers, only to wake up in the filthy prison cell. They had no way of knowing how much time it had taken to travel from the Tardis to the jail behind them.

He sighed and grabbed the sonic screwdriver back from his pocket. After pressing a couple buttons on it for a moment he stared at its blue light, and then his head shot up toward the forest to his right. "Tardis is this way," he said briskly, setting off in the direction of the trees.

Rose and Mickey followed just behind, jogging slightly to keep up with the Timelord as he took a fast walk ahead, eager to get to his ship. When they entered the forest, their eyes had to take a moment to adjust to the sudden loss of light; the cropped leaves above set out a dark blanket over the woods. Nonetheless, the Doctor was quick to find a trail and strode ahead quietly, listening to the sharp calls of birds above their heads and the wind bristling against the leaves.

He led them deeper, not uttering a word, and simply impatient to find the Tardis. Mickey bit his lip nervously, whereas Rose's face remained straight and resigned. Mickey increased his speed slightly, so he was marching beside the Timelord. "Isn't this a bit dangerous? Walkin' through here?" he asked innocently.

"Not if you stay close," the Doctor replied, his voice and face not giving off any sign of emotion. "If you can bear that of course."

Mickey had a feeling that that last sentence was directed more at Rose than himself.

He didn't reply and they continued ahead in silence for a while. The Doctor was ahead of them both again, and Mickey hung back beside Rose. He was watching her face anxiously. She hadn't said a word since her anger about the screwdriver, and he couldn't help wondering what was going through her head.

"You okay?" he whispered to her. He said it quietly, readily aware of the Doctor in front of them, but realised immediately after that there was really no need; his hearing was much more sensitive than humans so whispering could hardly help.

She gave him a curt nod, but said nothing more, her eyes set out in front, feet crunching hard on the twigs beneath her as they walked on.

Mickey gave up, knowing there would be no point persisting her when she was in this sort of mood. They continued to walk onward. The atmosphere was heavy, the silence of their voices screaming to each one of them, but no one dared break it. The only sound was the quiet voice of the forest, as the wildlife around them rustled softly in the region of them.

However, that soon changed as they walked further into the forest. Soon the soft, but terrible, sounds of the war could be heard again. An ongoing, dull throbbing vibration of bangs and yells coming from right where they were headed.

Before long the trees became less dense, and the air more bright. Up ahead an opening to a clearing could be seen, and with it, the sounds of the war became louder. Very suddenly, the Doctor stopped in his tracks, causing Mickey and Rose to almost bump into him. He turned to them, brow wired together in worry.

"The war is just out there," he told them. "But so is the Tardis apparently. I want you both to stay by me. I'll find the Tardis and get us into it, but _please_ do as I say…" He glanced at Rose more often than was needed, until finally his gaze settled on her, and he swallowed before telling her firmly, "You have to trust me here. Just for this if you like, but you _need_ to trust me on this one. Trust my judgment."

There was a pause, until she grudgingly gave one single nod of agreement, face impassive. He nodded back, turned back toward the opening, and walked slowly toward it with Mickey and Rose a foot behind. When they had branched through the trees they came out into a field similar to the one they had just left. The difference, however, was that most of the grassy field was out of sight to them, due to the large wall cropped up by them.

Around ten meters from them there was a hustle of many soldiers in similar dress to the ones that had locked them up earlier that day. They were hidden behind the large concrete wall, which stood heavy and long, across from one side of the field by the trees where the Doctor was standing, to the other side of the clearing. Guns of any sizes were pointed over the wall, the sound of the firing deafening. Though, from this angle it was impossible for the Doctor, and the two humans behind him, to see whom the soldiers were firing at.

The Doctor searched the crowd of busy soldiers for the familiar sight of his blue box, but he saw nothing. He was still scanning the area when a massive explosion racked his eardrums, causing him to go momentarily deaf. The earth shook beneath them, and the calls and yells of the soldiers by the wall several meters from alerted the Doctor. He grabbed his companions by their arms and ran further through the muddy field, along the wall as he searched desperately for that colour of brightest blue…

The soldiers either didn't notice them, or couldn't pay them any attention. The earth shook again, and the Doctor became very aware of the explosions going on in very close proximity to them. Then his eyes fell upon something by the trees. It was almost hidden, and looked close to abandonment. He ran over to it, dragging Mickey and Rose along with him. The sound of guns and bombing rattled his ears, but he tried not to listen as his eyes fell upon the bomb shelter in front of them.

It was metallic, but so covered by the trees, and so overgrown, it looked almost totally green in colour. Wasting no time for explanations the Doctor opened the door and pushed Mickey and Rose inside, slamming the door shut behind him with a force that vibrated the confinement slightly.

He turned to Mickey and Rose, glancing around enough to see that they were in a small, well-lit room, with two bunk beds, a sink, and a few cupboards. Not exactly five star, but it would do.

"What're we doin' in here?" Mickey asked incredulously.

"There's a war outside," the Doctor informed them both, as if they didn't already know.

"Yeah, I saw that," the boy said with a hint of annoyance. "But I thought we were goin' back to the Tardis?"

"We were," the Doctor said calmly. He addressed them both, although it almost appeared that Rose wasn't really listening. "But it's far too dangerous for that now. The Tardis is in the middle of it all, in between the walls each side hides behind. No Man's Land. The dead space in between, where there's nothing but bullets and bombs."

"Won't the Tardis be blown up then?" Mickey asked, horrified.

The Doctor frowned at him, "Of course not. She wouldn't be the best ship in the universe if a few men in fancy leather could hurt her, would she? Besides the guns those soldiers have are useless... only thing they can do is murder, can only break through flesh, and those bombs aren't much better."

"Yeah, but –"

The Doctor interjected, "Mickey, trust me. The Tardis is fine."

"Won't the soldiers notice us in here?"

"Nope," the Doctor replied calmly. "Abandoned it seems. I don't think they sleep on the battle field anymore anyway…" he trailed off, frowning slightly.

"But when're we getting' out then? Don't tell me we're gonna have wait until the war's over," Mickey's eyebrows rose.

The Doctor went over and sat on the bottom bunk of one of the beds. He sighed, "It usually quietens down at night. In fact, they stop completely at night."

"So, we're waitin' here until tonight to get back to the Tardis?" Mickey asked calmly.

He leant against the bed opposite the Doctor, and folded his arms. Rose sat on the floor by the door, away from the two men, in stony silence. Her knees pushed against her chest, watching them as though they were a mildly interesting television show.

The Doctor hesitated for a moment. "Not exactly," he finally said quietly. He ran his hand through his hair, he sighed, and looked at Mickey meaningfully, "I'm going to bring the Tardis here tonight."

Rose's ears pricked up, and her heartbeat increased as she sensed the danger in this, but she voiced none of this.

"What? Why?" Mickey shook his head, disbelievingly.

"There's a reason the they don't fight at night." The Doctor sighed heavily, "There's something out there, something in the shadows. We came in the midst of a war, with a beast in the forest that kills at night… I didn't mean to land in this time, of course," he quickly added. "Just… out by a bit, I was, I suppose." He stood up then, facing Mickey, and glancing at Rose every now and then. "Anyway, you two will stay here tonight, I'll find the Tardis, bring it back here, and hey presto!" He grinned, as if it was the easiest plan in the world.

"What?" The whisper came from Rose.

The Doctor looked around at her, slightly surprised, and trying hard not to let any emotions run away with him as he watched her eyes widen. "Hmm?" he enquired.

"You're –" she stared at him. "You're goin' out there, at night… when there's that – that thing… that beast, you said..."

"Well, yes," he admitted.

"And me 'n' Mickey aren't goin'?" she asked quietly.

He frowned, "Oh no. You'll be safe here." His tone implied that that was the conversation finished. He sat back down on the bed again, and began fishing in his pocket for something, slight frown as he failed to retrieve it, but seeming at ease.

"You can't." It was another whisper. She was stood now, her arms held limp and almost in defeat at her side, her face looking pale in the light in contrast against her heavy eye make up.

The Doctor frowned at her, raising an eyebrow, "Sorry?"

"We'll go too."

"No, you won't." He was firm. His words were definite.

"But you can't," Rose's voice rose.

He pulled a banana out of his pocket, which had apparently been the thing he had been looking for, only to hesitate and place it back in his jacket again a second later, before sighing gently. "Rose, it's already decided."

"You can't tell me what to do," she insisted. Her voice was slightly caught in her throat, and the Doctor wasn't entirely sure why. He didn't think she cared…

He walked up to her, placing his hand on her shoulder and feeling gratitude that she didn't throw it off. "You said you'd trust me," he reminded her. His brown eyes found hers; she stared up at him, and he saw the fear there in her eyes. He tried a hesitant and gentle smile. "I need you to trust me now."

Her voice was strangled in her throat, "What if you don't come back?"

He stared at her. And then it hit him; she couldn't trust him. He closed his eyes for a moment, waiting for the wave of pain to pass, then opened them again to face her. All he could do was try and make her see… "I will," he insisted. "I swear I will, no lies. I will, Rose. I will come back."

"That beast…" she began hesitantly. "In the forest…"

"It won't get here," he said firmly.

She shook her head, "But what about you, Doctor…? What if it gets you...?"

He frowned; he wasn't prepared to hold onto the hope that she still cared a little. She was baffling, that was for sure. He didn't understand… and he wished he knew what she was thinking. "I'll be okay," he said surely. He gave her one last smile and turned back to the bed, leaving her staring after him.

--Preview--

**Chapter V - Darkness **

_She looked up at him, with a small bitter smile. "Now, I know how it feels," she mumbled. "To be left behind by the person you thought you could trust, so they can disappear with someone better than you."_

_"Not that different," Mickey agreed._

_Rose nodded. "Irony," she laughed bitterly, "Or maybe just fate's way of getting back at me."_


	5. Darkness

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating: ** K

**A.N:** Just like to thank everyone for all the reviews. They mean a lot.

* * *

**Chapter V - Darkness **

The door to the abandoned bomb shelter creaked just slightly as it opened a notch, and a single brown eye peeped through the gap from inside. As the eye saw no one about – the silence long and rather abrupt when expecting the cries of war – the door opened several more notches, and the Doctor stepped out onto the wet grass.

The soldiers had disappeared, and the sky was black, with only a few sprinkles of distant stars filling the dark space. The bland grassy area was empty; the wall, some twenty meters in front of him, stood still and black, with the area by it totally deserted. Rose and Mickey stepped out after him; Mickey with confidence, and Rose pale and hesitant.

The Doctor turned to them, "Alright, I'll be back as soon as possible. In fact I'll probably be back in minutes. I'll try and set the coordinates of the Tardis for this minute or somewhere about, okay?"

Mickey gave a definite nod, and leaned against the doorframe. "You got it, boss."

Rose was staring at the Doctor with sombre face, "I don't understand why we can't come."

"It's dangerous, Rose," the Doctor replied firmly.

"So?" she whispered in reply, a little harsh.

"So, you're not going. Either of you, and that's that."

"What about you though?" Mickey asked. "If this beast-thing gets you…?"

"It won't," the Doctor stated.

"It might," Rose croaked quietly.

He looked at her. "No, it won't," he repeated, callous in annoyance this time. "I'm a Timelord."

"So, that makes you immune?" Mickey smirked, with an eyebrow raised.

"No," Rose said, with deepening frown. "It makes him stubborn." She swallowed hard, "Don't do this."

The Doctor stepped forward so he was directly in front of her. He stared at her pale face, and looked into her eyes. "I will come back, Rose. I will, I promise." He hoped everything between them… the unsaid things, the betrayal, the lies, the hurt… he hoped it could all be put to one side, just for this, because he knew she needed to trust him for this. She had to.

She nodded, and her eyes blinked closed, opening on the grass beneath her.

"I won't be a minute," he said, and with that he ran from them, toward the forest.

Rose watched his retreating steps, until he had totally disappeared into the night. She stood, facing the way he had left, her lips straight, and her face felt heavy. Her arms were limp, though she wanted to wrap them round her body from the cold that was creeping up through her. She swallowed, and her lips trembled as the seconds passed. She waited five and half minutes, before giving a single knowing nod, and turned back into the bomb shelter.

Mickey watched her go inside sadly. He looked around the deserted, dark landscape, as a drop of water fell on his forehead.

The dull beat of a thousand raindrops beat on the metal roof, as he too withdrew back inside their bomb shelter.

--

The Doctor felt a grumble of annoyance escape him, as a rumble of thunder above his head signalled only the start of the storm ahead. The rain continued to pour, soaking his pinstriped suit through. Even with the above canopies of the trees, the rain still managed to leach through, and with the howling winds ruffling the leaves hard, water threw down on him harder than ever.

Still, he jogged on, knowing exactly where he was headed. It was very dark in the trees and, if he didn't have the heightened sight of a Timelord, he would probably not be able to see the hand in front of his face. Luckily he knew exactly were he was going, and it wasn't long before he sensed the trees thinning out to his right. No doubt the clearing in between the two towering walls, where the soldiers of each side hid behind, was in close proximity.

As he treaded on though, a rustling in the bushes nearby pricked his ears. His body stiffened, but he walked on, though quieter than before, and more alert. His head span round the area, eyes scanning for any sign of movement. He saw none, though his speed quickened slightly. His heart beats in rhythm with his fast pace.

Eventually, to his relief, he came out at the clearing. And there stood his ship; blue and tall in the middle of the muddy meadow. Waiting for him. He smiled, and jogged over to her. Even in the present situation – Rose hating him, and a giant beast out somewhere in the woods – he was still comforted by his constant companion. He took his key from his pocket and inserted into the lock quickly. He rushed inside, gave his ship one more smile, and ran over to the console. Now to bring Rose home. Though whether that was here, or her mother's flat…

His smile faded at that thought and his face remained sombre as he set in the coordinates.

--

"Are we gonna be waitin' here five and a half hours again?"

Mickey's question seemed to prod at her chest, and she wasn't sure how to answer it.

"No," she replied after a pause.

Mickey made something like a snort and leaned back against the pillow cropped up behind his head, as he laid on the bed. "He's takin' his time."

Rose didn't reply to that. She turned to him, frown in place, biting her lip. He didn't notice, closing his eyes, knees bent, with his feet on the bed. "Mickey?"

"Hmm?" he mumbled.

Rose walked over and stood by the bed, her hand on the metal railing. "Can I talk to you?"

His eyes flickered open, sensing her apprehension. "Sure Rose, anythin'."

"I'm sorry," she said, rather abruptly.

"What? What for?" Mickey stared at her in confusion.

She shook her head. "Everythin'. I haven't exactly been the best friend to you. An' I certainly wasn't the best girlfriend."

Mickey gave a reassuring smile and sat up on the bed, he leaned his elbows against his knees, looking at her curiously with searching brown eyes. "Don't be stupid Rose. You were a great girlfriend. And you're the best friend."

She shook her head again; "I dumped you without even tellin' you Mickey. I gave you a kiss on the head, thanked you for nothin', and ran off with some stranger for what you thought was a whole year."

Mickey smiled sheepishly, "Yeah… but it was the Doctor."

Rose sat down next to him, her hands idly picked at the thread of the mattress out of a habit. There was a soft drumming on the roof from above them as the storm raged outside. "I didn't even know him then. It was no excuse Mickey, and I am so, so sorry… how I must of made you feel..."

She stared blankly ahead for a moment, clearly horrified at those thoughts.

Mickey put his arm around her shoulders, "Rose, forget 'bout it, it's in the past. I'm over that now."

She looked up at him, with a small bitter smile. "Now, I know how it feels," she mumbled. "To be left behind by the person you thought you could trust, so they can disappear with someone better than you."

"Not that different," Mickey agreed.

Rose nodded. "Irony," she laughed bitterly, "Or maybe just fate's way of getting back at me." But she looked back up at him sharply, "But he isn't, mind. The Doctor isn't better than you."

Mickey smiled, "Reniette wasn't better than you."

Rose snorted, "Yeah right." Her sarcasm was evident.

"She wasn't," he insisted.

There was a long pause where Rose didn't give any reply to his statement. Instead she stood up suddenly. "Come on," she said, businesslike. She walked across the room toward the door, the dim flickering light above, sending shadows over her face.

"Where're we goin'?" Mickey asked, standing slowly and eyeing Rose apprehensively.

"To look for the Doctor."

"He said to stay here," Mickey mumbled.

"Yeah, and when has that ever stopped me?" she tried a cocky smile at him. Seeing his resigned look, she sighed and her eyebrows rose up at him. "C'mon Mickey, you know now he isn't coming back, he said he'd be a few minutes… it's been more than half an hour. He could be in trouble for all we know."

She opened the door, and the rain splashed soft droplets onto her face, even only stood in the doorway. The darkness outside looked daunting, and constant. Rose looked out at it, her teeth biting the bottom of her lip slightly; it was darker than before, much darker. The forest in which the Doctor had disappeared looked even blacker than the sky, the canopies of the trees giving out illusions of distant dark movement, of clawing creatures waiting in the black trees.

Shaking out a small wave of fear, Rose let none of this dampen her decision to find the Doctor. She turned her head, surprised to see that Mickey was right beside her now. She gave him a hesitant, but reassuring smile as he eyed the darkness outside with clear fear. She steeped out into the night, shivering slightly as the wave of raindrops flashed down on her bear arms.

"C'mon," she tried lightly, as Mickey stood in the doorway, looking up at the darkness above… the stars seemed to have totally disappeared.

"Rose," he said gently, bring his head down to look at her with his forehead creased. "I don't think we'd be able to see each other in this, never mind the Doctor."

"We'll hear him," Rose insisted. He looked ready to protest, but she cut him off before he could start, a little harsher in her tone. "We can't leave him Mickey. He could be out there, and what if he's hurt or something!"

Mickey didn't move though, trying to reason, "But, he's the Doctor; doesn't hurt easily, does he?"

Rose stared at him for a moment, before replying quietly, "He's not superman, Mickey. He's not perfect. He's not invincible. He can hurt just like the rest of us."

Mickey watched her for a moment; her face was illuminated only by the soft glow coming from the bomb shelter, eerie shadows flickering over her face and in her wide eyes; he could see the determination there. If he persisted her, he would lose. He sighed and stepped out into the night, "Okay, let's go then."

Rose gave him a smile as he slammed the bomb shelter door shut, leaving the darkness to consume them with the cracking bang, before its complete silence drummed their ears, and they headed toward the forest.

--Preview--

**Chapter VI - Distant Growls **

_"You… I mean are you… jealous?"_

_"Mickey," it was almost like a warning._

_"Are you?" he persisted._


	6. Distant Growl

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating: ** K+

**A.N:** Thanks to everyone... every review is much apreciated.

* * *

**Chapter VI - Distant Growls **

The black illusion of the leaves rustled against the wind that whistled softly. The darker branches and tall trunks had a sharp, sinister, deep black appearance to them. Rose and Mickey were walking quietly through the trees, with the crunch of leaves, the heavy rain on their faces – soaking them completely – and their quickened breaths the only sound in the darkness.

Every now and then the quiet would be broken sharply by the distant crack of thunder from above, or the loud cry of the Doctor's name from Rose's mouth, as they delved deeper into the forest.

Their hands were linked, so they could feel each other's palms even if it was becoming increasingly difficult to see one another's faces.

"He could be back at the shelter right now, you know," Mickey murmured quietly. He could see she was becoming increasingly more frustrated; her hand was hot and sweaty; her breaths uneven; and her calls out to the Doctor were strained. "Maybe we should turn back," he told her, louder now. "We barely even know where we're goin'. Do you even know how to get back?"

"I know the way we came," Rose's quiet, cracked reply came. "And I know where we're goin'."

"Rose," he muttered, almost pleadingly.

She didn't reply.

He groaned in frustration, "I swear this is one of the most stupid –"

"What do you want me to do, Mickey?" Rose cut in shortly, her head whipping in his direction. "I can't just go back and – and _sit _ there! He could be hurt. He might need our help."

Mickey didn't reply, dejected, and they walked on. There was a rather long silence, save the steady beat of the rain brushing through the forest above them and their soft footfalls as the ground crunched beneath them. Mickey eyed Rose through darkness, though failing to see anything other than her shaking outline.

"You don't trust him, do you?" Mickey mused out loud after a while.

Rose's eyes darted to him, and she swallowed though he couldn't see. There was another long silence as they walked on, the trees coming closer at either side of them. Mickey shrugged eventually; clearly she wasn't going to answer. He stared ahead, trying to see through the darkness, wondering if they really were heading the right way, as Rose had said.

"No," she finally whispered.

He looked around at her. It had been so quiet he wasn't entirely sure he imagined the word. "No?" he repeated.

"No," she echoed.

She swallowed hard, and let out another loud cry of the Doctor's name, listening afterwards for any reply that might come back. There was a long pause, but all that gave response was the distant rumble of thunder. A forked flash of light from above briefly illuminated the pained features on her face before disappearing and casting darkness around them once more.

"I want to," she voiced quietly. "But… I can't."

Mickey frowned, and though she couldn't see it, the confusion was evident in his voice. "Why?"

Rose swallowed, "Why what?"

"Why can't you trust him?" he asked. Rose sighed, but before she began to explain he quickly put in, "I mean, yeah, I know there was that whole thing with Reniette, but it's not like you two were ever… I mean you said he wasn't your boyfriend."

"He's not. Never was."

"Then… why, well why…?" he bit his lip, struggling slightly. "You… I mean are you… jealous?"

"Mickey," it was almost like a warning.

"Are you?" he persisted, his eyebrows high, and the beginnings of a smirk that shouldn't be there on his face.

She sighed, raising her head back and looking at the deep black of the sky through the hanging canopy branches. "No," she finally said firmly. "Not really." She hesitated slightly, her teeth nibbling on her bottom lip before continuing, still gazing up at the blackness above. "I thought I would be. I was… with Sarah Jane I guess – at the start anyway. But with Reniette… it wasn't just jealousy… it was more of the fact that he picked her over me I guess. Just that he'd rather be with her… and I'm not talkin' about romantically much either, just... " She gave another sigh and, realising she wasn't putting it in very good words, she gave up.

"Sounds like jealousy to me," Mickey admitted in a certified voice, after a moment.

Rose's shoulder's slumped in surrender. "Yeah… maybe it is. I dunno; it's hard to explain." Her brow furred deeply for a moment, before she lowered her head and looked round at Mickey, continuing slowly, with emphsis on each word, "It's just like; he would risk _my_ life like that, without a thought, whereas I would do _anythin_ ' to save _his_ ."

Mickey looked back at her; he couldn't help noticing the present tense she'd used. He smiled; clearly things weren't so far gone then. There was another distant rumble of thunder before he said quietly, "He didn't risk your life."

"Mickey," she murmured softly, but in a tone she might use to explain that two plus two equals four. "He abandoned us on a spaceship several centuries in our future with a load of mental clockwork robots who wanted to open up our heads to mend their ship."

Mickey winced slightly at the memory, and squeezed Rose's hand a little tighter as she stared hard at the floor. "He came back," he pointed out.

Rose looked up and took a heavy breath. "Pure luck," she affirmed in a final manner, letting Mickey know it was near the end of the conversation.

"So," Mickey said thoughtfully, "You don't trust him… but you don't hate him..."

Rose smiled though he couldn't see. "And he says your stupid," she teased. "Well done, not one damaged brain cell I hope." She swung his hand swiftly to let him know she was joking.

"Oi," he pushed her arm with his hand that wasn't entwined with hers, and grinned.

Rose shoved him back, before letting her smile fade slightly and exclaiming another loud call of the Doctor's name. She sighed when no reply came back, and turned sharply left, trying to make her eyes as wide as possible, but still unable to see much at all through the darkness.

Just as she was biting her lip, pulling forward a little faster, and checking for any sign of movement ahead, she felt Mickey stiffen beside her.

She turned to him, watching his outline in the dark as his breathing increased, his hand squeezed tighter against hers. He was very still. "Mickey, what is it?"

"You hear that?" he whispered.

Rose's ears pricked up as her and Mickey stilled to a stop, the rain continued to pour, falling on their already soaked faces. At first there was a nothing but a rumble of thunder from above and the distant hooting of an owl, then she heard it; a rustling of leaves coming from their right.

Her eyes darted to the place it had come. All she could see was the black contorted movements, shaking the leaves. Her breath caught as she heard a low per-longed, haggard growl. She backed away instinctively, her heart pounding madly in her chest. Mickey brought her away further, his breathing just as hallow.

As the low growl grew louder, Mickey dragged her back, almost pulling her over in the process. Finding her feet, she did the only thing she knew in this sort of situation; pulling on Mickey's arm, she ran.

--

The Doctor let out a long breath as he stepped out of the Tardis, the door shut firmly behind him, he stood in the rain for a moment, drops of water falling coldly on his already sodden face. The bomb shelter was massed in front of him, looking misshapen and sinister in the darkness. He took a few attentive steps forward and opened the iron door.

"Rose?" he called softly. "Mickey? I'm back, I told you –"

He cut himself off as soon as he realised the room was empty. He stood there for a moment, trying hard not to panic. Could he have gotten the time wrong? He rushed back outside, barely noticing the rain and rumble of thunder above.

At the console he gazed at the time and date with teeth gritted. Apparently he had landed forty-five minutes after he had left, instead of just the few minutes he had promised. But that meant they had wandered off…

The Doctor's stomach churned, as he ran back outside into the rain. It thrashed down on him harder than he remembered; apparently the storm was becoming more brutal.

He swallowed hard and called out into the darkness, "Rose!" His eyes were wide, wild and a deep, dark brown as he screamed into the night. He stared toward the dark forest, watching the wind rock the branches so they moved eerily against the night sky. "Mickey!" he screamed. "Rose! … _Rose!!_ "

The only response he received was the thundering crack of lightning above, followed by the lament, raging roar of a howling animal – an angry beast – coming from deep in the depths of the forest.

--Preview--

**Chapter VII **

_"...What if it got her Doctor?!"_

_"We'll find her," the Doctor said quickly, noting the boy's panic, though he had to try hard to stop his own terror giving him away. Turning to stride quickly onwards, he screamed out into the forest, "Rose!! "_

_A deafening, inhuman roar blew out from deep in the trees._


	7. Running in the Dark

**When There's No Trust **

**_Chapter Rating: _ ** K+

**_A.N:_ ** Thanks again for the reviews. They mean ever so much. Hope you like chapter seven.

* * *

**Chapter VII - Running in the Dark **

The trees set either side of the small trail of grassy dirt became nothing more than stark blurred ghosts of greys and black as Mickey and Rose ran through the depths of the forest. Their pounding hearts beat in rhythm with their slamming feet hitting against the ground. The growl behind them seemed to be growing louder, its shrill howling sending shivers down Rose's neck.

They raced through the trees, barely aware of where they were heading. Rose's hand was linked with Mickey's, and as she turned, his outline looked nothing more than that of the trees around her, a black shadow cascading against the dark night around them.

Their heartbeats quickening and breaths leaving harshly as they ran; no idea where they were heading, but vaguely aware they were delving deeper and deeper into the forest with each step, the beast becoming closer and closer with them.

It was very suddenly that Rose felt a jolt of sharp pain in the hand grasping Mickey's, and immediately after all contact was gone, his hand vanished from hers. A thin tree truck, whipping their hands apart as they ran either side of it, had separated them. Looking by her, she could see no evidence of her friend, and just hoped with all her might he was still following. The beast was still raging behind her, no evidence of it stopping. Rose cradled her hurt hand to her chest. It was throbbing painfully.

She could feel the sweat sticking her hair to her forehead, her eyes stung as the cold rain swept air gushed at her face. A flash of lightening briefly illuminated her pale face from above, followed quickly by a crack of thunder that shattered her eardrums loudly. A warning of how very close above them the storm was.

The loud growls behind her merged with the thunder above until it all raged in her ears, making her want to close her eyes tight. But she didn't, she moved on, looking from either side and hoping one of the blurred outlines of blacks and greys was Mickey.

--

"Rose!"

The Doctor was trying impossibly hard to keep the panic out of his voice as he screamed into the forest.

"Mickey!"

His footsteps were quick on the ground. His heightened vision allowed him to see where he was going, but it was still difficult to decipher what some of the shadows of the forest were.

"_Rose!!_ "

His hearts were drumming so hard against his rib cage he thought they might be in danger of jumping out of his chest. His ears were pricked up, listening for anything… anything to interpret where they were.

A forked flash from above lit the path ahead for a brief second.

"_Mickey! …Rose!!_ "

The last word of his scream amalgamated with a sudden loud and jolting crack of thunder from above. His breathing was quick and haggard; the longer he was alone, the more he was having trouble controlling it.

"_Rose!!_ "

The rain was a constant sound; he was by now so used to the gentle drumming against the canopies of the trees that it only merged into the silence. His feet continued to patter against the ground fast, until he suddenly heard a shout from the distance. An echo of the name he had just screamed out himself, but with a different voice.

A voice he recognised.

"_Mickey?!_ "

Wasting no time, he ran toward the source of the voice. The wind and rain seeping through the tree canopies above was washing his face, sending spots of water in his eyes, blurring his vision.

As he blinked the water from his eyes, he tried hard not to think about the fact that Mickey had been calling Rose's name… like himself, could that mean he didn't know where she was…?

His speed increased, and much sooner than he anticipated he collided with a thump into the London boy. The Doctor fell back, rubbing his head, where of which some part of Mickey had hit head on.

"Doctor," Mickey cried, seeming a little panicked, but mostly relieved as he blinked disbelieved at the Timelord in front of him.

"Mickey." The Doctor's eyes were wide; Mickey's features were dim in such small light, but he looked worn. "Where's Rose?" the Doctor asked, already dreading the answer.

"I dunno. We got separated," Mickey informed him. "There was… there was the beast… the _thing _ chasing us, we were holdin' hands, but we had to let go and…" he stared, wide-eyed at the Doctor, "…and I dunno, I was running but suddenly she wasn't there, and neither was the… the _beast thing_ !" He shivered in the rain, his pale, afraid face briefly illuminated by a flash above. He waited for the rumble of thunder to pass before continuing a little hysterically, "I didn't know where she was! And the beast's gone. She won't answer when I call her! What if it got her Doctor?!"

"We'll find her," the Doctor said quickly, noting the boy's panic, though he had to try hard to stop his own terror giving him away. Turning to stride quickly onwards, he screamed out into the forest, "_Rose!!_ "

A deafening, inhuman roar blew out from deep in the trees.

--

Her speed was increasing. She was sprinting through the brambles and dirt, jumping over roots, and keeping her eyes wide, trying to see past a grey-black mass of darkness. She couldn't hear the growls of the beast anymore over the thunder and thrashing rain and had no way of knowing if it was still pursuing her.

She was still cradling her wrist to her chest as it continued to ache agonizingly. She changed course; turning a sharp right, she ran into the denser reaches of trees, away from the trail. There was barely any room to move, the trees, brambles, roots, and bushes were everywhere. It wasn't long before she tripped.

Her eyes were on the ground. Her arms had come down to break her fall, causing her wrist to sting even more. She was poised on her forearms, and knees, seeing a dark muddy ground. Her eyes closed tight shut.

Nothing happened.

Opening her eyes and blinking through the darkness, her breaths were shallow and drained, her pulse banged painfully in her head. Her matted hair hung about her face. Very slowly, and trying not to wince, she rolled over to a sitting position, looking up into the trees. Nothing was there.

Through croaky breaths Rose managed to pull herself back to her feet. Cradling her hand to her chest, she took a tentative step forward. The moment her foot broke a twig with soft crack, was the moment a deafening roar drilled her eardrums from somewhere close by. It echoed around her. Someone gave a gasp, and it was a moment before Rose realised it had been herself.

"God," she whispered, voice cracked.

Another roar. Much closer this time. Rose resisted the urge to cover her ears, and gave into the more urgent need; to run.

She didn't get far before gravity and the trees roots pulled her down again. She was beginning to think that coming into the denser part of the trees had been a mistake. A low growl from behind induced a sharp gasp from her throat and she crawled behind a tall truck, sitting below it, pulling her knees to her chest, and closing her eyes.

There was nowhere to run. All she could do was prey it hadn't seen her before, and stay hidden. The growl was almost like a prolonged, angry purr coming from in front of the tree she was hidden behind.

There was a deep regret gnawing at her, as death came so close. How she had left things with the Doctor… it made her want to cry.

The rain that continued to smear down her face, merging with tears, and the constant bangs of thunder from above were now nothing more than part of the background canopy. All she could feel was the beast's presence; scuffling movements, low growls, the smell of decay. Ever more closer.

It was only a matter of time.

--Preview--

_**Chapter VIII - Blotched Black** _

_Her eyes were moist, and she was leaning heavily against the tree, holding her injured hand close, her other hand placed across her mouth in horror, her faced poked by the wood she was holding. Her breathing was erratic._

_She was going to die._


	8. Blotched Black

**When There's No Trust **

**_Chapter Rating: _ ** K+

_**A.N: ** _ Thanks again for the reviews. They mean ever so much. Hope you like chapter eight.

* * *

**Chapter VIII - Blotched Black **

His jaw was set, feet thudding against the ground in large quick strides. His eyes were black, but wide. His hands were clenched into tight fists, but still shaking. The Doctor was angry, but beyond terrified.

Nothing had been heard from the beast since that enraged howl that had shook the forest. It was deeply unsettling.

The droplets of water that caught his face as the rain fell harder were barely registered to him. Every half a minute his throat would swallow a lump, his jaw would unclench itself and he would scream her name out into the night; in desperation, in determination, in anger, terror, helplessness and desolation.

The wooded forest was big. Very big. It went on for miles the way they were headed – North East – and finding one girl in the sea of trees was like finding a butterfly in a hurricane.

Again, he screamed her name. And again, he received no answer.

Mickey felt his growing frustration. Each bolt of forked lightning above them was like another unit of time lost. And the ear-splitting cracks from above were beginning to resemble falling boulders, or a crashing train wreck. The rain was hitting harder; with larger drops, falling faster.

The storm was becoming more and more raged.

"_Rose!!_ "

Mickey swallowed hard; as, yet again, there was no reply to the Doctor's call. They strode quickly on. The Doctor's pace was quick, and Mickey had to jog to keep up with him.

The Doctor turned to him; eyes still dark, face still pained. "Can you think of where you were, Mickey? Where you two got separated? Which direction?"

Mickey looked despondently at the Timelord. His memories were blurred into the hazy blacks and greys of the forest, he couldn't even recall direction he'd come from. His head shook in hopelessness.

The Doctor groaned, frustration evident. "Where _is_ she?"

A flash from above set his aggrieved, contorted features into light for a split second, before leaving him in shadow again. Rain seeped through his hair, crawling down his face, like an illusion of creeping tears. His eyes were hard though, black. He jogged faster.

"_Rose!!_ "

The lack of any growl, any howl, or enraged wail, was beginning to unnerve him more and more. So much so, that when a throaty, growling purr rang out from not far from where they were, he, at first, thought it was a figment of his own hysterical imagination.

But Mickey stiffened, his head shooting to face the direction it had come. "Hear that?" he whispered.

The Doctor's head flickered to the same direction. He swallowed, and his jog became a fast run as he sprinted the way it had come from.

Mickey was behind him. "Doctor, wait!" He followed, their feet pounding the dark ground, the blurred shapes of the trees hurtling by giving him a large sense of déjà vu. "You're just gonna run right at that thing?!" he yelled after him.

The Doctor didn't reply. His focus was set. That thing must have Rose, and he was intent on getting her back.

--

Rose was trying very hard not to breathe, not to move, and not to let her clambering heartbeat get any faster. Her muscles and organs refused to obey though; her breaths were few and far between, but hard; her body was shaking, though whether from how cold it had suddenly got or through fear, she wasn't sure; and her heart was drumming so loud in her head, her brain was having trouble functioning appropriate thoughts properly.

Her hands, clamped around her knees, were numb with the sudden cold that seemed to have appeared from nowhere. Her back against the wide tree truck, she stared ahead, trying to listen, over the drumming of her heart, to the shuffling and growling coming from behind her and the tree.

Eyes wide and terrified, she swallowed hard.

When another growl came from behind her though, she felt the most overwhelming annoyance at herself. For sitting in fear was getting her nowhere. The shadows danced on her face, as she very slowly took her shaking hands from around her knees and gently heaved herself up to a standing position. She flexed her hand, and almost let out a pained gasp, stopping herself in the nick of time with one hand to her mouth. The other hand was letting out a stab of pain; clamped around her knees it had been still and the cold and numbed it, but now ache hit in full force.

Trying to ignore this, Rose looked to the ground and spied a long, snapped branch from the tree above her. She picked it up and forced herself to shift her position, so she was facing the tree trunk. With a pale left hand – the one that wasn't cradled painfully to her chest, but held the stick in a tight clench – she touched the trunk lightly with her fist, and moved her head slowly sideways, peeping around to look at, what would surely be, death in the face.

It was there. It was difficult to miss, but also difficult to see with clarity. It was blacker than anything around her, anything she'd ever seen before, full of the most threatening, foreboding darkness. It was the shape and colour of a large, black, dark blot on clean, white paper.

The features of the beast were impossible to fathom; she could see no eyes or lips, nose or brow. It was just a very black, dark blotch in the sinister woods. Almost like the painted picture of a murky, threatening setting had been suddenly ruined, or perhaps enhanced, by a stain of spilt, black paint.

It moved in a way she didn't recognise, gliding and stumbling at the same time. It hadn't appeared to see her. She turned back quickly, knowing it was wrong, knowing she never wanted to look at that thing ever again.

Her eyes were moist, and she was leaning heavily against the tree, holding her injured hand close, her other hand placed across her mouth in horror, her faced poked by the wood she was holding. Her breathing was erratic.

She was going to die.

That thought was held however, when she heard something other than the scuffling, growling, and searching behind her. It was a shuffling of leaves from the low bushes to her right. She could see them through the dim night. Oddly, everything seemed much lighter now; looking at that beast had made her come to the resolution that nothing was really that dark. Nothing was as dark as that _thing_ .

Brown hair and pale features suddenly appeared through the leaves. His face mixed with amazement, relief and fear as he stared her, and she mirrored it. The Doctor was alive. Rose felt her chest leap at the sight of him. An unfamiliar feeling as her lips twitched upwards in relief. For now everything else was forgotten, she just stared at his wide eyes; he was about five meters away.

"Rose," his mouth formed without sound.

Rose resisted the urge to run over… for some reason it felt like such a long time since she had seen him. The gap between her and the bushes was empty, and there was a chance the _creature_ would see her, even if she ran. Behind the Doctor, Rose noticed Mickey, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her. He tried a gentle smile.

Before Rose could try to smile back at him a louder, furious growl let out from behind her. She felt her body slam against the truck as she hid her body back in shock, turning from the two men. The beast behind her was scuffling again, but its wails were becoming quieter, its searching was edging away. She heard the blast of a breaking tree branch, the ripping of flesh against ground, and then it was silent.

Rose looked back toward the Doctor, and to her horror, found nothing but an empty bush. Nervously, she edged along the truck and peeped to the other side, but the beast had definitely disappeared. She walked slowly toward the place she'd seen the Doctor, her eyes fixed on the spot his face had been. She was only vaguely aware of the light patter of rain on the canopies above her, the lack of stars, and the lighter black stretch of sky above that was turning steadily grey.

Her hair limp and wet, her make-up smudged, and face pale, she dropped the branch she was still carrying and took her white, unhurt hand to the leaves on the bushes, and whispered at the empty space he had been; "Doctor?"

--preview--

**Chapter IX - Cold Relief **

_Rose closed her eyes and buried her face in his shoulder, taking a steady breath. She was pretending it was just like any other relieved hug they had shared after a near death experience. But she knew it wasn't the same._


	9. Cold Relief

**When There's No Trust **

**_Chapter Rating: _ ** K

_**A.N: ** _ Thanks again for the reviews. They mean ever so much. Sorry about the delay, I'm not sure about this chapter... I don't know, but I'll let you be the judges. Read on.

* * *

**Chapter IX - Cold Relief **

"Doctor?"

Her hand was quivering slightly as she reached out to the leaves in front of her, ignoring the rain clinging to her face. He had been there; she had seen him. It couldn't have been some cruel fragment of her longing imagination, could it?

She took a tentative step forward, hand lowering to her side, swallowing hard. The crack of a twig breaking sounded behind her. She stiffened, ears pricking up and eyes wide ahead. She was too afraid to turn. The creature… had it returned -?

The push on her shoulder was so sudden and unexpected – cutting off her train of thought – she screamed slightly, whipping round.

Mickey. Standing and smiling at her, he jumped slightly at her squeal.

"Mickey. Oh, God. Don't do that!" she breathed. Before he could reply, sighing greatly in relief Rose flung her arms around his neck, ignoring the pain greatly ignited in her hand and holding him tightly.

He hugged her back, and when they pulled her apart he smiled, "Are you alright?"

She managed a nod, but she was distracted as her eyes searched over his shoulder. The Doctor was standing a few meters behind Mickey; his hands slouched into his pockets. His face appeared unreadable. But his eyes painted a different picture, full of relief, anger, weariness, and a thousand other emotions.

Rose swept around Mickey, walking carefully forward, crunching the fallen leaves on her way, until she was standing in front of the Timelord. For a moment, she wasn't sure what to do – hug him or scream at him, kiss him or hit him?

She swallowed, "Are you okay?" Her voice felt broken.

He didn't answer. Instead, he very gently put his hand on the small of her back and pushed her towards him, bring her to his chest. Face still a hidden mask of impassiveness, he held her to him tightly for a good few minutes.

Mickey stood a little awkwardly by them, scuffling his feet against the leaves littering the ground.

Rose closed her eyes and buried her face in his shoulder, taking a steady breath. She was pretending it was just like any other relieved hug they had shared after a near death experience. But she knew it wasn't the same.

He pulled back too soon for them both. "We need to get back to the Tardis," he said quietly. His voice gave away no emotion. "It's this way," he pointed towards the trees and started walking slowly. Rose and Mickey followed, slightly behind, in total silence.

The rain had since slowed to a slow drizzle, only enough to catch their faces lightly through the trees. The sky was a dull grey, with traces of orange and yellow to the west, the deep darkness was gone and no forked light lit the sky. The silence following the storm was deafening.

The air had turned deadly cold, and Rose found herself putting her injured hand further against her chest, whilst keeping her other hand under her armpit for warmth. The Doctor was striding ahead purposely, seeming to know exactly where he was going, and soon the closely knitted trees appeared to separate slightly, becoming less dense, less threatening, as the sun came further into the sky.

Rose eyed the Doctor wearily; he was ahead of her and Mickey, walking quickly, face still unreadable. She swallowed hard, holding back the nerves eating her stomach, "Doctor?"

He didn't answer. He didn't even look at her.

She bit back her frustration, and squeezed her hand into a tight ball, her knuckle white.

"You sure you're alright?" Mickey asked beside her.

If she was honest she wasn't really sure if she was alright. She wasn't sure about anything anymore. All her thoughts and feelings towards everything – herself, Mickey… the Doctor – were scrambled, totally incoherent, in her head. She wasn't sure what she wanted anymore. She wasn't sure what the Doctor wanted. The only thing she _was_ sure of was the sad fact remaining that she still did not really know the man striding deliberately in front of her.

She sighed, shaking her head inwardly. "I don't know," she whispered, in answer to Mickey's question.

As they reached the edge of the trees, the small clearing came into view. The blue Police box stood out opposite the small bomb shelter. The Doctor was quick to fit in the key and usher them both in, his face resigned and waiting until they were both inside before following.

The Doctor walked over to the console, his hands moving across various switches, his face remaining masked, only showing concentration on the Tardis. Mickey leaned against the grating, shuffling from one foot to the other uncomfortably. Rose's good hand was perched on the console, her sparkling eyes watching the Timelord. The atmosphere in the ship was incredibly thick. Even with her gentle humming, the Tardis' silence hung, clinging, in the air.

Mickey coughed once. Neither other one noticed. His feet shuffled again, and he swallowed. "So Doctor," he began, not being able to stand the terrible silence. "What was it… that thing? What was it?"

There was another moment of silence, as the Doctor continued to gaze down at the controls. Finally he looked up. "They just call it the beast. Just an animal really, from long ago, that preys on human flesh." His gaze touched Rose's and he flinched slightly. "The people here, fighting in the war… they catch it not far in the future." His voice was detached, and his eyes didn't linger on any given place.

Rose found herself leaning back against the console, sighing gently, and looking around the large Tardis interior. If she focussed hard, it was all just normal enough, back where they started, to believe that the past few hours had been nothing but one long and terrible nightmare. Of course, when her gaze fell upon the Doctor's resigned face, she realised things weren't really the same.

She was alive, and he was alive, but did it change anything? She wasn't sure.

"Um," Mickey mumbled edgily. "I think I'm gonna… get a shower." He pointed in the vague direction of the corridors, backing slowly towards them, clearly uncomfortable.

Rose offered him a small smile. "See ya later," she said softly.

He gave her a long meaningful look, and nodded. His footfalls echoed through the silence that followed, his head bent, as he disappeared into the Tardis interior.

She was watching Mickey's retreating back, thoughtfully biting her lip and staring past the Tardis walls. She wondered if this would be one of the last times she would be in the Tardis. Would she be leaving… today… tomorrow… at all? Did she want to leave? She frowned, her hair skimming her cheek, bringing her aching hand subconsciously into her other hand. She didn't notice the Doctor watching her.

"Are you hurt?" His voice cut her reverie.

She looked up at him, startled. His face was the same mask of blankness, but she saw a great flicker of guilt and concern in his eyes. "It's 'kay," she muttered quietly.

He was next to her in three long strides, his brow furring as he took her hand in his. His fingers were cold, but soft, as they felt her hand. She watched his face, as the crease between his eyebrows creased a little more. Almost as if he cared, she mused.

"It might be fractured," he muttered. His gaze finally lifted from her hand, meeting her eyes where they stayed for a moment. And, for a short second, Rose saw the anguish, the fear, the anger, and the relief clearly in the brown orbs. He blinked, and the cold impassiveness returned. "We better go to the infirmary. Come on," he said quietly.

He led the way into the brightly lit, white room, motioning her to sit on the hard mattress of the medic cot. She did so, her eyes reverting to her limp hand rather than the Doctor.

He reached for a piece of equipment from one of the near by tables and held her hand in his. Gently, he scanned the device over her hand. She recognised it as something he'd once told her he had gotten from the sixtieth century that heals all bones.

Once he had done he let go, and she felt an odd loss as the contact disappeared. Rose flexed her wrist and fingers gratefully. "Thanks," she murmured.

She looked back up at him. He was standing apart from her, his arms folded, eyes slightly pained. She noticed his hair was still wet, and hers too now she thought about it. "What now?" he asked quietly. There was a sense of hurt in his voice, as well as… anger?

She knew he wasn't talking about passing the time. He wanted to know if she wanted to leave. And he wanted to know why she had followed him into the forest. She wasn't sure she had either answer.

--Preview--

**Chapter X  **

_He blinked at her. His mouth opened, but then closed again, anger evaporated for the moment. "I told you I would…" His eyes were almost pleading as he stared at her. "You said… I thought you trusted me."_

_Rose looked back down at the floor, her teeth chewing on her bottom lip. "We all say things we don't mean Doctor," she said quietly. "You should know that."_


	10. Moving Further Apart

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating: ** K

**A.N: ** Here's chapter ten. Oh, and by the way, you guys are going to hate me for this chapter…Sorry in advance. This is an angsty chapter… sorry about that too.

* * *

**Chapter X – Moving Further Apart **

_What now?_ The question bounded around her mind, begging her to agree upon a legitimate plan of action. Something right. But was the right thing to do, the thing she wanted?

"I don't know," she whispered her answer to his question, looking down at the floor, her eyes focused on the Doctor's shoes. She found her feet moving towards the door, desperate to get out of the infirmary.

He caught her arm. "Rose." His tone was demanding but gentle. She could feel his eyes boring into her, though hers were still focussed on the floor, tracing the tiny black dots in the tiles. He sighed heavily. "We need to talk."

She nodded, "I thought as much." She swallowed hard and pulled her arm from his grasp. She stood with her body facing him, but still staring down at the floor, avoiding the look that would surely show in his eyes.

He watched her. His eyes clouded and pained, whist his mouth was a grim line of determination. His hands dug into his pockets. From what he could see of Rose's eyes, they were misty and red. Her hands were wrapped round her chest.

Her eyelashes were wet, though she couldn't remember whether she had been crying or they were simply clinging, fallen raindrops from the storm.

"Rose," the Doctor said softly.

Rose raised her head to look at him. She closed her eyes for two seconds, trying to harden her eyes, before opening them again and staring up at him. "What do you want from me, Doctor?" She tried to keep her tone even and firm. But it just sounded broken.

He sighed, and shook his head. "Why did you follow me, Rose?"

"Because…" She gave a gentle sigh, watching his face. "I don't know…" she murmured honestly. Her fists clenched together tightly, before opening slowly up again, as she tried to stop them sweating.

The Doctor turned away from her, a low breath escaping hard from his nose. He walked over to the cabinet containing various medical supplies, his hands held stiffly on the tabletop. He stayed frozen for a moment, his back to her. "You could have been killed," she heard him say clearly and darkly.

"So could you," Rose retorted, voice still a little broken. But something inside her was waking. She could feel the boiling in her throat, the shout she wanted to let out.

He span round to face her so fast, it didn't look like he'd moved at all. "No," he disagreed with teeth slightly gritted, "I was fine. I _told_ you I would be fine."

Rose inhaled a heavy breath. The anger was coming from him now. That was good; she could feel her own anger threatening to spill over, mere seconds away.

"You also said you'd only be a few minutes," she said loudly, feeling her breath heat in her throat a little as the anger built up.

"That wasn't my fault. I got the timing a little off. It gives you no reason to go swaning off into a beast infested forest and nearly getting yourself and Mickey killed!" the Doctor snapped.

"I was tryin' to find you in case you were hurt!" Rose said angrily, her fists clenched. Her face was hard and determined, but her eyes softened and she shook her head gently as she murmured, "I didn't know if you would come back."

He blinked at her. His mouth opened, but then closed again, anger evaporated for the moment. "I told you I would…" His eyes were almost pleading as he stared at her. "You said… I thought you trusted me."

Rose looked back down at the floor, her teeth chewing on her bottom lip. "We all say things we don't mean Doctor," she said quietly. "You should know that."

He looked away, stung. When he looked back Rose's eyes were on the door, but she turned back to the Doctor, somehow managing to meet his eyes. He swallowed hard as he plucked up the courage for the next sentence, "Do you want to go home?"

Rose thought about that. If he had asked her that a few weeks ago she would have scoffed and told him she was already home. As it was, she wasn't at all sure. Things had changed, but had they changed that much? She stared at the alien in front of her in contemplation, her eyes searching his face. Did it really matter what she wanted, if he was ready to say goodbye so easily, anyway?

Rose shrugged, her teeth covering her bottom lip as she bit down subconsciously. "I don't know," she murmured in a hoarse whisper.

The Doctor stared at her, pained. His mouth opened to speak –

"Oh." A voice from the door made them both whip around. Mickey was standing there, looking a little awkward. His hand on the doorframe, he looked from Rose to the Doctor, clearing his throat. "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I was just, um, seeing if you were…" he trailed off, watching them both nervously.

"That's okay," said Rose softly, looking at him. "We're done." She took a step towards the door.

"Rose," the Doctor uttered. She thought it amazing how much sentiment he could put into a single name. When spoken in that way her name became a demand, a statement, a question, an answer, and a plea all at once.

She looked back at him. They had gotten nowhere; that much was clear. She stared at him for a long moment, still hovering by the door. Mickey leaned back, looking uncomfortable. Rose tilted her head gently to her shoulder, frowning, "Why did you leave me in that bomb shelter? Why couldn't I come?"

His facial expression didn't change. He looked on at her, slightly pleading, with soft eyes. "Why do think?" he asked quietly.

She shook her head in confusion.

"To keep you safe," he said fiercely, determined. "Why else?"

She thought about that for a moment, not noticing Mickey backing away until he spoke from outside the room, "I'll… be in the kitchen."

Rose turned to him. "I'll see you in a minute," she nodded solemnly. Mickey nodded in reply, before disappearing into the corridor.

When Rose turned back to the Doctor, she was slightly shocked to find him in much closer proximity, standing right in front of her. He stared at her. His hand went forward and touched her shoulder. She didn't shake it off like she thought she would. He spoke more serious than she had heard from him in a long time, "Rose, do you want to leave?"

She caught momentarily off guard, but shook her head slowly, "I don't _want_ to leave… but that doesn't mean I shouldn't."

His mouth opened and closed a few times before he finally replied. "I don't want you to go." Rose made to look down at the floor, but before she could the Doctor brought her chin back up with his finger. "Rose, listen to me," he said softly. She looked him in the eye. "You… you know me. I am the same man as I always was. I always will be. I'll never leave you."

"You can't know that," she replied softly. "How do I know it's the truth…?" She shook her head.

"You have my word. Isn't that enough?" he asked desperately. "Please… trust me Rose."

"I had your word before," she said, an edge to her tone. "It didn't seem to be enough then."

The Doctor visibly flinched.

Rose backed up, the Doctor's hand touching thin air as her chin pulled away gently. She cleared her throat and turned towards the door. "I'm sorry," he heard her murmur as she left. "I can't."

--

Mickey had his head slumped down onto his folded arms on the kitchen table as Rose joined him. His eyes flickered to her as she walked in. His face brightened, but his eyes dimmed when he saw Rose looked visibly worn. "You all right?" he asked, sitting up.

Rose shrugged, slumping down in a chair next to him and dropping her head onto his shoulder. "I don't know what to do anymore Mickey."

"Didn't you talk?" he asked.

"Yeah…"

"Is he still being a prat?" Mickey asked, an edge of dark humour to his tone.

Rose didn't speak for a moment. "No," she whispered finally. "He's not. But it doesn't matter, I still can't… trust him."

Mickey looked at her, her hair tickling his chin and face so sad, in thought. Closing his eyes and smelling her honey shampoo, he leaned his head on hers, muttering quietly in her ear, "Do you wanna go? Go back home?"

Rose sighed, her shoulder lifting against him. "Not really. I love this place."

"Just not his company, yeah?" Mickey chucked.

Rose looked up at him, "Do you want to go?"

"Not if you don't want me to. I'll always be here for ya, you know. As long as you want me."

She smiled at him. It was a forced effort, but it was still a smile. "I think I need you here right now." She raised her eyebrows at him, "You know how much you mean you me don't you, you idiot?" She forced her smile wider, playfully tapping him on the arm.

He grinned back, as she settled on to his shoulder again. "I know," he said, smiling. Then his face fell into thoughtfulness, and he was frowning slightly when he next spoke. "Rose?" he questioned.

"Yeah?"

"You don't have to stay here," he said quietly. "You don't feel you do coz of the Doctor, do you? Coz you're scared he'll be alone or something. If you don't feel safe here –"

"I never said I didn't feel safe," Rose cut him off.

"But you don't trust him."

Rose laughed. "Yeah, but that doesn't mean he's dangerous," she said thinking of the absurdity of that.

"Then why don't you trust him?"

She gawped for a moment, struggling to find the right words. "Because –"

"He can hurt you," Mickey interrupted with a scowl. "He _has_ hurt you. He'll keep hurting you."

Rose didn't reply for a moment. Her eyes were locked upon the table, glazed over and not seeing. Her hair locked over her face in strands, the light above sending dark shadows over her face. "And what am I supposed to do if I go back to the Powel Estate?" she asked sceptically.

Mickey's eyes watched her closely, his mouth parted as he considered his next sentence. "Move on," he finally said gently.

Rose looked up at him, her face lifting to meet his gaze and look on level with his. Her eyes were wide and clearly quite terrified by the prospect of leaving this life behind. She swallowed the visible lump in her throat. "I can't," she almost choked.

"Rose," he whispered gently. He put his warm, dark fingers to her chin. She was reminded with a shiver the déjà vu of that sentiment.

Mickey watched her brown eyes, slightly wet, and put his thumb on her lips. She looked so disheartened, so brave, and so beautiful. Without thinking, wihout knowing what he was doing he selfishly, stupidly, but very willingly, leant down and pressed his lips against hers.

The Timelord watched from the doorway, his pained face an illusion when covered as it was in shadow.

* * *

--Preview--

**Chapter XI - A Promise Broke**

_The Doctor's gaze was slightly startling; full of such a fire of passion and devotion it left her slightly breathless just by looking into those deep chestnut irises._

_"What?" she somehow managed to say in half a whisper._

_He shook his head, still gazing at her intently, affectionately, "Just you."_


	11. A Promise Broke

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** T

**A.N: ** Chapter 11 here… Thank you for all the reviews everyone. Oh, and the ratings been changed to a 'T'. Nothing bad, and no swearing, but... well, it's a bit more intimate...

* * *

**Chapter XI - A Promise Broke **

Mickey's lips felt cold, wet and yet fierce against hers, his fingers touching her chin softly. Rose flinched back. "Mickey," she muttered, looking away, a warning in her tone. "Don't."

Mickey took his head back, but he was still staring hard at her. "Rose, c'mon. You don't have to –"

"Mickey," she repeated warningly. "Don't. Don't ruin it." She stood up. "I need a shower."

"Wait, Rose. I'm sorry," Mickey uttered, grabbing her hand. She flinched it away from him. "I'm sorry," he repeated. "It was stupid. I didn't mean to –"

"Yeah," Rose murmured, her eyes already on the doorway, as she sidestepped around the table. "I know." She walked quickly through the doorway and nearly ran headlong into the Doctor. "Oh, sorry." Her voice sounded oddly croaky as she stared at his pained face.

He didn't say anything, and she took it as an excuse to escape down the corridor before she did something she would regret. Though whether that was hitting him or hugging him, she wasn't entirely sure.

The Doctor watched her go, before entering the kitchen. Mickey was sitting at the table, his head in his hands, staring down hard at a cup of tea like he was hoping to drown inside it. The Doctor walked over and leant against the kitchen cabinets. Silence issued; the only sound was the men's harsh breathing.

At the point that it became unbearably uncomfortable Mickey lifted his head and stared ahead at the wall for a few moments. "She doesn't want to leave," he stated into the room.

The Doctor's eyes moved over to the young man, though his position against the cabinets didn't relax. "Doesn't she?"

"She likes it here," Mickey said quietly.

"Just not the company?"

Mickey stiffened, suddenly feeling like he's been hit over the face with a wet fish. Those were the exact same words he had said to Rose mere moments ago. The Doctor's tone suggested something else… he had been listening, possibly seen everything. He knew Mickey had kissed her…

Risking a look at the Doctor, Mickey turned his head. His face was unreadable, but his eyes were dark, and as he stared at Mickey something close to abhorrence showed in them. Mickey flinched away from the glare.

"Not my company, anyway," the Doctor muttered bitterly.

Mickey looked back down at the table as another wave of silence took over. "I get the feeling she's hiding somethin' from me," he said after a while. He was desperate to bring the subject away from what had gone in this room a few minutes ago.

His statement only received more silence.

"I dunno what it could be, but I thought you…" Mickey trailed off, beginning to think maybe, even if the Doctor did have some clue, he was beginning to push his luck. "I mean, I think we both want the same thing, don't we? For her to… be okay, be happy. It's not gonna all sort itself out."

"I think maybe you have a better idea of what goes on inside her head than I do," the reply finally came.

Mickey looked back up at the Doctor. What he said next was laced in deep regret but total honesty. "I think, Doctor, that you know Rose a lot better than I do. Even if it doesn't feel like it very much at the moment."

The Doctor didn't reply for a moment, he was staring off into the distance. "Do you want to go back home Mickey?" he asked eventually, quietly.

Mickey swallowed, unsure of where this was going. "Uh, I dunno."

The Doctor gave a bitter chuckle, "You both seem awfully unsure of yourselves when it comes to leaving."

"No," Mickey said, frown lining his brow. "I just… wanna wait and see what Rose wants to do."

The Doctor raised his eyebrows at the boy, "Why Mickey? Do you think I'm _dangerous?"_ He laughed at the ridiculousness of that, remembering Mickey's words from earlier.

"No," he replied, with a scowl. "Maybe not in the way you're thinkin'. But you can still hurt her, and make her hate you."

"She already hates me Mickey."

"She doesn't," Mickey disagreed. "She just doesn't trust you."

The Doctor shook his head; saying quietly, "She should hate me." He hesitated, before adding, "She has good reason to."

Mickey was frowning at him, "You agree you shouldn't have left us on that spaceship? All right, yeah, that's true. But I didn't think you'd see it as good enough reason for her to hate you. Is there somethin' I'm missing?" The Doctor didn't say anything and Mickey span around in his chair, facing the Doctor with a look of great bitterness. "That's it, isn't it? Did you do something else before I got here? Did you hurt her before the space station? What the hell did you do?!"

Mickey wasn't sure the Doctor was listening to his questions though. His expression was far away; his eyes were staring through the kitchen, at nothing. His hands gripped the cabinet behind him in a clenching force; the knuckles white and muscles clamped together. His mouth was brought together in a tight line.

He turned away from Mickey, but as hard as he tried to block the questions, and the recollections they brought, he couldn't help but remember…

_Two Weeks Previously  _

The Doctor's hands brushed over the console, his eyes gliding swiftly over the screen for a moment before nodding satisfactorily. His hand was just hovering over one of the levers when he suddenly felt something soft and warm run over his eyes and his vision disappeared. A soft voice rang out in his ear, "Guess who?"

He felt the sides of his face pull up, as he gave a musical, "hmm," swiftly in mock thought. "Well, that's a tough one. You sound a bit like a girly kind of Mickey I suppose. Girly; but Mickey is a bit of a girl, isn't he? Or, did I pick up Maria-Winip-Hagula from the planet of Imagance without realising? I've heard that can happen… No? Must be a Tyler then. Hopefully the right one."

"What if it was the wrong one?" said the voice in his ear.

"Oh, you don't want to know."

The warmth over his eyes disaperated and his vision reappeared. A blond, cheeky faced Rose appeared at his side. "Am I the right Tyler?"

"Oh," he grinned. "Exactly right." He turned back to face the corridor, curious, "So where've you left Mickity-Mick-Mick-Mickey? Wandering, lost, in the corridors? Bored of him already, are you?"

Rose snorted, "He's hardly lost. He's in the games room. And, if I remember rightly, he's _your_ guest."

"My guest? Hmph, he's your Mickey. And I didn't invite him, he asked." The Doctor shrugged nonchalantly, turning to face his companion, hands resting easily on the console behind him as he leaned back. Eyes fixed on Rose, as she tugged a smile back at him.

"He's not _my_ Mickey," she contradicted, though not without humour. "He doesn't belong to me."

The Doctor nodded. "And thank God for that. Imagine having to pull him around _all_ the time like a lost puppy!"

Rose laughed. "Aw, leave Mickey alone, he isn't that bad!"

"Huh, if you say so," he replied sceptically.

Rose raised an eyebrow at him, "If you don't like him, why'd you invite him, eh?" She grinned.

"I told you. He asked, I replied." The Doctor sighed, overdramatically. Then his eyes flew over Rose as she leaned back against the console, as she stared ahead into the Tardis corridors, her head falling on his shoulder. "You don't mind, do you?" he asked eventually. "If Mickey joins… it doesn't bother you, does it?"

Rose looked up at him, "Guess not, no. Not really. Just be a bit… weird, havin' him in the Tardis."

"I thought you might… want him aboard," the Doctor admitted.

Rose frowned at him, "Why?"

"_Why?"_

"Why?" she repeated with a nod.

The Doctor's mouth stayed slightly parted, his head tilted as he shrugged, "I dunno… I thought, you might… miss him or something."

Rose rolled her eyes, "You are daft, you know."

"So, you don't then?"

"Used to," she admitted. "A little." Then she gave him a cocky grin; her hand wrapped itself around his arm, and she gazed up at him, eyes bright. "But then… I've got you, don't I? So what's to miss?"

He grinned back goofily, "What indeed?" He found himself stroking back the blond strands from her cheeks as he went on, "I suppose you realised that me being so utterly brilliant and everything, and having access to the best ship in the universe, it would be quite impossible for you to miss anything you don't already have."

Rose chuckled into his hand, as he cupped her cheek. "Oh, yeah, spot on. Right up until I realised Mickey doesn't have quite a big a head as you. Might miss that a bit." She grinned, tongue peeking through her teeth, to let him know she was joking.

The Doctor threw his hand away in dismissal, "Ah please, Mickey's heads huge. He just doesn't always let up."

He went on stroking Rose's hair back without even seeming to realise, his gaze far away in thought. Rose noticed though; she closed her eyes as his hand played over her head, his hand caressing her cheek every now and then with a small, soft brush of his fingers.

Eventually, it stopped, and she felt his hand run down to her neck on the crook of her shoulder. She opened her eyes, and was slightly embarrassed to find him staring at her. The Doctor's gaze was slightly startling; full of such a fire of passion and devotion it left her slightly breathless looking into those deep chestnut irises.

"What?" she somehow managed to say, in half a whisper.

He shook his head, still gazing at her intently, affectionately, "Just you."

She looked down at the Doctor's shoes. "Right, well, I'll remember to, uh, d- do whatever it is that I was more often… then," she muttered, tripping a little over her words. He was still watching her intently and, as she felt his gaze bore into her, she couldn't help her own eyes crawl back up to meet his.

The Doctor felt his own eyes dip, just for a second, from her eyes to her lips.

It was enough.

He saw her swallow, and the atmosphere in the room built up several notches. Slowly, he lightly brought his head closer to hers, their foreheads touching.

"I'm sorry I invited Mickey," he whispered hoarsely, his voice as raw as the room now was.

"That's 'kay," Rose whispered back. "He can be a good friend."

"Nothing like us," the Doctor's quiet voice affirmed, his scratchy voice breathing sweetly against her face.

"Not a scratch on this. Nothing like this."

The Doctor leaned closer, his nose brushing against hers. He seemed to hesitate, his eyes still containing the fervour, as he they gazed at hers. Rose was finally the one to push their lips forward, pressing her mouth onto his, suddenly meeting in one swift movement. They locked, and the Doctor soon found his hands wrapped around her waist.

The kiss started soft, with parting and teasing caresses, but as it delved deeper, their tongues began to explore. The fireworks in the Doctor's eyes were firing through his lips, pressing into Rose. The zeal picked up and the Doctor's push forced Rose back against the console. Her hands ran through his hair, lacing it through her fingers, pushing her mouth teasingly around his lips.

She felt herself being led somewhere, but all she really saw was the Doctor, his lips soft and powerful against hers. Before they entered the Doctor's bedroom, the Doctor's husky voice was in her ear again, "Are you sure?"

Her answer was a swift, hard kiss against his neck, and nothing else was said.

--

Later in the large bed, as she hugged closer to him, totally relaxed now; she wondered how it had all happened so fast. To go from teasing each other, laughing with each other, to _this,_ so suddenly… She had lost herself in the moment, but feeling his skin against hers, she couldn't be happier.

He looked at her with a small smile, "Alright there?"

She grinned back. "Never better," she assured.

The Doctor kissed her forehead gently.

"Doctor?"

"Hmm?"

"This. I mean, why did…? Why?"

There was a long pause in which the Doctor said nothing, simply staring past her, and Rose wondered if he would reply at all. When his voice did finally breeze through the room it was quiet and obviously a struggle, "I… I had to, uhm… tell you… how I – well how I… I mean, how it is… without words. I mean, before, with Sarah Jane and everything, I just wanted you to know…" He stared down at her, before saying much more clearly, "This is why I can never leave you."

Rose smiled widely at him, "Is that a promise?"

"Trust me, this is the biggest promise I'll ever make anyone."

It was only a day later the promise broke.

--Preview--

**Chapter XII - When Without Words **

_"I can't do this anymore," she whispered. "It hurts too much."_

_"I know," he replied quietly. "I can't either." _

_He saw her take a large intake of breath. "I want to – need to – go home."_


	12. When Without Words

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K+

* * *

**Chapter XII – When Without Words **

Rose pulled her legs to her chest, balancing her chin on her knees. She was sat down on the floor of the console room, her back against the central column. Her hair was damp from her shower, leaving soggy strands hanging against her shoulders, cheeks and forehead. She brought her legs tighter around her, staring straight ahead. It felt peaceful sitting there, with the gentle hum of the Tardis vibrating around her.

She had a certain fondness for memories that had taken place in the control room; it was both wonderfully uplifting to think about, and a hot, raw agony to remember what a lie it had been.

"Rose?" a startled, familiar voice interrupted her memories.

Rose raised her head to find the Doctor standing and staring at her from the doorway. He was clearly weary, hovering awkwardly by the door with evident surprise written on his face. His hand gripped the doorframe, his position looking almost as if he was ready, and wanted, to bolt right back the way he had come.

He was clearly wondering what exactly she was doing sitting on the floor of his console room; her hair wet and dripping slightly onto the floor, her hands wrapped around her legs like she was trying to hold her chest together. Which, she was really. Not that she didn't know that wouldn't mend a broken heart.

"What are you… doing in here?" his small voice asked.

"Uhm." She swallowed hard and unclamped her arms from around her knees. Hesitantly, she rose to her feet, standing against the console. "Nothin'. I was just… I'm sorry…" she murmured, walking toward the door past the Doctor.

He caught her arm before she left. "Wait," he commanded softly. "Rose, we need to… to talk about this." Instinctively, and rather stupidly, for reasons even he didn't know, his hand went up to her face to brush away a strand of damp hair from her cheek. She flinched away as though he'd electrocuted her, and his hand fell back limply to his side.

"I think we've said enough," Rose muttered to him. She tugged her arm away and started toward the corridor. He stepped in front of her.

"Why won't you let me explain anything?" he shot.

"You're never trying _to_ explain anything," she sharply quipped back. "Besides, there's nothing to explain."

"Rose," he pleaded, "We need to talk about Reniette – "

"No. Please." Rose closed her eyes tightly. She didn't want to think about the beautiful, French courtesan who stole the Doctor's heart. She wanted to leave the console room, _had_ to leave; the last thing Rose wanted was for this wonderful, brilliant, selfish man in front of her to see her cry right now.

"Rose," the Doctor's velvety soft, commanding tone managed to stop her before she sidestepped around him. "So many things are unsaid, but I don't know where to begin. I –"

"No," Rose interrupted. She backed away into the console room, and turned and laughed, nervous but bitter. "You're no good with words, remember? Not ones that count, anyway." She walked over to the control panel and closed her eyes, brushing her hands over the console softly. "But maybe that doesn't matter anymore."

"What?" He took two small steps forward.

She turned to face him; he was appalled and despairing to find tears running down her cheeks. How many times had he made Rose cry…? That thought made him despise himself even more. "I can't do this anymore," she whispered. "It hurts too much."

"I know," he replied quietly. "I can't either."

He saw her take a large intake of breath. "I want to – need to – go home."

He felt something catch in his throat, from the core of his heart. It was like she had just punched him in the chest. He'd been expecting it. He'd been waiting for it. But she had hesitated for so long now; been so unsure, he had told himself that it wouldn't –won't – happen; given himself – overwhelmed himself in – false hope.

He needed to tell her, 'No!'. Needed to beg her to stay. Needed to grab her and hold her so tightly she would stay locked in his arms forever. Needed to beg forgiveness. Needed to shout at her and demand she never leave. Needed to kiss her, and hold her, and make love to her in a way she would _know_ how much he cared for her. Because he needed _her_ .

But he couldn't. He stared at her, mouth open in a perfect 'O' of astonishment and horror. A mangled, cried release of panicked breath was all he could manage.

"Please Doctor," he heard her say quietly. "Can you take me and Mickey home now?"

He didn't trust himself to speak, afraid of what would come out of his mouth. Instead he nodded slowly, still astonished, and walked over to the console. His hand was shaking slightly as he placed it on one of the levers. He scrunched it into a tight ball, his fingernails digging into his skin. Another hitch caught in his throat.

He couldn't believe he was losing her. He couldn't believe she had been the one to decide he was losing her… then again, he supposed really it had been his fault. He hand been the one to decide this fate without even realising it.

He couldn't believe he was losing – perhaps already lost – her, not to the monsters of his world, but to his own actions.

"I've been thinking about it a lot," he heard her say softly, and slightly brokenly, from her place around the console. She was facing him, he could tell, but he couldn't look at her – too afraid of the expression he would find. "The other… night," she whispered.

He stiffened still. They hadn't spoken about that since it had happened – probably, part of his mistake. His hand was still clenched onto the lever; he hadn't moved it, hadn't moved at all. His eyes remained focused on the console in front of him, not one inch of his body moving. Immobile as a statue.

"Why?" Rose's cracked voice washed over. "I need to know… before I go. Why did you… do that? Why did you promise me all I've ever wanted, and then rip it all away from me?" There was a pregnant pause. "I… understand she was this wonderful… wonderful woman. And you had to save her… and history. And you lo –" she took a deep breath, swallowing hard, "loved her… but, why Doctor? Why did you have to give me that promise just the day before?" She was still staring at him, he could tell. He didn't look at her, but he didn't have to – he could see the tears, the pained expression, in his minds eye. She spoke again, her voice oddly even, almost hard, "Were you trying to hurt me?"

He knew he had to answer that. A simple, but very firm, 'no' was easy and honest. Yet, his throat was closed off. He still couldn't move. He was no good with words, she was right. His jaw unlocked. "No." It was barely a whisper. He hoped she heard it.

"Are we going somewhere?" A voice from behind made Rose whip around. The Doctor still didn't, couldn't, move.

"Home," Rose replied quietly.

"Oh." Mickey appeared surprised but not at all displeased by this. He walked up to the console, and placed his hand on the small of Rose's back. "Are you sure?" he asked her.

The Doctor felt her gaze bore into his back. "Yes," she said quietly.

There was a long pause during which the Doctor realised they were both waiting for him to set the Tardis back to the Powel estate. He took a shuddering breath and unclasped the hand that was still gripped on one of the levers. Running his hands over buttons and switches the Tardis shuddered as it span through the vortex. They all gripped the console and waited. It shook to a stop.

For a moment they all simply stilled where they were, still holding the Tardis as if never wanting to go. Each of them. But the moment passed quickly and Mickey straightened up. "I'll get my stuff then," he muttered.

"You're okay," Rose stopped him quickly. "I'll get them all." She took a half jog, and was through the door into the corridor before the Doctor had time to register what she'd said.

The Doctor turned and pressed his weight against the console, closing his eyes and leaning heavily against it. He stared at the place she had disappeared. Mickey was watching him with heavy eyes.

"Why aren't you trying to stop her?" Mickey asked quietly.

The Doctor didn't answer at first. His drawn face and slouched body looked older than ever. His gaze tired and so pained. "I can't… do anything."

"You're not even trying," Mickey muttered, sounding disgusted. "I'll be the first to admit you're a git for what you did to us. Leaving us there like that. But… I thought you had to, to save the timeline _and_ Madame de Pompadour." He swallowed, staring at the Doctor through his hard brown eyes. "I thought it could be forgiven, I thought she would forgive you. I was afraid she would, coz I thought you might do it again, and I don't wanna lose her." _And that's why I kissed her,_ he thought, but didn't add.

The Doctor looked up at the young man. The Tardis lights were casting shadows against his face; he looked darker, wiser and older that the Doctor had ever seen him. "Do you forgive me, Mickey?" the Doctor asked.

Mickey eyed him for a moment, before giving a small nod "Yeah, I do." He frowned slightly. "But Rose doesn't… I'm not gonna pretend I know entirely why that is. 'Cept you two are hiding something…"

The Doctor didn't say anything, and within a few minutes of silence Rose had reappeared, carrying two rucksacks. The Doctor's hearts reacted painfully in his chest again at the sight of the bags. Proof it was happening. It wasn't a game. She was leaving.

"Rose," he croaked. "Won't you just… let me…"

"No," she cut into him. She walked right up and stood in front of him. He could see her mascara stained cheeks. Her large, wounded brown eyes. Her still damp blonde hair. "It's better this way, yeah? You're better like this."

He could have laughed at the ridiculousness of that sentence in any other situation. As it was, he didn't think he would ever smile again. "No, please," he stated hoarsely. But it was barely a whisper, and he wasn't sure she had heard him.

She took out her mobile phone from her pocket and handed to him. "This has got all that hokery-pokery stuff on it, hasn't it? I don't think I'll need that. You keep it."

Then she put her hand back into her pocket and, as it reappeared, he caught a flash of silver. She unclamped his right hand from its tight fist and placed the Tardis key into his palm, closing his hand up again. Her head was bent so he couldn't see her tears.

With that, she turned, took Mickey's hand, and left her life behind. Taking one of the Doctor's hearts with her.

--Preview--

**Chapter XIII - Night **

_"It's dark," Mickey echoed the same words he used before. He was stating the obvious, but it was an open invitation for Rose to give her thoughts._

_"Yes," her croaked reply came. He could tell by her voice she was still so deeply in pain from what had just occurred in the Tardis. "Too dark. Too quiet." Her speed increased; large strides ahead that reminded Mickey jarringly too much of the Timelord they had just left behind. She glanced his way; "There's somethin' not right. Not right at all."_


	13. Forever Night

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K+

* * *

**Chapter XIII – Forever Night **

It was dark when they got out onto the street. Very dark. The moon was a small, thin crescent, a curled, small mark in the black sky. The air was cold. Winter air. The large flats of the Powel Estate stood out ahead as a large blotch in the night.

Mickey couldn't help noticing, as he took a step towards the dark building, that there was no light. None at all. Not even from the windows of the run down flats they were headed towards. Or the street lamps they were passing. Everywhere was totally dark.

He took his bag from Rose, slinging neatly over his back as they walked on. They were both silent for a while. "It's so dark," Mickey broke it after a while.

Rose didn't reply, and as he glanced at her he realised she probably wasn't even listening. Her mind was entirely bound to her thoughts – thoughts on the Doctor, of course. He wondered if she regretted it; if she wanted to go back to him already.

Before he can think to ask her though, there is the sound behind them; the sound of a mechanical clanging of pitch, the sound of Time scratching, the sound of the Tardis dematerialising behind them.

He thought he heard a dry, choked sob beside him, but when he looked at what he could see of Rose through the darkness, her face was a blank mask of impassiveness.

They walked on slowly, not pausing or daring to look back at the blank place where the Tardis stood moments before. The place was eerily quiet except for their footsteps echoing on the gravel.

It was a while before Mickey realised how odd the silence really was. There was no sound of any cars. No loud music of the adolescent teenagers that usually blared through the flat windows. No drunken shouts carrying over from the nearby pub. No anything.

Mickey had to admit, it was very odd, very… scary. The dark was all consuming, a suffocating blanket around them. They could barely see the hand in front of their faces. And the quiet – a suffocating, screaming howl of absolutely no noise.

He glanced around at Rose, about to mention something, but he didn't need to. He could tell she was worried, uneasy about the street they were on just by looking at her furred brow and glances through the dark. Of course she had noticed, most likely much before he had. She may have been suffering, from what could only be described as severe heartbreak, but she could still see when something was off.

But what was it?

"It's dark," Mickey echoed the same words he used before. He was stating the obvious, but it was an open invitation for Rose to give her thoughts.

"Yes," her croaked reply came. He could tell by her voice she was still so deeply in pain from what had just occurred in the Tardis. "Too dark. Too quiet." Her speed increased; large strides ahead that reminded Mickey jarringly too much of the Timelord they had just left behind. She glanced his way; "There's somethin' not right. Not right at all."

--

It was very cold inside the flat. Cold, dark and quiet – just like outside. And no one was in either. Where was Jackie? Mickey wasn't sure what would have possessed her to leave the flat, but it could have been anything, he supposed. It wasn't like he had any idea what the time was after all. He checked the clock above the door in the kitchen with a flicker of his eyes. It read five to two.

He looked at Rose through the darkness. She looked tired. Very tired.

He sighed, resting his head in the palm of his hand. The lights were out. He'd tried switching them on – flicking the switch over and over, driving Rose mad – over a dozen times, but they were out. All the lights in the flat were out. As was every other electrical appliance he'd tried. A power cut, he supposed.

His gaze flickered to Rose again; still tired. "You look exhausted," he told her. "Go get some sleep. I'll wake ya when your mum gets back if you want."

She was gazing out of the window, her thoughts far away. Her brown eyes almost lost in their emotion. Her mouth parted but paused in thought. "Somethin's not right," he heard her murmur. "It's all wrong."

"Rose," he prodded gently. "Get some sleep, yeah?"

Her eyes flickered and lingered on him. "What 'bout you?"

"I'll sleep on the sofa, if that's alright?" he replied. He didn't like the thought of going back o his silent flat and leaving her alone. She was venerable. She was almost appearing lost to him. But above all, she was distinctly upset and heartbroken. He didn't know what she would do if he left, and while he didn't want to consider the thought of her doing something stupid… it was still a possibility.

It was difficult to admit to himself that he didn't really know Rose as well as he wished.

"What about mum…?" she muttered, her eyes back on the window.

"I bet she's just gone to Bev's or somewhere for the night... or maybe Howard's. The power's out… so maybe she just wanted to see if anyone else's is. Or doesn't want to spend the night alone… or something." It seemed possible to him. Jackie was at Howard's most nights anyway.

Yet, Rose seemed dubious. "Maybe," she muttered. She really did look exhausted.

"Rose," he said. "Go to bed. Please."

She looked up at him, her eyes full of clear pain that she didn't even seem to be bothering to hide. She smiled very faintly, and forced. "Alright." She stood and walked slowly and sluggishly through the hallway to her bedroom.

Mickey sighed, gazing at the wall opposite.

He was home, he supposed, back on earth. The atmosphere between the Doctor and Rose had been giving him more than a headache. Yet, as he looked out at the dark, dark window, he couldn't help considering, it didn't really _feel_ like home… He sighed once more, closing his eyes; his head fell onto the table.

He wasn't sure how much time passed, but much too suddenly a loud thumping, a distant banging, woke Mickey from his light slumber.

He stared at the way it was coming; a constant banging on the front door. Then a voice rose, husky and filled with venom, in an accent he couldn't place, "We know you're in there! Come out! We're heavily armed, and not afraid to kill if need be!"

--

His hands were shaking. He had to squeeze them into a tight ball to try and steady them. Swallowing hard, keeping his gaze on the console, he ran his fisted fingers over the levers and buttons. He didn't look anywhere except the knobs, switches, and keys in front of him as he dematerialised the Tardis.

His walk was slow, as he made his way to the captain's chair, slouching into it and staring blankly ahead.

She left him. Rose. Had. Left. Him. The words sounded odd and incoherent in his head. They didn't make sense it that order. Yet, it was a statement of fact. He had single-handedly driven her away from the Tardis.

He knew he was the cause.

He had jumped through a mirror to save a French courtesan he cared about, leaving her stranded on a space station full of clockwork robots trying to kill her, right after declaring – no, _promising_ – he would never, ever leave her. He was a git. He knew that. But to leave him…? He deserved it, yes. He just never thought Rose would…

His eyes closed slowly and gently, staring at the empty dark behind his eyelids. Empty and dark. That's all it really looked like now. Everything stretched out in front of him was empty and dark.

He had always wondered – feared, fretted over, worried – how Rose would be snatched away from him. Would she age after years with him and ask to go home, to settle down? Would she be trapped somewhere unwillingly? Would she di- ?

No. None of those happened. She just left him. Willingly. And it was all his fault, and now she would never know, and she hated him, but nowhere near as much as he hated himself, and now he was alone, and…

He had to snap out of it. He stood up, his mask in place even though there was no one except the Tardis to hide from. And even she could read him as easily as if the mask weren't even there. He could hear her, humming sounds of comfort. They helped little.

He brushed his hands over the console, setting a random place, a random time. Anything to stop it; stop the pain. He would go somewhere – anywhere – and just lose himself in a mystery, in an adventure. He would hide behind his mask while he was there. Forcing a smile. Forcing enthusiasm. Forcing life.

Once the Tardis had materialised he walked groggily toward the door. His movements were slow and slouched as he looked outside. His mouth opened into an expression of surprise. He was staring out into the dark world of London, Earth 21st Century. A place he'd just left. His surprise turned to anger as he waltzed back inside the Tardis.

"That isn't funny," he growled to the Tardis, as he walked up to the console.

His hands were just about to brush over the dials and levers to materialize somewhere else – somewhere specific this time – when something on the screen caught his attention. He frowned, staring at the Galifreyen characters on the monitor. No, that didn't make sense.

Yet, the words in front of him were clear. And the Tardis was never wrong.

He had landed on Earth, London – 21st Centuary, the 3rd of November 2006. Yes, all correct.

But the Doctor had just been outside, seen how deathly dark it was. Pitch black. Night. So why did the monitor read 2PM in the afternoon…?

--Preview--

**Chapter XIV - Old Faces**

__

She felt her hand slipping and tried to tighten her grip. "Help!" she called desperately. "I'm gonna fall!"

"You're already falling Rose," he said quietly, sickly. His voice was a whisper, but she heard it as if he were hanging right next to her. Vaguely, she thought she heard a banging inside her head, a calling of anger and distant threat.

"And it'll just get deeper, and darker, and blacker," the Doctor hissed, an oily smile tipping up his lips.


	14. Old Faces

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K+

* * *

**Chapter XIV - Old Faces **

Rose stumbled into her room, groggy and so tired. For the time being she was happy to let reality disappear into a world her mind would make up. She didn't even care much care if it was a nightmare she'd disappear into; it couldn't be much worse than reality. Her body slumped down onto the bed, her eyes closing.

She stared into the darkness of her lids, waiting for the release of sleep. She wasn't exactly surprised when, at first, it didn't come. She tried to close off her mind. It was at least an hour before her mind finally complied to shut down...

She was standing on a beach; the wind was blowing her hair, the sea stretched out in front of her. She shivered, her eyes falling around the deserted mass of sand, rock and water. She stepped forward, her feet crunching on the wet sand below her.

She sensed rather than heard someone behind her. Rose turned.

And there he was. It was _him_ . Someone she had not seen in… such a long time. His face remained impassive; his blue eyes the only one to give away such raw emotion of untainted desolation. His battered leather jacket, big ears, and short hair stood out, and were both like a knife and a kiss against her heart.

She choked on her words for a moment, her mouth open as she stared at the man.

"Rose," he sighed gently. His voice was as hoarse, deep and gentle as she remembered it. Somewhere in the back of her mind was the flashing warning – this wasn't real, a dream – but she didn't have the will to care much. He smiled at her, that faint smile he had whenever he was correcting her about something simple she hadn't realised. "What are you doing?"

She shook her head, still staring, not understanding.

"You left me, Rose. I thought you cared –"

"I do," she choked out, now aware there were tears running down her face.

"But you left me. I had no one else in the world – just you… and you left me. I'm all alone." He shook his head, his eyes tainted with disappointment as he stared at her.

"No, I didn't. He isn't you, he's –"

The Doctor in front of her interrupted, "He _is_ me, though. I needed you – still do – but you left."

Rose sniffed, averting her eyes from him. She felt a hot tickle as more tears ran down her cheeks. Her throat felt closed off. "He left me," she managed to choke out.

The leather clad Doctor in front of her took a step forward, standing right in front of her. "No," he disagreed. "He – _I _– just saved the world without you for a change. It happens. I've done it countless times before, you know that." His gaze was hard.

Rose's lip quivered. She knew she was dreaming now, as did she know she was wrong. This was so, so much worse than reality. For the man she loved and trusted so much – the man in front of her, not the man she had left – to turn so sour, to look at her in such disappointment…

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I miss you."

"Really?" he replied back, a questioning eyebrow rising. "Not much."

"I do," she insisted. "You would never –"

"Never what?" His eyebrows rose higher. There was a certain mocking note to his tone. "Save history? Or fall in love with someone that isn't you?"

Rose felt a choke sob escape her at his words.

The next words he spoke were calm, but filled with venom. "No, what I would never do is kiss a stupid ape like _you_ in the first place."

Then he disappeared.

Rose felt herself lurch forward, and the ground beneath her disappeared. She fell through the air at the same moment the pain in her heart deepened and bled even more afresh. Her eyes shut tight, and she begged her mind to either wake up, or just die.

When her eyes next opened her hands were caught onto a rock, her body hanging limp from the side of a cliff. She glanced down, but couldn't see the bottom, just darkness. Then she looked up. And there was the Doctor; the _current_ Doctor, with mad brown hair, converses, and a pinstriped suit.

He stood at the top, gazing down at her, his deep, dark brown eyes glazed and full of passionate loath and fury. An anger she had seen, but never before now been on the brunt of.

She felt her hand slipping and tried to tighten her grip. "Help!" she called desperately. "I'm gonna fall!"

"You're already falling Rose," he said quietly, sickly. His voice was a whisper, but she heard it as if he were hanging right next to her.

Vaguely, she thought she heard a banging inside her head, a calling of anger and distant threat.

"And it'll just get deeper, and darker, and blacker," the Doctor hissed, an oily smile tipping up his lips. He leaned down so he was on his knees, his face closer. She could see each line of anger, of loath written over his face. "You've already let go of your life support Rose. Now all you need to do is drown in the darkness."

Then she fell.

Another distant bang, a thump, and Rose woke up gasping.

--

No… Impossible.

The Doctor's eyes widened in shock as he frowned, shaking his head, and ran back outside. Still dark.

Just impossible.

He looked up, and there was the moon, a hovering crescent in the wrong place at the wrong time. The earth was still moving. He could feel it. So, where was the sun? The other side of the world? Had day and night turned backwards?

He turned, blinking through the darkness, when a feeling ran up his spine. An _'oh no, something terrible is happening, or is about to happen'_ feeling. It crawled up to his neck, it gave him a harboured breath, it tickled each of his senses, and it scared him to death.

Without a second thought, he ran to the Powel Estate.

--

"Come on out!" the voice yelled.

Rose heard it, but couldn't understand where it was coming from. She rolled over, but that didn't make sense.

Wasn't she falling down a dark hole? Still falling. Never landing.

She opened her eyes and found her self in bed, in her old room.

The shouting didn't stop. "We're armed and prepared to kill if need be!"

And then another voice. Mickey. "Rose," he hissed, by the door. Rose sat up, blinking furiously. She hopped out of bed, and caught sight of Mickey's panicked expression, "Someone's at the door."

Rose took a deep breath. "Right," she muttered, walking into the hallway, "Best find out what they want at this time of the day, then."

Without another thought she walked up to the front door and opened it with a swift turn of the handle.

"Rose," she heard Mickey hiss.

But her attention was caught on the two smartly dressed men, with heavy guns in their hands, greeting her. One of them – the taller and darker skinned of the two – grinned wickedly before saying, quite calmly, "Ah, finally. We were beginning to regret that our weapons might have been needed, but that isn't necessary now. Don't worry, as long as you do exactly as we say, you'll stay in one piece."

Rose folded her arms across her chest, glancing at the guns in distaste before meeting the taller man's eye, "And why would I do that?"

"Sorry?" the shorter one said, in a rather dumb voice.

"Do as you say?" Rose smirked. "Well, that's not gonna happen. Not with you pointin' guns and threatening me. Not very friendly, is it?"

The taller of them ignored her words, "You're a companion I take it?"

Rose frowned, taken momentarily off guard, "What?"

The man smiled sickly, "Of the Doctor."

Rose stared, horrified. No… How did they -? They couldn't know…

"Oh, we know the Doctor, very well. In fact he and our _company_ go _way_ back."

"Who are you?" Rose whispered.

The darker man smiled again. "An institute formed over a hundred years ago. Arming the human race against aliens and, above all, the Doctor. We're Torchwood Miss. And _you're_ going to tell us where the Doctor is, so _he_ can tell us what the exactly he's done to cover the world in darkness."

--

The Doctor was running. Running through the darkness, his goal the black and tall building of the Powel Estate. But something inside told him he wasn't running fast enough.

But Rose would be all right. Rose _had_ to be all right. She could leave him. She could rip out his hearts. She could give him all the grief she wanted. But she could _not_ be in any danger.

He would not let that happen.

As he reached the steps that led up to the home of his former – his knees almost buckled at the word – companion, he felt the sudden creeping sensation that he was being watched.

His reflexes acted instinctively and he whipped around to find a dark black BMW standing nearby. His hand gripped the stair rail, as he focussed his gaze on the car. He couldn't see inside though. It was much too dark. Even the Doctor's highly trained eyes were only able to tell the colour and type of the vehicle.

Then a voice from behind caused him to turn around, gazing through the darkness at an approaching figure. "Wait, stop!" a female voice called. It was a voice he recognised.

The woman stopped feet away from him, and for one second the Doctor saw the expression of anger evident on her face. As soon as she realised who he was though it disappeared, and her mouth fell open in astonishment and open joy. "Doctor!"

He allowed himself a genuine smile back, "Hello, Sarah-Jane."

* * *

--Preview--

**Chapter XV - An Awful Truth**

_"What are they doing?" he whispered, his voice quiet and desperate._

_"Taking them for questioning. They need information," Sarah Jane whispered back, her eyes still on the figures._

_"What information?" the Doctor murmured._

_Sarah-Jane looked at him, meeting his eye with a sad and regretful expression, "Information on you."_


	15. An Awful Truth

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K

* * *

**Chapter XV – An Awful Truth **

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Rose crossed her arms across her chest, her hard gaze on the tall Torchwood worker in front of her. She glanced at the badge on the man's chest, "Benson."

Benson sighed, propping his gun up and pointing it at her chest. "You were seen. You were seen leaving a blue police box at 13:45 hours. A police box that is highly associated with the Doctor." He grinned, a grim turn up of his thin lips, contorting his face, "And now you're gonna come with us, and tell us all you know."

"And if I don't?" asked Rose, already knowing the answer.

If possible, Benson's smile grew wider, as he held up his gun higher, "What do you think these are for?"

Rose glanced back at Mickey, who was just behind her, staring with wide eyes at the two men. Benson grabbed Rose's arm, as the other man by his side – Hanson, Rose saw on his nametag – shoved his own gun at Mickey's stomach, showing all his pearly teeth as he too smiled wickedly.

Rose whipped her arm away from Benson, glaring at him. "No need to do that. I won't run off," she growled.

Benson laughed, an echoing, throaty sound that rang through the night. "Oh, she's a feisty one!"

He shoved his gun into Rose's back, urging her forward along the flat corridor to the steps. She walked as slow as he would allow, playing for time and trying desperately to think up a plan. Twice she almost fell down the stairs, slowing to almost a stop but pushed hard by the gun pressed firmly against her back. Behind her, Rose could hear shuffling nervous feet of Mickey along with his quick breaths.

For one of the first time Rose suddenly felt a vicious amount of guilt for taking Mickey along. They were supposed to be home; Mickey shouldn't still feel he was in any danger. She sighed, keeping her hand on the dirty rail and her eyes forward. As they reached the bottom, the gun pressed into back harder, leading her to the left.

Rose gave a steady breath, her gaze reaching up to the dark sky. There were few stars, and those that did hang above were small. The only light given away was the crescent moon. She sighed; she had seen so much night and dark, travelling with the Doctor lately, and now even back home. What she wouldn't do for a glance at the sun…

As her steady steps took her further along the pavement, a ghost of movement from by the corner of her eye at the flat buildings caught her attention. Her eyes rested on the wall, noting the dark, moving shadows against the side of the building; a tall shape of a man in a long overcoat. Her eyes grew wide and she blinked, but when her eyes reopened, it had gone.

"Move," hissed Benson behind her, and Rose realised she had slowed to almost a stop.

She moved on, desperately keeping her breath steady. Had that been a figment of her wishful imagination? It must have been. The Doctor was gone; she needed to accept that.

Blinking hard and keeping her untrusting eyes on the ground, Rose move steadily toward the black Torchwood car in the distance.

--

Before the Doctor had been given any chance to question Sarah-Jane on anything at all, she had grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to the side of the Rose's building. Before he was given any chance to protest she put a finger to her lips, her silence causing him to frown and listen hard to the quiet around them.

Sarah-Jane's head peeped out to peer at the entrance to the building, her eyes scanning the area. Then the Doctor heard it; the scuffling of feet and ragged breath, the loud footfalls and persistent shoves. He frowned and leaned around Sarah-Jane, his eyes also on the entrance.

What he saw made his hearts race, his eyes growing wide. His highly trained eyes showed Rose and Mickey being led from the flat by two burly, well-dressed men holding guns to his former companion's backs. It took him every bit of reason not to simply run over there and bring 'The Oncoming Storm' to the men's attention right there and then.

As it was, Sarah-Jane's face, illuminated by the moon, told him it would be unwise to run out there with no plan, demanding Rose and Mickey be released. "What are they doing?" he whispered, his voice quiet and desperate.

"Taking them for questioning. They need information," Sarah Jane whispered back, her eyes still on the figures, which the Doctor could see were now heading to the black car he had seen earlier.

"What information?" the Doctor murmured.

Sarah-Jane looked at him, meeting his eye with a sad and regretful expression, "Information on you."

"Me?" he repeated.

Sarah-Jane exhaled, "They believe you are… responsible for this," she waved her hand to the everlasting night around them.

"Who's they?" the Doctor asked, shaking his head in confusion. "UNIT?"

"No," Sarah-Jane sighed. "They call themselves Torchwood."

"Torchwood…" the Doctor repeated thoughtfully. He had heard that name before. In Scotland, the Torchwood Estate… but that couldn't be connected, could it? That was hundreds of years in the past. Then again, stranger things have happened.

Sarah-Jane was gazing back at Rose and Mickey, as they stopped by the car. Their door was opened, and they were forced to climb in, the two Torchwood workers locking the doors securely behind them before getting into the front.

Sarah-Jane nodded, leaning back and running the opposite direction, "Okay, come on. We'll have to follow them."

She led him behind the building to an old blue Ford car. He climbed in the passenger side without thought, impatient to find Rose. Sarah-Jane kicked hard on the accelerator, and it wasn't long before they saw the Torchwood car in front of them, well exceeding the speed limit.

"So Sarah-Jane Smith, I've got to ask you," began the Doctor, his eyes on the car in front. "What an earth _has_ been going on here?"

"It started about a month ago," Sarah-Jane said quietly, letting her hands do the driving as they followed in the shadows. "The sun went down as normal… but it didn't rise again. It just disappeared. The same happened the other side of the globe too, not just here. The whole planet has been sucked into darkness."

The Doctor shook his head, his brow furring, "But that's impossible! The sun _can't_ just disappear!"

Sarah-Jane shrugged, "Well, I'm afraid it has."

"And Torchwood think I'm responsible for it?"

"Yes, although they seem to think most things are down to you. You were spotted around the time it happened, because it _happened_ right after the incident at that school." She looked at him, and he saw the lines of worry evident on her face. "They're going to ask Rose and Mickey where you are, ask them what they know about you. I'm not sure what Torchwood will do when they don't tell them." Then she smiled wryly, "You must wish you'd gone to do the laundry with her. I assume that's what they were home for."

The Doctor swallowed. "Not exactly."

It was right then that the car in front suddenly slowed to a stop, parking in front of the large building the Doctor knew as Canary Wharf. No one left the car and the Doctor and Sarah-Jane were forced to wait patiently for them to leave.

Sarah-Jane turned back to the Doctor, and was caught suddenly by his pained expression. And the hurt, regretful words he spoke before intrigued her. "What did you mean?" she whispered. "'Not exactly'?"

He looked up at her, his eyes burning with a great and raw pain and darkness hidden inside the deep brown irises. The moonlight shone shadows over a half of his face, paling the other half in contrast. He swallowed, and she saw his jaw lock and unlock as he forced himself to speak. "She left me," he finally whispered hoarsely.

"What?" Sarah-Jane stared, unbelieving. That couldn't be right. Rose wouldn't leave the Doctor. Hadn't their last conversation proved that?

"_What should I do?"_ Rose has asked._ "Should I stay with him?"_

"_Yes. Some things are worth getting your heart broken for."_

Then another thought occurred to her. He may have – must have – already broken her heart. "Why Doctor?" she asked quietly.

The Doctor's gaze was dark as he glanced at her. But then he looked away, his eyes on the car in front, as the two Torchwood officials in front got out of the car.

She wasn't sure she'd ever get an answer.

* * *

--Preview--

**Chapter XVI - Strange Occurrences**

_His smile didn't leave. "You're scared. You don't need to be. Let me help you get what you want. Leave this," he said sincerely._

_His hand reached further and his cold fingers found her cheek. Rose felt herself gasp; the sudden chilling cold of his hand and the feeling of being shocked hit the place he touched her face hard. She saw his face, a look of triumph in his eyes, and felt her lips form the solitary 'no', before he disappeared from view._


	16. Strange Occurrence

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K

* * *

**Chapter XVI – Strange Occurrence **

Rose shivered, the cold air of the room sweeping through her. She clamped her hands firmly down on the desk in front of her, her eyes set ahead at the tall figure of Benson who sat opposite. She could see the thin line of a smile curving up his lips. He leaned forward heavily, his elbows pressing onto the table.

"Well?" his voice cut the silence in the small room.

Rose took her hands off of the table, rubbing them together into a fist and stiffening her body against the cold, but said nothing.

"Tell me where the Doctor is," his harsh voice swept over her again.

"I told you," Rose whispered. "I don't know what you're talkin' about."

Rose had been led into a small dimly lit, white room with the single miss-matched desk in the middle, whereas Mickey had been taken into another room – she assumed, for a similar form of questioning on the Doctor's whereabouts. She had been deliberate and firm in not knowing whom the Doctor was in her answers to Benson.

Not that that had put him at all off track.

He had only grown more and more persistent, and Rose could see his hand inching further toward the gun at his side as he became further irritated by her lack of help.

He rubbed a hand thoughtfully against his face, breathing in through his nose as he stared at her, "Why were seen leaving a blue police box earlier today?"

Rose sighed, looking at him squarely in the face. "I don't know what you're talking about," she spoke slowly and carefully, with the air of telling someone very stupid something very simple.

Benson gritted his teeth, annoyed, and leaned back. Rose watched his hand touch the handle of the gun on belt. His grip tightened around it and he looked ready to make a threat just as Rose heard the click of the door behind her. She turned, and saw a tall, well-dressed woman walk into the room. Her head held high, she had the appearance of someone with high authority, a sinister smile playing over her face.

"Benson," she addressed. "Anything?"

Benson's hand had dropped from his gun and he shook his head. "No. She won't talk."

The woman sighed, and her attention turned to Rose. She smiled sickly, her eyes staring pointedly down at Rose. She stood over the desk, her hands pushed on the table and leaning down. "Hello," she said intently, yet almost patronisingly. "My name's Yvonne. What's yours?"

"Joanna Smith," Rose replied, the fake identity that Benson hadn't asked for already decided in her head.

"Right Joanna, well why don't you and I have a little chat, hmm?" Yvonne waved Benson out of the chair and he rose without any protest, standing back by the door. Yvonne sat down and gave another sickening smile to Rose, her perfectly aligned eyebrows twanging together into a mask of curiosity. "I've heard some fascinating stories, you know. About the man called the Doctor. But I bet you know him much better than I do. What's it like to travel with someone like him?"

"I already told _him_ ," she pointed distastefully at Benson, "I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know any _Doctor_ ." She had told the lie so many times now; it was flowing out of her mouth as easily as any web of truth would.

Yvonne sighed. "Jo – do you mind if I call you Jo?" she gave another vicious smile, and went on before Rose could answer, "– it's really no use trying to hide anything from us. We already know almost everything we need to. All we need to know is where he is. You want to get the world back to normal, don't you? The world is dying – do you want those many deaths on your shoulders?"

Rose attention was rapt on Yvonne. The world was dying? She remembered what Benson had said earlier – the world was in darkness. What did it all mean? What happened in the months she was away? She had to deeply resist the urge to ask what was happening.

Yvonne was staring at her, and Rose realised she was expecting an answer. She opened her mouth to speak, but at that moment there was a rap on the door and a uniformed officer stumbled in, his face contorted in worry. "Ms Hartman," he addressed Yvonne. "There's an emergency. Intruders. Alien life forms."

Yvonne's features lit up in joyous amazement. "Is it him?" she breathed.

"We don't know," the officer admitted. "But there's definitely two life forms of alien origin."

"Two?" Yvonne frowned, shaking her head in clear wonder. She walked toward the door, brandishing her finger a wave for Benson to follow as she did so. The door was shut with a tight crack behind them, and with the click of a lock Rose was left alone.

She sat in the silence for a moment, listening to her the sound of her own whirling thoughts. Then abruptly she stood up, the chair falling over with a clank behind her. She walked purposefully to the door and tried the handle, though not in the least surprised when she found it locked. Her eyes scanned the room, though in finding nothing she couldn't help letting out a groan of frustration. There wasn't even a window in the small, white place.

She ran her fingers back over the door handle, her eyes staring at the small hole of the lock. Her hand suddenly dug into her pocket until she pulled out a small metal hair clip, something she had barely ever used. Her hands bent the metal, her brown eyes staring down as she worked until the clip was straight and thin. She smiled and slid it into the lock, sliding down onto her knees.

She put her ear to the door, twisting her hand back and forth as she fought with the contractions inside the lock. Minutes passed with nothing happening except a rough sound tapping from inside the door, but she continued to twist the thin piece of metal.

Finally she heard the satisfying click and couldn't help smiling, as she pulled the lock back into her jeans pocket and slowly opened the door. The hallway was deserted, the long, white walls, ceiling and floor looking blank and silent. Rose walked quickly to her right, her hand moving across the cool wall.

Her purpose was clear.

If there was a chance that this place – this _Torchwood_ – was going to capture and possibly hurt the Doctor, then she wasn't about to stand back and let that happen. She would have to find him first, and apparently he was already here, so the building she was in was the first place to look.

Her feet took her along the corridor, passing door after door but luckily with not a uniformed Torchwood officer in sight. She stared ahead as she walked, her hair falling around her face, her eyes sharp and determined. Her mind held only one thought, because she knew that if she started to question whether she was doing the right thing, the wise thing, she would falter.

Her ears pricked suddenly. She heard something, something behind her. Her name had been whispered, softly but sternly behind her, in a coursed breath. She stilled, her ears alert and waiting. But nothing else was said.

She turned, abruptly and with a deep frown. "Hello?" she said into the silence, but her voice was barely louder than the one she had heard.

"Hello," came the reply, in the same windy whisper. Rose stiffened, her eyes scanning the corridor. Nothing was there in front of her. She turned back round, her eyes scanning the way she had been headed. But there was still nothing. Breathing through her nose, Rose stared straight ahead, her eyes and ears still the most alert.

All she could hear though was her own beating heart.

Then she sensed it. Right behind her. Her body whipped around and she let out a startled gasp, and small cry.

There was someone standing in the hallway, staring at her, someone who had not been there moments before. He was only a few feet away from her, and she had to assume he was human. She _wanted_ to assume he was human. He was human in shape, although a lot taller than the average male, at about 6'8. He had hay like brown hair going down to his shoulders. His clothing was a simple thin black suit.

And yet, his facial features… Rose couldn't put a finger on it, but they appeared distinctly odd. Each side of his face was too symmetrical, each hair too even, each eye too bright and black. It was almost as if he was trying to hard to simply _be_ .

He smiled pleasantly, taking a step forward and standing directly in front of her. Although his mouth was turned upwards in a smile, his eyes showed a different herd of emotions. He was watching Rose curiously, almost longingly. "Rose Tyler," he said gently, his voice the soft but rough tone she had heard just before. "It is so nice to meet you."

Rose felt her foot slip backwards, her eyes on the stranger. "Who are you?" she said in a tone she hoped sounded demanding.

"That doesn't matter now, does it?" he replied smiling. He lifted a hand, a pale, long and thin hand, up to her. It hovered inches from her cheek, and Rose felt her self lean back, squinting away. "Don't do that," he whispered. "I can give you what you want. What you need. I can show you sense. You can live in a world you want."

Rose backed away from him, frowning. She hadn't understood half of what he had said.

His smile didn't leave. "You're scared. You don't need to be. Let me help you get what you want. Leave this," he said sincerely.

His hand reached further and his cold fingers found her cheek. Rose felt herself gasp; the sudden chilling cold of his hand and the feeling of being shocked flashed over the skin his hand touched. She saw his face, a look of triumph in his eyes, and felt her lips form the solitary 'no', before he disappeared from view.

She was suddenly surrounded by the darkness. A thousand panicked voices and screams echoing around her, then she felt a sudden lurch and pull as something reached for her.

She opened her eyes, and blinked foggily at the room around her.

There was a noise she recognised. A sweet and soft hum. The Tardis hum. She moved slightly, and knew she was warm. And safe.

She saw a white ceiling above her, until she blinked again and a head with a mop of brown hair appeared inches from her own. The Doctor. He grinned at her, his eyes glinting. He pulled back slightly, and she saw his neck and chest were bare. He rolled onto his side, cocking his face onto his elbow and facing her.

"Morning sleepy," he whispered affectionately.

Rose smiled. Of course she was with the Doctor in his bed. It was like every morning.

She frowned – wasn't it?

_Of course it is._

She blinked, startled at the voice in her head, but shook it quickly off as she felt the Doctor kiss her forehead softly. "Rose," he whispered. "Are you okay?" She looked at him, to find his face laced with concern.

She nodded, "Yes." She was. She belonged here. "Just thinking of a dream," she murmured. "Just a vivid little dream." Her brow furred as she tried to remember the dream that she was sure had been so vivid. "There was a… I left because I couldn't trust you, and the earth was all… dark."

The Doctor cupped her cheek in his palm. "But you do trust me."

She nodded instantly. "Always."

He grinned. "And the earth isn't dark… more a greeny-blue." His smile became reasuring. "Don't worry, it was just a dream." Sighing, he pulled her close to him. "Time to come back to reality, I think, hmm? It's much better."

--Preview--

**Chapter XVII - Whispered Voices**

_"No," she whispered. "You saved a woman – another woman – and left me at the… the space station."_

_"What?" the Doctor was confused._

_She looked at him. "You left… you left…" She felt her revelations slipping away._

_"Rose, what are you talking about?" The Doctor's hand cupped her cheek, his face laced with dreadful concern._


	17. Whispered Voices

**When There's No Trust**

**Chapter Rating:** K

* * *

**Chapter XVII – Whispered Voices**

"Right then," the Doctor hopped out of bed, slipping on his trousers. "Better get moving. Mickey will be wondering where we are, and we don't want him on our case, do we?" He grinned cheekily, pulling his shirt over his head and walking for the door. "Coming?"

Rose saw his grin widen before he disappeared into the realms of the Tardis corridors. She stared at the place he had gone for a moment, then looked around their large and luxurious bedroom. On the wooden cabinet beside her were the photographs of her and the Doctor together. His grinning freckled face gazing through the frame, with his arm wrapped securely around her. Rose was smiling widely, though her attention appeared more caught by the Doctor's hands, which were smoothing caresses along her bare arm.

Rose frowned slightly. Why couldn't she remember that?

_Of course you can. _

She blinked. Of course she could remember it. It had been taken only a few weeks ago.

Though, there was that voice in her head again. She shook her head abruptly, deciding she must be going mad. That weird, yet unremembered, dream she had last night had really spooked her out.

Rose slipped out of bed; shivering slightly at the cold outside her safe, warm covers. She slipped on her jeans and t-shirt, her eyes prying around their room. Her and the Doctor's room. It had been that way for months now.

Hadn't it?

_Yes, of course. _

Rose's fingers pressed against her forehead. Of course, this room had definitely been hers and the Doctor's for months. The voice in her head was still whispering words though. Admittedly however, she wasn't all that sure what it was saying.

"Rose?" came the soft call of the Doctor from outside their room, through the winding corridors. "You coming?"

Rose took a steady breath, ignoring the thought of voices in her head and chilled incoherent whispers for now. She walked out their room, making her way through the long and meandering corridors of the Tardis.

She found both Mickey and the Doctor in the console room. The Doctor beamed at her as she entered. "_There_ you are! Now, how would you like to visit a beautiful, tranquil beach in the far reaches of a Masada Planet – a planet running orbit around three suns, and two moons! Its beaches are the envy of the solar system." He grinned, bounding around the console with all of his manic energy. "Well-well-well, _what_ do you say?"

Rose smiled, going over and cupping her hand in his. "Sounds wonderful."

Mickey stood by the Tardis door, sullen. The Tardis lights illuminated the dark irises as he watched the pair, a shadowed half of his face, his jaw gritting down.

The Doctor turned to the morose young man, "Mickey-Mick-Mickity? What're you say? Don't mind if we take a break from the monsters for a while, do you?"

Mickey gave one brief shake of his head, affirming the negative. "No boss," his voice tainted quietly.

The Doctor's hand moved over a lever on the console. "Brilliant," he exclaimed with a grin. And he pulled down the lever.

There was a lurch as Rose fell forward into the Doctor's outstretched arms. He beamed broadly down at her, flicking a switch one handed on the Tardis. The Time Machine came to a sudden halt, and was still.

Rose let go of the Doctor, balancing herself up and turning around. Mickey was picking himself up from the floor, his face agitated. Evidently he had fallen on his backside with no one to hold to, no one to pick him up. Rose felt the sudden urge to help the young man.

She made her way over and offered her hand.

He stared at it for a moment, as if expecting it to suddenly grow several more fingers. His eyes shot up to hers and he glared at her darkly, but offered no move to take the hand she was holding out. Rose blinked, and her arm fell limply to her side.

She felt arms around her waist and felt herself relax into the Doctor's arms. He leaned down his lips against her ear as Mickey stalked over to the door. "Don't worry about him," he whispered soothingly. "Remember, it's just a phase. It'll pass."

Rose tried to focus on his words, and not lose herself in the feel of his breath against her cheek.

Mickey was grouchy, was he always like that?

_Of course. Ever since you have been with the Doctor. _

Rose swallowed, taken momentarily off guard by the voice in her head again. Ignoring the feeling, she felt herself slip her fingers into the Doctor's hand and step towards the door and planet beyond.

Outside it was just as beautiful as the Doctor had described. The sand beneath their feet was soft and warm, stretching out into a wonderful light cream coloured landscape, before it met the sea. The magnificent deep blue waters stretched out to the edge of the horizon, where the three suns hung above. Above the sky was filled with various oranges and reds fixated together to blend a beautiful rainbow sky.

Even Mickey had his mouth slightly parted as he gazed around at the sheer beauty of the place.

The Doctor wasn't looking at any of the scenery though. His eyes were fixed on Rose as she watched the sky and landscape. "Well?" he asked. "Like it?"

Rose looked at him, and her sparkling eyes met his. "I love it."

He beamed at her and went on over the beach, finding a spot not far from the sea and sitting down, motioning Rose to join him. She sat beside him as Mickey went over to the water's edge, picking up near by shells and rocks and rippling the clear blue sea as he threw them into its depths.

The Doctor's hands whispered across her cheek, moving the blonde strands of hair from her face. His eyes showing deep affection as he stared at her. His hand showing tenderness as he cupped her cheek.

With a startling epiphany that made her eyes widen she realised he had done this in her dream. He had brushed her blond hair back, and she had recoiled away from his touch... Why would she do that?

With another burst, she remembered... he had left her. Her eyes grew wider, her gaze fixed on the sand, though she could see nothing past the memories. The memories that weren't memories… were they?

"Rose?" the Doctor's concerned voice broke into her reverie.

She looked up, meeting his confused, concerned gaze. She frowned at him, leaning back, "You left me."

_No! That isn't true._

She heard the voice again – extremely persistent this time – and felt the dream's memories slipping away.

"No," she whispered, begging them to stay. "You saved a woman – another woman – and left me at the… the space station."

"What?" the Doctor was confused.

She looked at him. "You left… you left…" She felt her revelations slipping away.

"Rose, what are you talking about?" The Doctor's hand cupped her cheek, his face laced with dreadful concern.

"A… dream," she muttered.

He smiled at her slightly, gently. "Oh, it was just a dream. I'm not leaving you. I'd never ever leave you."

She looked up, her gaze meeting his. She was frowning though. "Never… ever?" she asked.

"Never, never, never ever," he quipped with a grin. He took her hands in his, looking down at them with a smile. "I took my chance with you," he looked back up into her eyes, "and with not one regret."

––

Sarah-Jane Smith couldn't help but watch, with a mournful gaze, at the man in front of her, as he peeped his head around the corner, his eyes searching the corridors.

He was broken. Something inside him seemed to have vanished, or else been taken. His eyes, so full of light and sparkling with life last time they met, now had an anguished, clouded haze piercing inside them. The zest for life he usually had, had gone. Something had happened when he, Rose and Mickey had left her on Earth that day several months back, and Sarah-Jane only wished she knew what it was.

They were in the building of Canary Wharf, and after several failed attempts to find the room Mickey and Rose had been taken to the Doctor had steadily grown more impatient. His teeth gritted tightly together as he closed firmly shut another door that had turned into another dead end. "They must be here somewhere," he muttered.

Sarah-Jane said nothing, her eyes skirting the corridors for any regretful sign of the people who worked here. They walked quietly through the deserted corridors, their footfalls echoing. As they rounded another corner the Doctor stilled suddenly, and his ears pricked, as came the distant sound of an echoing thumping against a door.

He was running in the direction it had come before he even realised where he was going. Running down a narrow corridor before he came to an abrupt stop at one of the doors. Sarah-Jane was just behind him, watching eagerly as he pulled out his sonic screwdriver. There was a click and the door came bounding open from the inside.

Mickey almost fell out, the Doctor catching him as he lost his footing. He looked up, meeting the Timelord's gaze. His eyes widened in surprise. "Doctor!"

"Mickey," the Doctor addressed. "You alright?" He looked past him, into the room beyond, but all he saw was a single small table and an otherwise empty room. "Where's Rose?"

"I dunno," Mickey said, following the Doctor's gaze. "She was taken somewhere different. Similar questioning though, I guess." His gaze on the Doctor was slightly weary, and he felt oddly as if it had been a very long time since he'd last seen the Timelord, though he knew it had only been a few hours. He then noticed he was stood next to Sarah-Jane. "Hi. You're here too?" He gave her a confused smile.

Sarah Jane opened her mouth to speak, but the Doctor interrupted. "Do you know where she was taken?"

Mickey frowned, "No..."

The Doctor sighed, his feet taking him back along the corridor with his former companions just behind. Mickey jogged to keep up, "Slow down. She'll be alright, as long as Torchwood need that information on you."

"It's not really this _Torchwood_ I'm worried about," the Doctor muttered darkly.

"Oh?" prodded Sarah-Jane, as she took a fast pace beside him.

He glanced at her, before beginning sombrely, "I have a certain level of telepathic ability; I can enter people's minds, and they can enter mine."

"Wait. You can read minds?" Mickey's alarmed voice came from just behind them.

The Doctor ignored him. "There's something here, in this building, that can use telepathy. I can only use mine through contact with another, but this thing is different... I can feel it, trying to wedge its way into my mind. I'm blocking it, I have to, but..." He shook his head. "It's fighting its way in." His brow furred, "I have to find Rose, and get us away from here, so I can think." He placed a hand to his face, wiping it through his hair, and seemingly concentrating very hard.

"There's another alien?" Sarah-Jane asked with a frown.

"Wait... Yeah!" cried Mickey suddenly, pacing himself beside them. "The man questionin' me, he said somethin' about a trespassing alien in the building. That's why he had to leave me in that room."

Sarah-Jane nodded, her strides becoming quicker, "Okay then. It might be better if we split up, the more ground we can – oh, wait!" She stopped suddenly and held up her hand to halt Mickey and the Doctor as they neared a corner, hearing something. The Doctor heard it too. The sound of two people – a male and female – talking animately around the corner.

"Ms Hartman, there's a problem," the male voice atoned. "We've found the source of the alien activity. It's in the building on the second floor, but it has one of the companions."

"So?" there was a hint of impatience in the woman's – Ms Hartman, Sarah-Jane presumed – tone of voice.

"So, we have a sedative to capture the creature and take it to the lab, but it's powerful, and if it hit the girl it could probably kill –"

"That doesn't matter," the woman interrupted. "I told you, I want that thing in the lab by this afternoon. We always have the other one for the whereabouts of the Doctor."

"Yes, ma'am," the male replied. There was a echoing fading of footfalls, and the voices disappeared.

Sarah-Jane turned, swallowing, to the Doctor.

His face was ashen, his eyes wide and terrified. He swallowed down hard, and his fast footsteps echoed loudly as he headed the way the two employees had just gone. His voice was hard, and yet even more broken, as he said firmly to the two behind him, "Come on. Time to save Rose."

--Preview--

**Chapter XVIII - Allusions of a Grandeur**

_Rose took a step back, her lips squashed together into a tight line, her teeth gritted together. She felt her breathing increase and become uneven as the panic inside cascaded into anger. "Stop! Just, take me back! If you – if you don't take me back, right now, I'll -!"_

_A screeching cackling of laughter interrupted her. "You'll what?" he got out between laughter. He took another step forward, his eyes wide with a desperately wild and insane visage that gave the Doctor's face a ghost of vehemence she had never seen before, and hoped she would never see again._


	18. Illusions of a Grandeur

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating:** K

* * *

**Chapter XVI – Illusions of a Grandeur**

"Rose?" the Doctor's voice swam over to her, "You alright?"

She looked up at him. He was smiling delicately at her, his head tilted ever so slightly, his hands placed back on the warm sand. He looked very content.

Rose nodded vaguely, but for some reason didn't take her eyes off of him. He was happy. He was smiling. He was genuinely glad to be in her presence, it appeared. So why was there a numbing, itching prickle in the back of her mind, slowly growing bigger, that was determined that this wasn't right. This wasn't her Doctor.

_But he is._

And there was that horrible little whisper that joined those thoughts a second later. A pinching pain on her forehead with a small but screaming sentence that she couldn't quite understand the words of. It was squashing her doubts into nothing. Rose was steadily realizing that the moment it appeared was the moment her uncertainty was forgotten and blown into the wind.

Something was definitely and acutely amiss.

At the same moment that thought became so much clear in her mind, the soft, pinching whisper in her head came about, but this time she wouldn't let it prevail.

He was still staring at her, as she was at him. And she found herself shuffling slightly closer to him, an evident frown wiring her brow. Her lips stayed straight and resigned, as she watched the smiling, content man wrap his arm lightly around her waist, his mouth casting delicate kisses against her neck.

Yes, this was definitely not real. She was unsure of why she was suddenly so sure; perhaps it was the way his lips moved in only one way over her skin, as if he knew no other, or the way his gaze was just slightly blander than it should be.

Rose pulled back just slightly. She smiled a smile that wasn't real – one he should know wasn't real. He was totally oblivious though; his expression unchanging. Rose tilted her head to the side, and said as nonchalantly as she could, "Um, Doctor, where was it we visited before this beach?"

He frowned at her, his contentedness changing abruptly to confusion like the flicker of a light switch. It was in almost an inhuman manner. Not that he was human anyway, she supposed. "What do you mean? You know where we went on the last trip."

Rose was staring at him, her eyes hard and face impassive as possible. "I know," she replied quietly.

His brow was still pulled into a frown, his expression uneasy. "You remember..." he said, "the school... and then we vised the planet Scurgo, got ourselves in a bit of a pickle but I soon got us out." He beamed.

"And?"

"And that's it."

But Rose hardly heard him... flickers of pictures from the places she thought she saw only in her dreams patted across Rose's mind; like excerpts of vivid memories playing on a film reel.

...A space station... something sharp of a clockwork droid's against her throat... the Doctor, acting like one the drunks she remembered hearing as a child on the Powell Estate, his wine smelling breath against her cheek as he muttered something about bananas in her ear... his shocked, but determined face as he looked upon the time window that would trap him forever... his retreating back as he left, to never return...

Then the wait.

One hour... _he would be back_... two hours... _he had to_... three... _he would be, he would_... four... b_ut then... he _had_ left her_... five long hours... _what if he didn't return? _

Five hours and a quarter... _What if he didn't want to?_

Five and a half... and when all hope was almost gone – he was there. The relief of seeing him again...

But then later, his face; his dark, grieving, defeated face in the console room. His hand was on his ship; he was heartbroken, and so was she, though she'd never tell him...

"_You alright?" _

He looked at her, his face putting up a mask of indifference, but the shiningly dark, haunted eyes giving him away...

"_I'm always alright."_

Being led away by Mickey, her heart torn in small pieces.

"_I'm always alright."_

All she could see was his face as they walked; that face of sorrow and heartbreak and resign and those dark, cloudy eyes...

"_I'm always aright." _

The ghost of his echoing words were so taunting as they replayed in her head....

"_I'm always alright."_

He wasn't alright.

The fact of the matter was he had fallen in love, and had his heart broken.

The script of memories moved further forward; she was avoiding him, she was breaking her own heart by watching him from afar, replaying him leaving over and over in her mind. She was confused. Upset, because he was, for several days, a broken man. But more upset because he had left her alone on a space station with Mickey and no real way out. And she hated herself much much more than she hated him, or anyone else, for those feelings to be registering.

Her Doctor had left her on a space station years and years in the future with nothing but a terrified ex-boyfriend, a time machine she could not work, and a fleet of murderous clockwork droids.

This man on this beach with his arm around her had not.

Oh, she wanted to forget now. She wanted to live a life with this Doctor – the-Doctor-who-wasn't. But that was impossible. Because this wasn't real.

Her eyes graced over the Doctor; his weight leaned on his right hand as he tilted a head at her, the corners of his mouth playing upwards, his eyes affectionate but intense, staring like she was the most wonderful, magnificent -

Not real. Any of it.

Rose abruptly stood up. She stood above him, and stared down at his startled face gazing up at her. "You're not real," she whispered in a voice she wished was harder.

"What?" He gave a small confused laugh. "Rose, honey, what are you talking about?"

Had he just called her honey? Definitely not the Doctor.

She shook her head. "Whatever you are... what – whatever this is..." She stared steadily at him for a moment, "you can't fool me." Her eyes wondered around the beach determinedly, as if expecting to find something other than the sand and sea. Mickey, she noticed, had disappeared, almost as though he had never been there in the first place. "Just take me back," she stated, her gaze back on the man who looked like the Doctor.

He stared at her. Both his humor and concern had vanished. He was now gazing at her with dark and brooding eyes, his lips a thin line and his body rigid.

"Why?" he asked, and his voice had changed. It didn't belong to the Doctor, yet it was one she recognized. A soft, stern, but coursed whisper she knew she had heard before.

Rose swallowed, her gaze still steady on him. "Just take me back," she repeated quietly.

He shook his head incredulously at her. "Oh, but Rosie Tyler... everything you have ever wanted is right here," he said, with the air of telling her something she should already know.

Rose shook her head swiftly from side to side. "No. Take me back. Take me back home."

The man's lips turned upwards in almost a pitying smile. His eyes moved swiftly to the blue police box several meters to their left, before returning to Rose. "But Rosie," he said sickly. "Earth isn't your home. You know that." He looked at her in the same manner as a teacher explaining something very simple. Then his foot took a step forward and he advanced, his penetrating gaze becoming black and dangerous.

Rose took a step back, her lips squashed together into a tight line, her teeth gritted together. She felt her breathing increase and become uneven as the panic inside cascaded into anger. "Stop! Just, take me back! If you – if you don't take me back, right now, I'll -!"

A screeching cackling of laughter interrupted her. "You'll what?" He took another step forward, his eyes wide with a desperately wild and insane visage that gave the Doctor's face a ghost of vehemence she had never seen before, and hoped she would never see again.

His hand reached out and touched her face. It was nothing like the affectionate caresses he had performed before, masked as the Doctor. She flinched back in shock. It was freezing. "Little child," he whispered, his hand forcefully pressing on her cheek so she couldn't back away. "I wanted to give you everything. Everything your delicate little heart has ever dreamed of. All your Doctor here wanted to do was love you. But... now you don't want that." His soft tone was sure and matter of a fact, his gaze turning disproving, and brow furring in dislike. "Hmm, no, now you say you want to go back to the man who betrayed you. Left you all alone. And not just left you. Left you for another pretty human." His smile, with the Doctor's lips, turned upwards sickly. "A _prettier_ human."

Rose didn't say anything. She swallowed hard and just watched the Doctor's lips move. He was close to her, his face inches from hers, and his mouth flexing by the ridge of her jawline. It was as if she was watching a program where the speech was out of sync with the lips; even though his lips were moving at perfect rhythm, the sound of the cruel words leaving his mouth didn't match the face of the Doctor's; the face she knew so well. This wasn't the Doctor, and it wasn't his thoughts on the matter – she knew that – but for some reason that didn't quite diminish the cruelness of his words, and the pain that came with them.

"Oh Rosie," he began in a sickly sweet voice . His expression suddenly became a mixture of mocking and pity, his eyes widening and brow opening as if she were a homeless person he felt particular sorry for and was about to give money to, but with a mocking, pleased and snobby agenda. "You're so sad..." he said softly, his throaty voice and husky breath feeling dirty against her face, nothing like the Doctor should feel with his lips there."I could have given you so much love." He shook his head, and she felt his hair brush her cheek. "No more though. Now... something different."

He stepped back suddenly, his posture put up to his full height. Rose stared at him. She felt her entire body stand rigid. "Who are you?" she whispered.

"I am your illusion," he replied. "And you are my subject. I must say you worked it all out quicker than you should have... you shouldn't have at all, really." He frowned, staring at the perfect blue sea Rose had momentarily forgotten about, lost in thought. "Oh well!" he turned abruptly back to Rose, and sighed heavily. "No matter. Though this time I'm afraid it won't be so pleasant," he said regretfully. "Although, don't try not to look too much into things this time, hmm? It ruins all the pleasantries."

With that, he clicked his fingers and their world turned into darkness.

* * *

--Preview--

**Chapter XIX - Touching Insanity**

_It seemed the only thing that she could move was her eyes, rolling abruptly from place to place in their sockets. She tried to move her arm, but she wasn't sure she had any. She couldn't feel it. Couldn't feel anything.__  
_

_Just as a mild amount of fresh panic began to worm its way into her brain, a recognizable, sickly voice rang by her ear. "Scared, Rosie?" Loud and yet soft, the sound swam to her as if his mouth was poised right next to her right ear. Then a cackling chuckle. "I would be. You're paralyzed sweetie. The toys are all there, but nothing's working."_


	19. Touching Emotion

**When There's No Trust**

**Chapter Rating:** T

* * *

**Chapter XIX – Touching Emotion**

It was dark. It was dark, but Rose thought she might have spent her entire life in the dark. No, not just the dark, but the cold and the dark. She had the mild inclination that her cheek was squashed against something smooth, hard and freezing cold. But as for the rest of her body, she had no idea. She could feel nothing from the neck down.

Her vision was dark and hazy; there was nothing to see around her but black eerie shapes through the loom. It seemed the only thing that she could move was her eyes, rolling abruptly from place to place in their sockets. She tried to move her arm, but she wasn't sure she had any. She couldn't feel it. Couldn't feel anything.

Just as a mild amount of fresh panic began to worm its way into her brain, a recognizable, sickly voice rang by her ear. "Scared, Rosie?" Loud and yet soft, the sound swam to her as if his mouth was poised right next to her right ear. Then a cackling chuckle. "I would be. You're paralyzed sweetie. The toys are all there, but nothing's working."

Rose had an inkling he was playing with something of hers beyond her blurry, black eyesight when he said this. A limb. Maybe an arm, or maybe a leg. If he was, she couldn't feel it. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing happened.

He chuckled again. Whether he was still in the form of the Doctor, she couldn't tell. "You can't talk. You chattering away? Sorry, honey, but that would be a tiny bit annoying, wouldn't it?" He didn't sound in the least bit sorry.

Rose opened her mouth again. The two syllable word '_bastard' _was just on the tip of her tongue, but refused to appear in all its blaspheme glory.

"Well, you're paralyzed from the neck down anyway. Which, luckily for you, means you can feel no pain from here," he said, and she felt a prickle against the upper part of her neck and flinched. He chuckled, "to here," his shadow disappeared and she imagined he was touching her foot. He bent down and she suddenly felt his dry breath warm against her eyes. "Bet you wish you didn't know what's going now, don't you?" he whispered.

– –

The Doctor waltzed around another corner, the bleary white walls and plain grey doors becoming something of a numbing repetition. The amount of corridors the Torchwood building held was getting a little ridicules. Behind him, Sarah-Jane and Mickey followed; their footsteps and slightly panting human breaths were a slightly comforting sound in his panicked brain. Just as he was really beginning to grow impatient of all the empty dead ends and repeating hallways, a noise ahead startled him.

It sounded like laughter. A short bark of glee and excitement from a corridor ahead to their right. Wasting no time, the Doctor was racing toward the noise. As he rounded the corner, the Doctor saw two figures in the middle of the corridor. One was a man, his hand held against the wall, his hay-like thick brown hair falling down his face. The other of his hands was gripping, quite tightly, onto Rose's forehead.

Rose was slouched across the floor as the man leered over her; his eyes glazing on her, his features blank except the huge smile sly on his face. Rose's eyes were closed, and her face pale and resigned.

The Doctor marched over, his footfalls were slight and, though his breathing was hollow, he was carefully quiet as he crept through the corridor, Mickey and Sarah-Jane inches behind him. The sly man in front of the Doctor spoke without looking round. "I've been expecting you."

The Doctor stopped a few meters away from him. "Let her go." His voice was laced with ice.

The man glanced away from Rose's prone form, his eyes settling on the three figures glaring at him. "Ah, the great Doctor. It's so nice to finally meet in person. After searching through all these wonderful memories of you, I have been so looking forward to getting together in the flesh and blood. I'm Haland. Pleased to meet you."

He smiled pleasantly at the Timelord, dropping to his knees so he was holding a firm hand on Rose's forehead, with head tilted towards the Doctor.

The Doctor glared back at him, his eyes black.

"What are you doing to her?" Sarah-Jane asked in a small voice, gesturing at Rose and quite horrified.

Haland gave a startled glance at her, as if only just noticing she and Mickey were there. He looked back at Rose, his fingers digging a little tighter into her head. "Oh, Rosie? At the moment we're just playing a little game. She has to guess where she is. She's no genius, but she is rather smart when she wants to be, I'll admit. Honestly though, she can't half scream."

The Doctor's teeth gritted together tightly, and he took a stride forward.

"What did you do with the sun?" Mickey suddenly asked from behind.

Haland laughed. "What did I _do_ with it? Nothing. It's you lot who are blind."

"Its an illusion," the Doctor stated surely, his gaze was still black on Haland.

"Ooh, you _are_ smart!" he grinned. "Then again, you're not one of them, are you Timelord? One of those little, blind apes."

The Doctor took another stride forward, now only a few meters from Haland and Rose. "Why are you doing this?"

Haland just shrugged, grinning. "Why not? Earth's full of easily frightened, little creatures. All I had to do was create a tragedy... oh, and their fear," he grinned, his eyes closing for a moment of ecstasy. "So delicious."

"You feed off of fear. The energy given off by so many frightened people," the Doctor spat. He sounded disgusted.

Haland shrugged nonchalantly. "Happiness, sadness, anger... it's all consuming. But, yes,_ fear._.." he grinned particularly widely. "That is a glorious emotion to feed." He tilted his head to the side. "You're afraid, too. I can feel your blocks Timelord, gnawing against my brain, but the emotion is still there. And _oh,_ so much emotion! Fear, excitement, love, anger – hmm, much anger – and loneliness..." He gave the Doctor a look of intense awe, his grip momentarily loosening on Rose's forehead. "You really are something to feed from."

The Doctor swallowed, his stare heavy on the alien in front of him. "Why are you doing this to Rose?" he asked quietly, his voice unnaturally and dangerously calm. "She's done nothing. Controlling her mind's eye... that's not fair."

"But don't you see? I'm helping her!" Haland insisted. He sighed. "Well, I was. I tried. I heard this place – this _Torchwood_ – was trying to figure me out. Only would have been a matter of time, too. So, I came to investigate. And then I found her," he said softly, and his gaze turned to Rose. "And her emotions... there was little fear. Only hurt. So, so much hurt. Betrayed. Wounded." His gaze turned sharply back to the Doctor. "When people hurt it's not nearly as delicious as happiness, or fear. So, I decided to help her. Give her what she wanted. Hearts content." He slowly turned back to Rose, his gaze soft before he suddenly scowled. "But then she had to ruin everything! Figure it out! There was no other choice. She would not be happy in her mind anymore, and I was so very hungry. Things had to become a bit more... _scary_ for her."

The Doctor took another step forward, his hand was in one of his pockets, fingering his sonic screwdriver. Behind him, he could hear the heavy, reluctant breaths of Mickey and Sarah-Jane. "Haland, you can't keep doing this. This is your last warning. _Let her go_."

Haland stared at the Timelord for several moments, something thoughtful playing across his face. Gently and with great reluctance he took his hands from Rose's forehead. Her head slumped to the floor, her eyes still closed and her body remaining perfectly still. Haland took several steps back, walking slowly backwards with his eyes still on the Doctor. "I heed your warning," he said quietly. "But this is by no means over." With that, Haland turned and down the corridor, rounded the corner and out of sight.

"You didn't stop him!" Mickey exclaimed, as soon as he'd vanished.

The Doctor barely heard though, already kneeling by Rose. Her face was a pearly pale white, his chest clenched as he watched her fluttering eyelids and trembling lips. Her chest rose and fell in a perfect rhythm and his sensitive ears could pick up the gentle thudding of her heart. He was suddenly overwhelmed by the pure humanness that was Rose, alive and here. The impact of just a few hours away from her was plaguing him.

"Doctor," he heard Sarah-Jane behind him, and he was suddenly brought back from the aliveness and beauty that was Rose Tyler.

He turned to the two humans standing and waiting behind him. They were both watching him, worried. "She's okay," the Doctor reassured them. He stood up, turning to Mickey. "And I haven't let him go. He isn't going anywhere, trust me, he's not leaving this building."

Mickey frowned. "Why?"

"He needs to know what's going on at Torchwood," Sarah-Jane guessed.

"Right," the Doctor nodded. His eyes swept down to Rose before he looked back up. "I had to make sure she was okay. But she is, and ah, well now we're gonna have to find him again."

"Split up?" Mickey suggested.

The Doctor nodded. "Seems like an idea. You two can head off down there," he pointed the way they had come, "If you find him, make sure he doesn't touch you. You're aware at the moment, aware of what he can do, so he won't be able to build the illusion _around_ you. Not without touching your forehead, but be careful."

"And what're we suppose to do if we find him?" Mickey asked sceptically. If he noticed the Doctor was deliberately keeping Rose close to himself, he didn't show it.

"Oh, just humor him for a while. Don't worry, I'll be right there."

"And when you get there... you have a plan, do you?"

"I always have a plan," the Doctor insisted, then he frown slightly, "...well, except when I don't. But I definitely do today... well, near enough. Sort of. Nearly... Maybe."

Sarah-Jane laughed. "We'll see you soon." With that she grabbed Mickey's arm and wheeled him away.

"Absolutely," the Doctor said, nodding after them. He then bent down and touched his fingers to Rose's cheek. "Right then, Rose? Wanna wake up, maybe?"

She did not stir, and he sighed gently before lifting her up into his arms. He was surprised at how light she was, and wondered briefly when the last time she had eaten had been. He treaded carefully in the opposite direction the two humans had gone, rounding the corner into a white, bland, familiar, yet also unfamiliar, corridor.

Doors littered the walls, and as the Doctor walked further he began to detect a small but sure beeping occurring every few seconds. His mind reeled as he tried to decipher in his mind what the noise could be.

His answer came with a sure and designated wave of panic as his eyes addressed a small device located in the middle of the corridor. It was a similar shape and size to what he had in his hands the first time he met Rose Tyler.

As his mind screamed the words '_run, bomb!'_ in utmost horror, the Timelord's feet were already turning and fleeing as the beeping ticked off the seconds in his ears.

--Preview--

**Chapter XX - Licking Flames**

_"I left you," she started rather sadly. The atmosphere tensed so suddenly it was as if the air had been sucked out of the small room._

_The Doctor didn't say anything for a moment. "Yes..." he finally uttered gently, full of regret, but he failed to say more._

_"After you left me," Rose continued quietly._

_Slowly, the Doctor simply nodded his head, giving no further comment._


	20. Talking in Tight Places

**When There's No Trust**  
**  
Chapter Rating:** K+

* * *

**Chapter XX – Talking in Tight Places**

As he ran for his life, Rose clutched in his arms, legs working overtime, the Doctor's brain began calculating. He was about six stories up, but had no idea when the device would go off, only that it would. And soon, most probably. He went as fast as he could, but Rose was weighing him down; lighter she might be, but he was still unable to take a proper run with her clutched in his arms.

Looking down, he saw her eyes twitching, half open; she appeared to be waking. Three stories down, as he jogged down the last few steps of a stair case, his mouth opened to speak to her, when the building suddenly shook. He fell to the floor, automatically shielding Rose's body with his own. The building continued to shake, the floor vibrating beneath him. His eyes adjusted to the light and above him the Doctor saw a door open to his left.

Remembering a time long ago when a small confined space by a doorway had saved their lives, the Doctor half crawled toward the doorway, consciously aware of the shuddering around him but refusing to look towards the damage, the hallow roaring in his ears was almost deafening. The heat was all consuming.

Throwing cation to the wind, he crawled into the narrow space, lowering Rose quickly to the ground and shutting the door tightly. He held Rose close to his chest for a moment, teeth gritted as he waited patiently for the shaking to stop. A hallow crashing, a roaring, was screaming outside, though it sounded far away. The floor vibrated violently. He thought of Mickey, Sarah-Jane... and hoped with everything inside him they were okay. His eyes closed and he waited, as the ground shook and intensified, and the noise grew...

When suddenly, it all stopped. For a couple of moments the Doctor didn't move. Then slowly, he brought Rose away from his chest, settling her on the floor of the tightly compact cupboard they were in. Her eyes were closed again, peaceful.

He stood, listening intently to the silence, and walked to the door, trying to open it, careful to use the hem of his sleeve. But the door wouldn't give. It was shut firmly; the door wasn't locked, so clearly it was constricted by something on the other side of the door.

He gave another hard shove, again and again, but to no avail. "Damn it," he muttered. He looked around the tiny room they were in; a small shelf, a mop and bucket, and Rose, sprawled unconscious on the floor.

His hand went to his forehead as he dropped to the floor, leaning against the door, trying desperately to think of a way out.

As his thoughts rolled around his brain, going more in circles than anything else, opposite him Rose eyes fluttered, her head stirring. He stared at her for a long moment, unknowing if she would be upset to see him or...

Her eyes flickered open, and landed on him. And it didn't matter. For the longest moment, where he was sure time must have stood still, the Doctor could do nothing but stare at her. Her brown eyes, eyes he thought he might never see again, shined and glistened bright and wide. Her blond hair hung around a side of her face, casting shadows over her cheeks. Her mouth was parted just slightly. She was staring at him like she was seeing a ghost.

"Hello," he whispered, smiling just slightly despite himself.

"Hello," she whispered back, her voice slightly coarse. "Where... where are we?" she croaked, quiet and confused.

The Doctor's eye contact broke. He looked around the confined space, hand reaching behind his neck. "We're in a cupboard," he said bluntly.

"I can see that." If her voice rose ever so slightly, coming a little more snippy than she intended, she decided it was his own fault.

"Canary Wharf, or rather Torchwood tower... There was a minor... explosion; now we're sort of trapped and might be in here a while, either until they find us, or I come up with some brilliant plan."

She looked around them and frowned. "What about Mickey? Is he...?" She stared at him, and he could see she was scared for her ex-boyfriend.

"Fine," the Doctor lied quickly. "He's fine." He had a feeling that statement was going to come back to kick him hard where it hurt later. But he couldn't tell Rose he didn't know if Mickey was even alive at the moment, never mind if he was 'fine'. He put back his head against the wall, watching her with concern clouding his eyes. Rose refused to meet his gaze, watching the door instead. "You okay?" he asked eventually.

She glanced at him, her eyes darting quickly back to the door a second later. "I guess."

"You sure? I mean... that man, he put images in your mind. A kind of illusion set up in your head. It was made to be very real. I was afraid there might be side effects." He hesitated before continuing, "How are your memories? Any lost?"

Rose shook her head. "Don't think so." There was a short pause as she continued to stare ahead. "I left you," she started rather sadly. The atmosphere tensed so suddenly it was as if the air had been sucked out of the small room.

The Doctor didn't say anything for a moment. "Yes..." he finally uttered gently, full of regret, but he failed to say more.

"After you left me," Rose continued quietly.

Slowly, the Doctor simply nodded his head, giving no further comment.

Rose took a large intake of breath, and looked straight on. "You were there..." she murmured in a voice slightly detached. "In the dreams; the good ones. You were there with me."

The Doctor just stared at her, not really sure what to say. "Oh."

"You didn't leave," she whispered so quietly, he had to lean in to hear her. "I didn't leave." She paused sadly, opened her mouth again but nothing came out. She shut her mouth and they sat in silence for a while, the air around them thick, the silence all consuming. The Doctor wondered what was behind the door he was leaning against. Would someone find them, or was his brilliant plan – as soon as he came up with one – going to save them? "How long have we got?" Rose asked eventually, quietly. "Until our air runs out."

The Doctor quickly turned around to stare at the door for a moment. "Oh, what are you talking about? We have air. Air coming in, air going out."

But Rose just stared at him, and he could tell she knew... whatever was constricting their way out, it was constricting their air supply as well.

Again, the Doctor broke their gaze and waved a hand absentmindedly. "Oh, a while yet."

"Doctor," Rose abolished, annoyed and disappointed. She noticed the way he pulled on his ear lobe, as he always did when lying.

His gaze caught hers again, and they were momentarily trapped in each others eyes.

"An hour. Perhaps less," he murmured softly.

Rose nodded, before she was the one to break their contact. She stared at the door.

Then, for a long while, there was only silence. The Doctor's thoughts wondered still to Mickey and Sarah-Janelistened for the sound of confused shouts and scared screams, but none came. Just the silence, screaming in desolation into his ears. A mocking outrage of nothing. Nothing he felt he could say to break it.

Just tense air.

"You were pushin' me away," Rose murmured eventually. Her gaze cut him; hurt, but all anger seemed lost.

Startled though he was by her sudden jab, he didn't, couldn't, deny it.

She stared at him. "You don't have to spend your whole life alone."

He looked at her with a sudden deadly intensity. His eyes delved, darker and brighter than she had ever seen them, and momentarily full, full of anguish, of loss, and of all the horrors he'd seen in his long life. The look stated all he could without words. He did have to. He had to be alone.

Rose looked across at him. Her throat constricted and she found herself keeping down a sob from the bottom of her chest as she stared at the broken man. She took a steady breath. "I know... I know, curse of the Timelord's and all that... but..." she hesitated, "if you never let anyone in, you'll spend your entire life alone. Alone with nothing. Forever. Even in the bits in between." She paused. He stared at her, his gaze intense, but his face now blank, anguished. "You know what they say... it's better to have loved and lost..." she trailed off and bit her lip, a little fearful. She wondered if by mentioning the 'L' word she'd just knocked down further, the walls that were rebuilding.

"Than never to have loved at all," the Doctor only finished in a gentle, coarse whisper.

With a jolt of grief and hurt Rose was suddenly reminded of Reniette through the statement and the look in the Doctor's eyes. She looked down at the sodden cupboard floor. "Did you..." her voice caught for a moment, and she almost choked but didn't. Rose took another steady breath. "By leaving me, you were pushing me away? For Reniette."

He stared at her, and sighed gently. "It wasn't like that."

"She loved you."

"Yes."

Rose said nothing for a long while. "You loved her," she then said softly. Stating not asking.

The Doctor said nothing, but then when his reply came it was both just slightly defensive and rather surprised. "It's a bit more complected than that."

"Well, we don't seem to be doing much else in here." She waited for him to speak, but he said nothing. His gaze was hard on the floor, "Please doctor... talk to me," she pleaded. But he still stated nothing and she sighed, turning her head away, suddenly not able to look at him either.

"I never meant to hurt you," he whispered, and his voice was so broken Rose had no choice but to look back up at him. He was staring at her, and she was both surprised and saddened to find his eyes were sparkling with tears he'd never shed, deep regret and sorrow darkening them. "I would never..." he choked slightly upon the last word. Rose had to resist the urge to put out her hand to him. "I'm so sorry," he said louder.

It was the first time he had apologized for leaving her alone on the spaceship, and although she thought he might not have realized it, she certainly did.

Her lip quivered. "Me too," she mouthed without sound, too afraid of what choked sound would come out of her mouth to speak out loud.

"Rose." Her name came out as a hidden meaning of sorrow. The Doctor shuffled over to her, his cold, soft hands gently cupping her cheek. He opened his mouth to speak, "Rose," he began, "I –"

And was promptly interrupted however, by the door behind him crashing open.

* * *

-- Preview --

**Chapter XXI - Licking Flames**

_...he tightened his grip on Rose's hand; amongst the fear, and calculations of how far they were exactly from the exit, there was the impossible pleasure of having her hand fit so easily into his. She was here with him. Only now did he realize how much her leaving had hurt him, had really cost him. And only now did he realize that he never wanted to let go of her hand again. Never again. They had behaved like children for too long now. It was time to end it. It was time to tell her how he really felt._

_As they ran, he told himself she was not reluctant to hold his hand either; and if she was, she did not show it._


	21. Licking Flames

**When There's No Trust**  
**  
Chapter Rating:** K+  
**  
A.N:** Thanks for the reviews everyone, and I'm so sorry this is so late; think this as an Xmas present. I'm a bit worried about this chapter though; I wrote it at two in the morning and it's a little different from the others. But, as always, you're the judges. I'm predicting three more chapters left, then it's over...

* * *

**Chapter XXI – Licking Flames**

The words, from deep within both of his hearts, died violently on the end of his tongue as the door swung fiercely open. His eyes closed for a moment, squinting, as an eclipse of a man stood in front of the doorway, coughing and spluttering, with an array of golden flames behind him.

"Rose! Doctor!" he got out, his hand covering his mouth, grey fumes swirling threateningly behind him, amongst the yellow and red flames licking the walls. His head raised, and the Doctor saw through his haste to stand that it was Mickey standing in front of them.

For an odd moment he felt an irrational surge of annoyance towards the boy, interrupting he and Rose when he did. But it quickly changed to relief when he reveled in the fact that Mickey, at least, was alive. But where was Sarah-Jane?

"Quick," Mickey muttered and coughed into his hand, his voice muffled.

The Doctor did not hesitate, grasping Rose's hand and pulling her up, they left the tiny room, toward the flames brutally snaking through the building. It was much worse than he expected. Flames danced through the corridors, but what was most terrifying was the smoke smearing its way through the dust and ruble of fallen walls and doors. A grey mist hung through the corridors, eating at their chests.

They turned left, running but keeping as low as possible as the smoke streaked across their faces. The Doctor turned to Mickey as they reached the stairs, one hand shielding Rose down in a protective manner, the other covering his nose. "Where's Sarah-Jane?" he managed to ask the boy.

"She's fine," Mickey spluttered a yell to the Doctor, rushing down the angled, rubbled stair case, "I got her out!"

The Doctor nodded quickly and shakily, feeling an odd sense of pride for the man stumbling beside him. Around him the smoke filtered through, as if following them. The dust and debris fell from the roof, all the more evidence of a crippling building.

They needed to get out. And soon.

"How did you find us?" the Doctor asked Mickey as they stumbled down the stairs.

"I heard you," Mickey croaked quietly, but loud enough for the Doctor to hear him.

And the Timelord couldn't help wondering, as they ran down through the building, down steps and through corridors, how much exactly Mickey had heard.

Then more rational thought took over and he tightened his grip on Rose's hand; amongst the fear, and calculations of how far they were exactly from the exit, there was the impossible pleasure of having her hand fit so easily into his. She was here with him. Only now did he realize how much her leaving had hurt him, had really cost him. And only now did he realize that he never wanted to let go of her hand again. Never again. They had behaved like children for too long now. It was time to end it. It was time to tell her how he really felt.

As they ran, he told himself she was not reluctant to hold his hand either; and if she was, she did not show it.

It could have been this, this fleeting lapse of concentration, that momentarily stilled the Timelord senses that would have foreseen the following outcome; that would have seen the large piece of debris, the wall above collapsing right toward them, or rather, right toward _him_.

Rose saw it though. As if in slow motion, the licking flames ghosting around them illuminated clearly the barriers of the wall by them, breaking and falling towards the Doctor. Rose let out a cry, a howled scream of his name, as she pushed her body forward, unclasping their sweaty hands from one another and shoving him out of harms way. For a single second she saw his falling figure, startled and horrified, tumbling away from her. And all she felt in that second was her heart's cry of numbing relief. It's alright. He was _okay_.

Then the walls collapsed upon her. There was a sudden numbing pain around her. And everything went dark.

As he stared at the crashing of concrete on her frail form the Doctor heard himself scream. His body reacting with a anguished cry, his eyes as wide as saucers; it was nowhere near as loud, though, as the screaming in his head. He did not know for sure if the hollow roaring in his ears was the desolation of screams in his head, or the terrible thundering of rubble and metal.

Somewhere, Mickey was shouting. Somewhere else, the smoke was rising; the flames licking. But he couldn't hear it. Couldn't see it. He crawled and ran and rolled to her, screaming her name and clawing at the concrete. He pulled and pushed and scraped the walls off of the girl, his hands becoming bloody, his eyes beginning to water. As his scarlet blood-stained hands found soft, deathly pale skin, he worked harder. Not thinking, just working.

Then he reached her face and she was staring at him, and for one grief-stricken, heart stopping, roaring minute he thought there was nothing in the eyes. He thought they were glassy, empty. Then she blinked down slowly, looking up at him, and he almost choked on the released breath of relief. Her eyes drooped, her lips shivered, but she stared up at him. Her mouth opened and closed, and the Doctor continued to claw away at the remains of the rubble.

"It's okay, Rose. Hold on, have you out of there in no time," he said in false bravado.

He heard her take an intake of short quick breath and something of a gasp and a choke left her lips. Then he heard her speak, so soft, shaking, but he still heard it. "Tired," she whispered. "So sleepy."

"No, Rose. No, no, no," he chimed to her, tears bridging the corners of his eyes. "No sleep, Rose. You're not tired, come on. You can't sleep or I - I'll –" he spluttered on his words, "I'll be lonely, won't I?"

But even as he spoke, Rose's eye lids drifted to a close. "Doctor," her hoarse voice croaked. "I'm... so sorry." Her lips shivered, and the Doctor's senses pricked alarmingly as her heart flailed; so slow, slower...

Then she was still and limp, and as cold as ice.

With stinging eyes and shaking hands, the Doctor fumbled, placing two fingers against her neck, desperately seeking a pulse.

There was none.

He screamed. "_NO!_"

Taking immediate action, he quickly shoved a quivering hand into his pocket and pulled out the sonic screwdriver. Clicking the setting, he shoved the device onto her chest and pulsed her heart, her still muscle, with a burst of energy. Her body convulsed, before falling limp. His hands slipped back to her pulse point. Nothing. He repeated it... still nothing. Then his lips found hers and he desperately breathed into her, again and again, practically kissing her back to life.

Tears were trailing relentless down his cheeks now, whispering marks against his sooty face. Behind him, somewhere, he was dimly aware of Mickey, coughing and crying and repeating his name. Aware of the smoke surrounding him, slowly filling his lungs, but not effecting him because of his Timelord physiology.

"Come on... Come _on!_ Please, don't leave me again. _Please_," he was calling to her as he shoved his hand to her chest, doing compression after compression. "Rose, come on. Just... don't go - please, don't -!"

He was sobbing relentlessly now, yelling and screaming through mind numbing panic.

He was aware of Mickey's hand on his shoulder, of the screaming and shaking behind him, of the flame's warmth surrounding them, but also not aware. Rose's still form - her chilled blue lips, her closed lids, her bloodied head – was all he could see. She was not breathing. There was no pulse... but he could not give up!

Taking in all the clean air he could, he dipped his lips back over hers.

"Doctor! Doctor!" Mickey screamed, pulling on his shoulder and almost choking through the grey fumes. "We've gotta get her out of here! The smoke -" he choked again, momentarily unable to speak, "the smoke's making it worse! Come on, Doctor! Please!"

The Doctor heard him this time. Heard him and registered it. He was right; the smoke was a primary problem. As he lifted her quickly but gently into his arms, the Doctor was conscious that there might be internal injuries throughout her body. But that would not matter unless he got her out. Now.

He had to get her out. He was disbelieving that anything would happen as long as she was out of the building. Tripping and flailing through the corridor ahead of Mickey, he allowed a small amount of relief when he saw the exit in front of him. Shoving through the double doors, and running to the grass, laying Rose's limp form and pushing his hand against her chest, the Doctor was barely aware of the fact that the sun, that had not been seen for several months, was now shining in the sky.

Sarah-Jane was running toward them, and the Doctor heard the intake of breath as she stared at Rose's still, blue-lipped form. Mickey was crying quick, short sobs; the Doctor could hear him only a little above the raging roar in his ears.

He fumbled with his sonic screwdriver, convulsing Rose's heart with energy. His hand stayed between her breasts, both silently and vocally begging for the beat that would not come.

--Preview--

**Chapter XXII - Fixing the Broken**

_"Doctor?"_

_He pushed harder against her chest, willing with every bit of him there was that her heart would jolt back to life. He knew he could do it, as long as he kept on going... As long he kept on going. He could fix her. He had to fix her. If he held onto that thought then he might stop falling. She might catch him. Oh please, let her catch him._


	22. Fixing the Broken

**When There's No Trust**

**Chapter Rating: **K+

**A.N:** Hey, it's me! I'm alive! Sorry, it's taken so long; college is trying to kill me. And two more chapters and an epilogue to go after this one.

* * *

**Chapter XXII – Fixing the Broken**

_A jolt. Convulse. She was still... Please!_

He couldn't think.

_Push. One, two, three... PLEASE!_

He couldn't breathe.

_Blow. Breath. Beg... Rose, **Please...**_

He was falling, and with no one to catch him. She was slipping – no, she had slipped. And he was washed away, his anchor gone. His eyes were open, but he could not see. His hand was holding hers, but with nothing to feel, broken and crumbling. It felt like he was falling, falling and falling, into a chasm of despair, grief and rage, and it would never stop.

"Doctor?"

He pushed harder against her chest, willing with every bit of him there was that her heart would jolt back to life. He knew he could do it, as long as he kept on going... As long he kept on going. He could fix her. He had to fix her. If he held onto that thought then he might stop falling. She might catch him. _Oh please, let her catch him._

"Doctor?"

Just get her heart going. Make it work. Fix it. Fix her, fix Rose.

"Doctor!"

He could hear someone; a woman _(Sarah-Jane?),_ telling him something, calling his name, her voice cracked, her words desperate. How long had it been? He usually knew time so well, but now it was nothing but a swirling mess he was sweeping through as he fell into his chasm. The woman's hand appeared on his shoulder, but she was practically invisible to him as he thrust his hands harder and harder into Rose's chest, his eyes hallow, deep and shining. His head was cannoning desperate thoughts at an impossible speed. His eyes burned red hot and wet, but all he could feel was the cold and shaking of his numbing body.

He was checking her pulse, with a hand on her chest, when he felt it. His hands were shaking so violently, he very nearly missed it. But it was there, it was definitely there. A pulse. Whispering along with the rhythmical beating of her heart, and the steady rise and fall of her lungs. He felt himself release a gasping breath of relief, his eyes blurring momentarily, as he closed his eyes lifting his head to the heavens for a moment of profound relief, gratitude, joy. Only a second though. A single solitary second; Rose could afford no more than that.

"Come on," he barked at Sarah-Jane and Mickey, who apparently were just behind him, watching with doe eyes. "She's breathing," he told them, "and her heart's beating. We have to get her to the TARDIS. Quick."

Scooping Rose up into his arms, he turned and ran. The world around him was in chaos. The bomb of Canary Wharf had attracted much attention, and no doubt there had been deaths in the building; not everyone could have escaped a blast that size. Above, the sun shone and the sky gleamed blue, faces the Doctor whizzed passed were masks of bewilderment, panic and shock. No one paid attention to the drained, messy haired man in the dirty pin striped suit carrying the young blond, with the two exhausted companions anxiously following just behind.

It took longer than the Doctor desperately needed to get back to the TARDIS. They had to drive back in Sarah-Jane's car; the silence, as the minutes ticked by, whispering malice thoughts into the Doctor's head. He kept his hand on Rose's beating heart, trying not to let his panic unfold as they neared the destination of the TARDIS. It was difficult though, to keep his emotions intact; Rose's heart was too slow. Painfully slow. Dangerously slow.

The moment the blue box came into sight the Doctor was opening the car door before they had even stopped. His feet crashed painfully onto the ground as he raced to the TARDIS, Rose shuddering in his clenched hands. Through the corridors, and into the infirmary he placed her down and grabbed his monitoring equipment. He allowed himself a single stuttering breath of mind numbing fear. One breath of total desolation, guilt, horror, terror and grief, before detaching himself of anything but the job he had to do.

He looked over her delicate features and knew.

All he had to do now was be her doctor.

– – –

Mickey couldn't remember being more scared. The clockwork droids were nothing compared to this. Waiting to see if one of the people he cared about most in the world was dead or alive, fixed or broken. It was one of those experiences he knew would haunt him for the rest of his life. What if she was already dead? What if the Timelord wasn't trying to fix her, but trying to fix himself – but too broken through grief?

Mickey wrapped his arms tighter around himself, staring at the wall opposite. He was sitting on the floor outside the infirmary. He'd tried to help, insisted even. But had only gained a stony whispered word of fury, croaking at him that he was not needed and would he please leave. Sarah-Jane had also tried to intervene, only to receive a similar reply – though, Mickey noticed, with slightly less malice. Now they both sat outside the infirmary doors, waiting. Waiting and waiting and waiting...

Mickey wasn't sure he could wait much longer.

He tried to push away the thrumming thoughts bouncing around his head; blue lips and dizzy smoke and a weeping Timelord. The silence was drumming through his head like a stampede. He couldn't stand this.

His head whipped up to Sarah-Jane. "Do you have a mobile?" he asked. "I lost mine in the blast."

She looked sharply at him, breaking her reverie from the wall opposite. "Yes," she said in almost a whisper. She took a small red mobile from her pocket and threw it at him. He caught it and began punching buttons furiously into the key pad, before placing it to his ear.

_One ring. Two rings. Three rings._

In a way the ringing was better than the silence. In a way. A little.

She picked up on the fifth ring and Mickey allowed himself a small degree of relief. "Hello?" said the voice of Jackie Tyler.

"Jackie. It's me, Mickey."

"Mickey! Well, there you bloody are. I've been trying to reach you for months. And Rose! That girl, her phones always off; it's a wonder she has one. Never uses it! And you're as bad. You wouldn't believe what's been happening here – darkness _everywhere!_ There was no sun. It'd just gone. And no sign of you, Rose or that bloody alien. Honestly. Not that it matters now, mind. It came back – dunno why, just appeared this morning. I was round at Bev's and suddenly – there it was! Light! You think the Doctor knows what went on, Mickey? Mickey? You alright?" Jackie's voice was drilling through his head. But it was noise. Blessed noise.

"Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I'm fine." _But your daughter isn't,_ he didn't add. "We've just come from earth. We – we sorted it out. Came round, but you weren't there." Well, it wasn't far from the truth, Mickey decided.

"Oh, I would o' been round at Bev's. Safety in numbers, she reckoned. Still, you could o' waited for me!" He heard Jackie tut loudly, before sighing. "How's Rose, anyway?"

Mickey winced. The one question he'd hoped – rather uselessly – wouldn't come up. What should he say? He swallowed. "She's sleeping," he whispered finally. Again, Mickey decided this wasn't far from the truth. He couldn't tell Jackie – she'd only worry. And if Rose didn't make it, if she d-

Well, then the Doctor would tell Jackie. And Mickey would be there to hold her hand when –_ if _– he did.

"I'd best go," he said quietly. "I'm tired, an' it's been a long day. Rose just wanted to make sure you're alright, before she went to bed. Fell asleep before she could call you though."

"Well, tell her to call me tomorrow," she told him. "I want to hear what she's been up to."

"Yeah. Course," Mickey nodded. "Bye." He hung up and handed the phone to Sarah-Jane who was staring at him sadly.

"She'll be okay," she whispered in a small voice. "The Doctor will fix her. She'll be fine."

Before Mickey could answer the door opened and the Doctor stepped out. Mickey was on his feet before he had even registered he'd moved, his eyes on the Timelord, heart beating frantically.

Sarah-Jane was also on her feet, clouded eyes staring at the Doctor. "Well?" she prompted desperately.

The Doctor smiled a small, but genuine, smile. "She'll be fine."

– – –

Rose woke slowly. Every inch of her seemed to hurt at least a little bit. Her arms, legs, head – even her hair hurt. She groaned, not willing to open her eyes and sure she wouldn't like where she was. Wherever that was. Where was she anyway? The last thing she remembered was– oh, god – the wall caving in – shoving the Doctor out of the way – darkness... darkness and dying –

She was in hell then? Rose's eyes closed tighter against the rushing arrival of more pain to her head. Finally though, she could stand it no more. She opened her eyes. The bright, light white of a familiar infirmary greeted her eyes. The TARDIS infirmary. Not quite hell then. She blinked and suddenly realized her hand was intertwined with another. Looking to her side, she saw the Doctor sitting on a chair by her bed, his head slumped on his shoulder and eyes closed. His hand was wrapped around hers.

Rose stared at him, watching as his lips twitched and his eyelids fluttered in his sleep. Assuming he was asleep. A pain in her leg caused her to shift and wince a little, though she tried to move without bothering the Doctor. He must have heard her though, because in a flash his eyes were open and he sat bolt upright.

His eyes went straight to Rose. Upon seeing she was awake though, he smiled broadly. "Hello," he whispered.

"Hello," she replied, just as quiet. She smiled.

"You okay?" he asked, his thumb rubbing over her hand in soothing motions.

Rose shrugged. "Little painful," she admitted.

The Doctor frowned. "Of course it is," he admonished himself. "Sorry." He stood up, taking his hand from hers and grabbed a small syringe from the table. "You're due your next painkiller. Sorry, I forgot." He gently took Rose's arm in his hand as she looked away. She waited for the stab of small pain, but in seconds it was over with no pain at all.

"Thanks." The needle must be from a century beyond her own, she decided, because she could already feel the pain ebb away from her muscles and bones. Rose moved her arms and legs, feeling the pain melt away, before looking back up at the Doctor. He was staring at her, an odd kind of searing affection, guilt and hope seizing the irises of his eyes. There was something else there, too though. Anger. Angry fear was beginning to color his features.

Rose felt herself recoil away from his anger and cascading emotions. He was angry at _her_ for risking her life for him. Though, the funny thing was – because he had saved her, saved the world and even talked to her a little more – she was finding it harder and harder to stay mad at _him_.

* * *

_**A.N:** You know what to do... _


	23. Sewing the Wounds

**When There's No Trust **

**Chapter Rating: **K+

**A.N: **Here it is! Here it is! One more chapter left. Phew. Here's this one anyway. Hope you like it?

* * *

**Chapter XXIII – Sewing the Wounds**

The Doctor sat down in the chair by Rose's bed and took her hand. He was still staring at her, all those searing emotions of his washing through her. He didn't seem able to take his eyes away from her face. She stared back at him, waiting.

Then, abruptly, he looked away. Taking his hand from hers, he rubbed it against his face and eyes, squeezing the bridge of his nose with his finger tips. He let it fall down to his lap and looked back at her. His voice was a strained whisper when he spoke. "Rose. You almost died."

Rose swallowed, but nodded. "Guess I did," she said quietly.

He stared at her, his eyes focused but dark. "Because of me."

Rose shook her head swiftly, frowning at him. "No, no it wasn't like that."

"No? Then what was it like then, Rose?" He paused, but she said nothing. "You nearly _died_ because of me. Because you were pushing _me_ out of the way!"

Rose scowled at him. "Yeah, I saved you," she said quietly.

"And look where it got you!" the Doctor exploded. He was on his feet, hand running through his mass of wild hair. His face was mucky, she couldn't help noticing. He didn't look like he'd washed in days – though it was probably more like hours. His teeth were gritted as he stared at her, breathing heavily.

Rose sighed. "I can't be sorry for what I did, Doctor. I just... I just can't."

"You nearly died," the Doctor said, more gently now; his head shaking, his voice breaking. "You did – you... Your heart stopped. You could have died."

Rose looked away. "Doesn't matter," she whispered.

The Doctor had grasped her chin and was forcing her face towards him in a heartbeat. "Don't you _ever_ let me hear you say that again," he hissed urgently at her, his teeth gritting together, vice-like. She looked at him, and saw the tightening of his brow, the dark pools of his eyes – the genuine shock and horror her words had provoked.

"Sorry," she said softly, and meant it. "I didn't mean it like that. But..." She stared into his brown orbs, mesmerized by the depth of them. His fingers didn't move from her chin. "It was rather me than you."

He broke away from her abruptly, sitting back in the chair. "You're impossible," he breached quietly.

She smiled at him. "That makes two of us then."

He didn't smile back. "You can't sacrifice yourself for me, Rose. You just can't. I won't let you."

Rose shook her head. "Why not? You're the Doctor; you're needed; you're..." she trailed off, unable to entirely put into words exactly what he was. What he was to her; to the world; to the whole damned universe!

"I can heal myself, I can regenerate. You can't," he pointed out.

"Yeah, well..." Rose looked away from, finding a spot on the wall opposite to stare at instead. "The wall was collapsing, I didn't exactly have time to think things through..." She didn't add that even if she had thought things through, she probably still would have done exactly the same as she had done. Anything. Anything to keep him safe. She looked back up at him when she felt his eyes begin to burn right into her. He was staring at her, but now he was somewhere between disbelief, pride and fear. She frowned at him. "I didn't think that..." she trailed off, and a hollow silence followed.

"What?" he murmured. And she knew he had just heavily resisted the urge to add, 'You didn't think. Full stop.'

"I didn't think that you cared... like this," she said, voice hushed.

He stared at her, incredulous. "But – but, of course I..." he fumbled, and shook his head. "You have no idea."

Rose looked down at the bed covers, and her next word were said so quietly, he had to lean in to hear. "Yeah, well, since Reniette... I just thought..."

"Don't," he croaked. She looked up at him, and saw the pained furrow of his brow. _Don't what?_ she couldn't help wondering. Don't bring _Reniette_ up because losing her was too painful? Or don't bring up the subject when she left the TARDIS because_ that _was too painful? She couldn't look at his hurt expression; her gaze fell down to her hands on the bed covers. She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer to her question.

"Sorry," she mumbled again.

"Rose," he beseeched to her, willing her to look at him. She did so. "Do you remember what I said to you? When we were trapped in that little cupboard?" His face looked fragile, but his voice was calm.

Rose frowned and tried to gather her memories together. She knew which memory he meant, she was just having a hard time fitting the bits and pieces of it together. It felt like she was looking at the two of them – as they sat in that dark, little cupboard together – through a long tube, only hearing vague snaps of conversation. "Vaguely," she muttered, a fur in her brow as she stared at him.

He seemed to deflate a little at her lack of memory. "I told you how much I –" he stopped suddenly, and swallowed thickly, his expression pained, struggling. "How much you mean to me, Rose. I told you I... I _never_ meant to hurt you. Never." He gazed at her earnestly. He put his hand on hers and sighed quietly. "I never want to lose you Rose. I don't think I'd be able to... to..." He wasn't looking at her; his eyes were on nowhere in particular, but far away. His brow furred and his eyes were a deeper brown gold than Rose had ever seen them. He seemed so trapped within his thoughts; desperate, terrifying, helpless thoughts. Rose squeezed his hand gently and he met her eyes. "You scare me," he finally whispered.

Rose frowned at him and shook her head. She scared him?

"You make me… want things, Rose. You make me need things. I've never… that is, if I had to choose between you and… and_ everyone_ – all the universe… I – I don't think I could. And the step we took before, well you know... you're so... all of it just.... it terrified me." His gaze fell down to their joint hand s. "And Reniette got hurt in the process." His lips pressed too tight together, as he looked up and his eyes seared into hers. "I know that doesn't... negate... what I did, but I was just –"

Rose placed her forefinger against his lips. "I understand," she said gently. And she did. She didn't like it very much, but she understood it. He was just pushing her away... and he got caught up in the moment; Reniette payed the price; Rose payed the price; and the Doctor payed, too. He didn't look at her then, a gentle sigh escaping his lips, dealing with the guilt his gaze on her fragile form provoked. "Hey," she caught his attention, cupping his cheek to meet his eye. "I forgive you," she said quietly.

He smiled a small smile. His hand rested on hers, cupping his cheek.

"Can you–" she stopped, and swallowed down some threatening tears. "I mean... can… can you forgive me?"

He frowned at her. "There's nothing for me to forgive, Rose."

Rose shook her head violently. "No, Doctor. I was being selfish. I was… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. For leaving you... leaving you alone. It was for stupid, _stupid_ reasons and I–"

The Doctor stopped her, placing a finger against her lips as she had to him. "They weren't stupid reasons Rose and you know they weren't. And of course I forgive you. I very well deserved it."

"Is it okay if I..." she swallowed nervously and went on, "If I come back? Back to... to the TARDIS?"

"Of course!" He beamed at her, radiating happiness, and she gave a small smile back. "Now," he said, clearing his throat and standing up, almost businesslike. "I just need to take some blood among other things – see how you're doing. I'm absolutely, positively, ninety-nine-point-nine-nine-nine percent sure you should be out of here in a few hours actually – relying on the fact you're feeling one-hundred-and-fifty percent okay, but I'd like to double check everything's in order." He gave her one of his mega-watt smiles. "Alright with you?"

Rose nodded, the corner of her lips touching upwards at his crinkled, bright eyes and light, joyful tone. "Yeah, course." Then she frowned slightly, and went on quickly as the Doctor opened drawers, picking out various pieces of equipment, "Is Mickey alright? Is he here?" She felt a little guilty in the fact that she'd almost forgotten about Mickey, preoccupied with her feelings for the Doctor.

"Oh, yes!" the Doctor told her, still grinning. "Absolutely fine! He and Sarah-Jane are asleep at the moment, though they kept by you for a rather long time whilst you were sleeping. I had to shoo them off to bed."

"Sarah-Jane?" Rose stared at him. "Wait, Sarah-Jane is here?"

"Oh, I suppose you might have been out for most of that. But yes. She helped. Quite a bit actually."

"Oh, that's good," Rose smiled. "I can talk to her when she wakes up, then."

"Hmm? Oh yes, of course."

He went back to doctoring equipment, taking a small i-pod-like device and holding it against Rose's arm, waiting until the blue light popped through before taking it away to his computer a few meters away. Rose watched him, content with the comfortable silence between them. It felt so... right. Almost like old times. In fact it _did_ feel like old times, just about. Which was good – it had been so long since she'd had a silence that was comfortable with the Doctor – and yet... she couldn't really let their relationship turn into something exactly like old times, could she? Not after they'd took the next step... slept together... not after everything...

She frowned, not entirely comfortable with the road her thoughts were taking her. She took a different route instead; there was still a question she needed answering. "Doctor?"

"Hmm?" Still on his task, his eyes didn't move from the computer screen in front of him.

"What happened to that man? The one who... you know, put those thoughts in my head? Did he die?"

There was a pause, in which the Doctor's eyes still did not leave his computer, but nor did they move along the screen he was viewing either. "Yeah," he said finally, and very quiet. He did look at her then, his eyes sad."Yeah, he died."

"Oh." Rose nodded, her eyes downcast. She didn't feel any real sort of victory with this man's death. But then, she'd learned that she never did really when somebody died. She could feel relief, and yes a sort of victory if the universe was safe again (for now), but the victory never, ever came from the death of anyone – villain or not. So, this man, who'd tortured her and taunted her, was dead. And she felt... nothing really. Just... nothing. It was a sad sort of nothing though. "So the sky's alright now?"

"Yep! All light again; sun's back where it should be. Although, technically it didn't really leave, just the delusions of billions of people all over the world, and the –"

"Rose!" The cry of joy came from the doorway, where Mickey stood. He walked quickly over, hugging her tightly where she lay.

"Oi! Careful," Rose laughed. "I do have ribs you know!"

He pulled back and grinned broadly. "You alright?" he asked.

By the door, the Doctor watched as Rose nodded; laughing and talking – it was so much the same as before, before all the come-to-life nightmares of Rose leaving and almost dying. It was wonderful, and he hardly dared believe it was happening.

Now if only he could move things with Rose even further – and maybe tell her those three words buried deep in his hearts too... – only then would he know things were perfect. And he _swore_ to any god he did or didn't believe in he was going to make things perfect.

* * *

_**A.N**: Well... there you have it. You know what to do. ;-)_


End file.
